FTF (Faster Than Floof) (floofinition) – The hypothesis that only non-humans can travel at speeds faster than the speed of light. The special theory of floofactivity implies that only quantum animals (such as housepets like cats and dogs) can reach such speeds, doing so almost instantaneously, allowing them to apparently simultaneously occupy more than one place.
In use: “Anyone with pets know that many are capable of FTF; just open a can and watch them arrive.”
Oh yeah … when there comes a knock on the door, we have FIVE FTF’s scrambling to reach their hiding places before I can open the door! More than once, one has crossed directly under my feet or … worse yet … flying from the back of a chair, over my head!!!
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Oh, what a scene you convey. Not amenable to visitors, then? Wall-floofs?
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Not at all fond of strangers! They are all rescues who were abused in one form or fashion, and they are very skittish … sometimes even I cannot get near them. During the summer, our A/C was out and it took several days with various repairmen clomping in and out half the day. The poor floofs were so traumatized they mostly stayed upstairs or under the sofa. I think they could benefit from a Floofologist!
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