Flooftypal (floofinition) – Very typical of a certain kind of animal.

In use: “Mama Meow was one of the growing flooftypal mothers seen on the net of late, willing and eager to raise orphaned babies from another species — squirrels, in this instance.”


Floofsensical (floofinition) – Something strange or baffling that makes complete sense to an animal.

In use: “It was floofsensical to everyone — including the cats — but the French bulldog loved nothing better than getting on his back and slowly sliding down the carpeted steps, and would do so again and again. His family began calling him ‘The Stairmaster’.”

State of Being

I’m crazy as the moon

mad as a clam

happy as a fish

flopping around in a pan

lost as a song

trapped in an ear

lazy as a duck

watching a deer

busy as a neuron

in a one-cell brain

guarded as a brolly

in wind-driven rain

hand me a drink

let me board my thought

never mind now

there’s less than a lot


Eqflooflibrium (floofinition) – An accepted balance of power between two or more housepets, or between housepets and their owners.

In use: “An appropriate eqflooflibrium was found between the cats: Daisy would have Cheri’s lap during the day, and Petunia would sleep with her in the bed at night. Other than that, they would respect a three foot do-not-enter zone. Entering the other’s zone would immediately set off mewailing that brought Cheri’s intervention.”


Floofxiomatic (floofinition) – Self-evident truth to an animal, or matter taken for granted by an animal.

In use: “It’s floofxiomatic to many pets that they’ll sleep in the best locations, and when people eat, they will naturally partake of that food, too.”

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