Tag: aging

Thursday’s Theme Music — Stroking

Ashland, southern Oregon. Thursday, September 10, 2026.

Heat is in the air again today. Sunshine sluices down between scattered clouds. 83 degrees F as of now, we’re looking for a high that’s ten degrees more.

I’m trying to negotiate a peace between Mom and one of my sisters. I’ve written before about my younger sister, Gina. She put in a lot of work helping Mom over the years. Gina’s husband, Pat, was right beside her.

When Mom’s partner, Frank, died at 95 last October, Mom was put into a bad situation. Given her needs and medical challenges, she couldn’t live alone in her home. Gina and Pat took it upon themselves to make space for Mom in their home, and tried including Mom in their activities.

It turned out to be a six-month experiment which became progressively worse. By the time Mom was taken to a hospital in February, Mom was accusing Pat of spying on her, stealing her things, and hurting her. We knew from security cameras that none of it was true.

Mom ended up being in an assisted living facility after that. Pat’s feelings were hurt. He was upset, which upset Gina. Since that time, Gina has slowly cut off communications with Mom.

Labor used to be special for our family as we all prepared food and came together to celebrate. I wrote Mom on Labor Day. She was pretty sad and miserable, reporting that she’d not heard anything from any of her daughters. She knew a celebration was going on but nobody included her.

I passed that on to Gina. Gina replied, “If Mom apologizes to Pat for all those mean things she accused him of, I’ll welcome her back to our gatherings.”

I sent that on to Mom two days ago.

I’ve not heard anything back.

Trumpapalooza kicked off last night. As anticipated, it’s about how wonderful Trump thinks he is, the almost open acknowledgement that things aren’t going well in our nation, and Trump’s desperate attempt to win the election by bribing voters. In other words, it’s more Operation Epic LOOK — SQUIRREL!, an attempt to distract voters from what’s really happening.

Beyond all that, the event is about stroking Trump’s ego. He thinks he’s great, and all others need to bow down to him. If everyone was as great as him, we’d have a great nation is his basic message.

Yes, Trumpapalooza was short on logic, facts, and truth, depending on your point of view. If you want the national and international order disrupted, Trump is doing a great job. If you want a nation based on democratic principles and freedom and equality for all, he’s driving hard away from those principles. Either way, he’s having fun, golfing on the taxpayers’ dime, sending out ridiculous little AI-generated images and videos trying to convey himself as great, blustering at other nations and people with threats if they don’t do what he wants.

Your Trumpapalooza Quote of the Day:

After all that, I ended up with “The Stroke” by Billy Squier in my morning mental music stream.

“The Stroke” came out in 1981. The song is about the music business and the need for bands to stroke music exec egos while the execs must stroke the artists’ egos. Everyone is stroke someone to keep it all going.

Sample Lyrics

Better listen now
They said it ain’t no joke
Don’t let your conscience fail ya
Just do the stroke

Don’t ya take no chances
Keep your eye on top
Do your fancy dances
You can’t stop, you just

Stroke me, stroke me
(Stroke, stroke)
Stroke me, stroke me
(Stroke, stroke)

And that’s pretty much Trump. He does his silly dance and his fancy ‘word weave’. The rest of us know the weave as lie upon lie upon lie, but for Trump, it’s the dance.

May this day reward you with patience, happiness, and good health.

Cheers

6

Wednesday’s Wandering Thoughts

A woman and a young boy stood near me in the coffee shop. Appearing to be about ten years old, he was occupied with a phone.

Smiling, the woman asked him, “Are you playing Pokemon?”

The boy briskly nodded.

She patted his shoulder. “Your mother used to love to play Pokemon. She played all the time.”

The kid looked up at her like she’d changed into a flying creature.

I laughed to myself, kind of amazed to think that children who used to play Pokemon now have children playing Pokemon. It’s been around that long.

But it’s the thing really to think of your children having children or grandchildren. Just another measurement of how life advances.

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Thursday’s Theme Music — Insanity

Ashland, southern Oregon. Thursday, September 3, 2026.

Cool rainy weather continues here. Today’s high will be 63 degrees F, ten degrees above the present temp. Blue sky is a memory as gray clouds take over from horizon to horizon, no matter where I look. Rain fell yesterday, and it was very enjoyable, almost springlike to me. No more rain is expected today; just clouds and cool temperatures.

My sister, Gina, is irritated with Mom again. This is about Mom’s Amazon purchases but also this new account Gina set up. Apparently, Mom can only have six transactions a month. Mom used three on Amazon already, then Gina paid three bills but forgot to include those for her calculations for Mom’s account, so Mom now can’t spend any more money in September, according to Gina. As she’s not communicating with Mom, she is asking one of us to tell Mom for her. I think Gina needs to own it.

I admit, I’m a little irked with Gina’s thinking here. On the one hand, she’s complaining about Mom’s deteriorating mental state and memory. On the other hand, she sets Mom up with an account with expectations that Mom will think of everything she’ll need for the month and place one order. Hard to fault Gina, though, because she — almost alone — is the one child living locally trying to help Mom.

My wife told me about a mother of five being convicted. Her crime was letting her five-year-old walk a few blocks by himself in their gated community in Virginia.

