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Floofnag (floofinition) – An animal who can be annoying or irritating until they’re appeased.
In use: “Bevery tries organizing her day according to her priorities but it’s always subject to the floofnags — Pepper, a little Dachshund and his ally in mischief, a diluted calico named Dust — who demanded treats whenever she starts a Zoom meeting and has a consistent need to be in all rooms with her.”
Floofclave (floofinition) – A group of animals’ distinct territorial, cultural, or social unit established within another territory.
In use: “The dogs established a floofclave on the back patio while the cats decreed that the sunroom was their space, but Sugar, the new scamperbeast brazenly went wherever she desired, sleeping and playing among dogs and cats, regardless of floofclave.”
Floofbacle (floofinition) – A sudden and ignominious failure or fiasco involving animals.
In use: “People with new kittens and puppies often must adjust to coming home and discovering a floofbacle as the animals encounter and destroy things like house plants, pillows, and rolls of toilet paper.”
Flooferific (floofinition) – 1. People or locations which are animal friendly.
In use: “Animals passed the word to one another that the house up the hill was a flooferific place, where visiting strays were fed, birds socialized, and deer ambled about, eating bushes and unmolested.”
2. A really special or amazing animal.
In use: “Many people with pets feel that their animal is flooferic, and can regale others with anecdotes about why they belive that.”
Floofbular (floofinition) – Floofdarin slang term, adopted from the eighties slang term, ‘tubular’, used among animals to express high regard or appreciation for something.
In use: “The cats thought getting tuna was fantastic. “Floofbular,” one told the other, which, to the unschooled in Floofdarin, sounded like a rising and falling trilling-mewing-purr.”
Floofnorant (floofinition) – People who are oblivious of animals and animal behavior, except for the barest awareness that animals exist.
In use: “Many of the floofnorant sniff and make disdainful noises that animals are dumb, don’t have emotions, and don’t feel pain. People who live with animals have a much different view.”
He sits and washes
Curls up and sleeps
Runs to the food bowl
And sits and eats
Yawns and stretches
Curls up and sleeps
Begs for treats
Curls up and sleeps
Runs and scratches
Curls up and sleeps
Plays with a toy
Curls up and sleeps
Goes outside
Curls up and sleeps
Comes back in
Sits and eats
Plays on the laptop
Curls up and sleeps
Takes my chairs
Curls up and sleeps
Watches birds and squirrels
Curls up and sleeps
Then sits and washes
Curls up and sleeps
Runs to the food bowl
And sits and eats
Cancflooflation (floofinition) – An event, plan, action, or activity that is stopped due to an animal.
In use: “They’d planned to clean the house but a cancflooflation was made because the cat and dog were sleeping together in a long patch of sunshine and looked so darn cute.”
Peeping Floof (floofinition) – Animal who likes to furtively spy upon others.
In use: “One dog, two cats, one crow, and one squirrel — all were peeping floofs, monitoring every move that Wade made, from the bedroom to the bathroom, kitchen, garage, office — a peeping floof was always monitoring him.”
Floofchief (floofinition) – 1. Playful misbehavior or troublemaking by an animal, especially in a pet.
In use: “The big dog and little cat were full of floofchief, chasing and ambushing one another, but also chasing the children, and letting the children chase them.”
2. Cloth used to clean off an animal.
In use: “Sebastian was known to slobber and drool — he was a big old dog — so it wasn’t surprising that Sid carried a floofchief around to tend Sebastian whenever necessary.”
Michael Seidel, writer 