Ashland, Oregon — Thursday, March 26, 2026.
It’s 35 degrees out with disorganized traces of thin fog and a bright blue sky. Today’s highs will carry the mercury into the sixties.
We have gnat trouble in our house. We’ve been slowly noticing the little critters. From what I’ve read, they may have started around the houseplants but have moved to the bathroom. My wife takes hot Epson salt baths and the skylight has a new ‘white film’ and a spider web up there is littered with gnat bodies. Now we need to address stopping these from spreading.
Adding to today’s troubles, my sisters are anxious about what’s going on with Mom. They’ve asked me to contact her about her plans. I was asked because I haven’t been publicly denounced as mean and hateful. My plan is just to ask her what her plans are and not to otherwise engage. I’m doing this by text as Mom has developed a confrontational communication style in the last year.
Mom’s activities are driving my sisters’ anxiety. Mom gave notice to the assisted living facility that she is moving out in April. She also informed them that she had contacted an elder abuse lawyer. She then changed all her prescriptions from the assisted living facility pharmacy back to Sam’s Club, where she used to get them.
It seems like Mom’s intention is to return to her house. That’s what she keeps saying she wants to do. But since she moved out last year, all the food has been removed, along with most of her belongings. The home was being readied for a sale in the spring, with Mom’s agreement. Everything now is topsy turvy.
My fingers are crossed that something useful will emerge from this attempt. I am not out to argue with her plans or try to make her see reason or anything. Just trying to see what she thinks is going on.
Political issues are troubling me on multiple levels. Locally, we’re working through what to do with the town hall. Plans are incubating to build a new complex, co-locating all local government facilities. The price attached to that is five million. But this is a town which already carries a heavy structural debt, has a large headcount and payroll, and has been cutting services while increasing service fees. Spending more money doesn’t seem prudent.
Nationally, I’m waiting to see what the jobs reports and inflation looks like next month. The Iran War has pushed up prices. We’re in a momentary lull with the war but Trump is issuing new threats, increasing tension again. This comes after he said that Iran gave him a very nice gift, and that Iran and the U.S. were negotiating, which Iran denies.
On a parallel course, the U.S. said it destroyed another four more ‘narco-terrorists’ when they destroyed another boat. No evidence has been presented to date that the people they’re killing are involved with drug smuggling, or that the drugs were destined for the U.S.
Different trouble-oriented songs were served up by The Neurons in the morning mental music stream. I ended up with a 957 recording of B.B. King of “Troubles, Troubles, Troubles”. It’s such a classic sound and just fits my mood.
I hope the best for you and yours, no matter where you are. May peace and grace carry you forward through all your troubles.
Cheers
Michael Seidel, writer 
I forget … how old is your mom? And if she insists on going back to her home, would the family be willing to allow it just so she can see that it’s no longer “liveable”? I’ve never had to deal with this kind of thing, so I’m not familiar with all the ins and outs.
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Thanks for asking, Nan. There is a family component suggesting, “Let Mom live alone and she’ll see that she can’t.” I think she’s past that point. 1), she lived alone for about ten days last October, when Frank was hospitalized and died. She fell several times and slept on the floor once because she couldn’t get up. 2) She reported that she was talking with the deer in her yard and mice in her house 3) She also said that she was eating crackers and sardines for dinner because that’s all she could fix. That was when she had a full kitchen, microwave, and refrigerator. The contingent who want Mom to move back home also basically believe she will fall, emergency services will need to come for her, and then the county will step in.
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That last “solution” doesn’t sound very good to me!
Just from reading your comments, it seems to me she needs to live somewhere where she has more supervision and/or care. It sounds like she has too much freedom in the assisted living environment.
Also, it sounds like your family needs to sit down and AGREE on her care. Seems to me like there’s too many conflicting ideas/opinions.
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That last schism has just recently taken place — today, in fact. That is essentially, Gina, who’s dealt with Mom the most in the last two years. Gina is worn out. But we as a family made an agreement in Feb. 1) Mom was declared a competent adult and not a threat to herself. She would be allowed to make her own decisions. 2) We would establish and hold a boundary primary to now protect ourselves. 3) Mom’s best course is assisted living or a nursing home. However, rule #1 applies, painful as it is. We did this because Mom won’t listen to us, denies what we’ve said and what has happened, and hallucinates or flat makes things up. We want the county/state to step in because when we tried to get POAs to care for Mom and make decisions, it was basically rejected. So here we are.
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Thanks for sharing. I don’t envy you! Fingers crossed that things work out for the benefit of ALL of you.
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Thank you, Nan. Cheers
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