Afloofdala

Afloofdala (floofinition) – Small, lima-bean shaped mass of gray matter located in the medial temporal lobes, that allow humans to emphasize with, love, and care for and about animals.

In use: “Surveys and interviews show that people with small or inactive afloofdalas often thought animals didn’t feel pain and lacked intelligence. Those with active afloofdalas reported otherwise. Interesting, but the size and activity of the afloofdala didn’t affect whether people kept pets, but it did affect how they regard their pets and how the pets are treated.”

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Floofza

Floofza (floofinition) – 1. A pizza made or bought specifically for an animal. 2. Pizza claimed by an animal for their own consumption.

In use: “His cats always wanted pizza, so bowing to the inevitable battle, he always created a floofza for their consumption. They still came after his pie, though.”

Floofws

Floofws (floofinition) –¬† Recently received or noteworthy information about animals, particularly about important events.

In use: “By careful culling, he made floofws almost all that he saw on the net, reading, gathering, and posting humorous stories or daring rescues involving animals. After five decades of following politics, sports, and the economy, he was tired of the craziness and inclined to move to the comfort of the floofws.”

Floof Age

Floof Age (floofinition) – The first known period of animal culture, characterized by the animals domination over the Earth.

In use: “When animals’ first floofcraft arrived on Earth after their escape, they settled in neolithic humans settlements and passed on their knowledge of agriculture and architecture to help humanity survive and flourish, a neolithic era often known among animals as the Floof Age.”

Floofcialize

Floofcialize (floofinition) – Animal’s friendly participation or interaction with other animals or people.

In use: “Although the kitten was six weeks old and had been living rough on the streets, he floofcialized within an hour, rumbling up to the German Shepherd for companionship, playing with resident queen feline in another hour, and comfortably napping with his new human friends within three hours. By the next day, it seemed like he’d always been there.”

Nirfloofa

Nirfloofa (floofinition) Р1. A transcendental state humans feel when with an animal in which there is no suffering, desire, or a sense of self. 2. A transcendental state that animals enter when extremely satisfied, or high on natural herbs, such as catnip.

In use: “After sitting down and sighing to let the tension and stress of the day’s work and subsequent drive home drain out of him, the dog came over and put her head on his leg. After a few minutes of stroking the dog’s soft fur, nirfloofa came over him, and a new sigh, of satisfaction, slipped out.”

Polterfloof

Polterfloof (floofinition) – A usually mischievous animal, often thought to be a ghost or apparition, held to be responsible for unexplained noises.

In use: “They thought it was a polterfloof banging on the window, because every time they checked the window, nothing was there. But the camera showed it was a young white cat banging on the window and then running away when they came out. With a little patience and kibble, they captured the little goof and gave him a home. He always continued his polterfloof ways, though.”

Tuesday’s Theme Music

A cat and I were admiring the night sky. Well, I was admiring the sky. He was alternatively washing and darting sudden glances at sounds that he claimed to hear. I think he was messing with me, myself.

A full, bright moon obliterated views of the stars but turning, I found some to admire, and toyed with identifying constellations while listening for whatever it was the cat claimed to hear. Besides raccoons, cats, dogs, rats, deer, and opossum, critters like bears and cougars stalk the area.

Still beauty descended from the night. With it came memories of other times when I looked up at a night sky. Most prominently came a time when Bobby and I were on Sicily. Stationed in Germany together, we’d flown down on a training mission. Now trashed, we shared a rallying cry, “The beach at dawn,” and were trying to stay up until that point. It was oh dark thirty, and the Med’s nearby lapping waves was lulling us. Above was a fantastic array of stars, planets, and galaxies, the kind of sight that whispers, “Oh, wow.”

It made me think of “Wheel in the Sky”, a 1978 song by Journey. I sang a little of it. After I stopped, Bobby said, “Oh, man, I really dislike that song.”

Man, did we laugh.

As for reasons why he disliked it, I vaguely remember him mentioning that he thought it too sentimental, sloppy, and shallow. Maybe I’m remembering wrong.

I still don’t know what the cat was pretending to hear. I went back in, leaving him to prowl the night. Maybe the sound he heard was just a promise of something enticing.

Floofcabulary

Floofcabulary (floofinition) – The body of words used for communication between animals and humans.

In use: “Her floofcabulary was limited to a few human words, such as snack, hungry, bedtime, kiss, etc., which was enough for her doxxie and her to get along quite well.”

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