My wife and I were astonished. Our parents would’ve been thrown under the jail, as much as we freely roamed. I walked, ran, and biked everywhere, starting when I was about five. By the time I was twelve, I was hitching rides with strangers. On the other hand, maybe I was just lucky that nobody wanted to get me during that era. No one tried that until I was sixteen, when a crew-cut man in a pickup truck in his early fifties begged me to show him my pecker and offered money.

Today’s news has alarming moves revealed by the US Postal Service. As expected, Trump is trying to weaponize the USPS to stop voting by mail. As he and the GOP take a wrecking ball to nation’s norms, buildings, arts, laws, economy, healthcare system, and military, Trump is trying to keep as many people as possible from voting. He claims voting fraud but has never proven it. Likewise, other than small and isolated amounts, it’s never been found or proven elsewhere in the nation in this century.

Trump, though, is at once desperate to claim he’s popular by making the mid-term elections about him. He’s also afraid of that truth that he’s not popular. Whenever a candidate backed by Trump losing, Trump blames the candidate. Of course, the candidates he’s backed aren’t generally quality people, either, so there’s a load of blame to spread around.

In Texas, Trump is both trashing the GOP candidate, Ken Paxton, and urging for people to vote for Paxton. Like talking about how bad a restaurant is and then urging you to eat there, isn’t it?

Paxton is a GOPer modeled after Trump. Paxton paid $300K to get securities fraud charges against him dropped, and his wife is divorcing Paxton after reports of numerous affairs.

Big question: is Paxton also in the Epstein files, like Trump?

This was a hilarious headline:

Donald Trump ‘will quit after midterms and hand presidency to Vance’, expert predicts

That’s so ridiculous it’s not worth addressing beyond noting its existence.

Well, I also will say, if you think Trump is going to quit, I have a Trump Bible to sell you, barely used.

Speaking of selling, the Trump coin is officially available to buy. Except it’s sold out. And it’s a collectible, not legal tender. Talking about it with my wife, she asked, “Is that all they do, sit around talking about ways for Trump to put his name on things and make money?”

I read that another judge ruled against another Trump effort to ignore the Constitution and Amendments. That prompted “I’ll Stick Around” by Foo Fighters in the morning mental music stream.

Why that song? The song was released in 1995 and was It seemed to come from thinking about refusing to accept all the crap Trump is doing to our world. Then, thinking about why MAGAts go along with it. Then, reflecting on history — McCarthyism, the Ku Klux Klan, the way blacks, the people who lived on this continent before us, women — anyone who wasn’t white CIS male — was treated.

We overcame those things before; we need to overcome them again. And this song speaks to that: “I don’t owe you anything.” I’m speaking to the MAGAts who believe they’ve had it so bad.

Sample Lyrics

I still refused all the methods you abused
It’s alright if you’re confused, let me be
I’ve been around all the pawns you’ve gagged and bound
They’ll come back and knock you down and I’ll be free

I’ve taken all and I’ve endured
One day it all will fade, I’m sure

I don’t owe you anything
I don’t owe you anything
I don’t owe you anything
I don’t owe you anything

I had no hand in your ever desperate plan
It returns and when it lands, words are due
I should’ve known we were better off alone
I looked in and I was shown, you were too

I’ll close with wishes for you to achieve and persevere today and everything, in good health, with good friends. Peace and grace to you.

Cheers

1

Tuesday’s Theme Music — Smithereens!

Tuesday, September 1, 2025. Ashland, southern Oregon.

September arrived in Ashland, bringing colder weather. 58 F now, our projected high is 72 today with 72% chance of thunderstorms. Tomorrow is expected to top out at 60 F, with 98% chance of rain. So rain will come at last.

Meanwhile, most of the United States east of the Rockies to the Atlantic, north to Canada and south to the Gulf of Mexico, are enduring a heat wave

I’m a bit dispirited today. Another friend has prostate cancer. And Mom sent me a lengthy text last night. Another of my sisters, Lisa, took Mom new checks, along with a new tee-shirt and sweater. Mom told me that she felt chest pains yesterday and rested in bed. Also told me that it takes her three hours to get ready for bed. If true, that’s actually reduced from the three hours she required for several years. I was always astonished when visiting her and she would announce, “I need to get ready for bed.” She usually went to bed at midnight but began getting ready at 8:30.

Today, Mom texted me to ask, “Should I use my old checks to pay my rent?” I just went over that with her last Friday. So did two of my sisters.

Over in Iran, attacks began again as the war, begun in the winter, drags on toward autumn. I remember the days when Trump said the war was already over.

Instead, we have Trump offering a cartoonish AI-generated video of blowing up Kharg Island, declaring it’s “blown to smithereens”.

Like, wow. How old are you, grandpa? I know the expression but I’ve honestly don’t think I’ve heard it in years, maybe decades. It’s extremely bizarre to hear it said by an adult while discussing a war. I mean, it’s such a childish expression.

It’s a useful video for Trump, however. As part of Operation Epic LOOK — SQUIRREL!, Trump’s video has us wondering about his word choices and sanity, instead of dwelling on the continuing affordability crisis, or his lies, corruption, and general incompetence.

There are no reports that Kharg Island has been ‘blown to smithereens’. A US military official in fact said it was not targeted.

Your Trump Quote of the Day:

Yes, I’ve used that quote before. But it’s important, I think, to remember that when Trump was running for office in 2024, he blamed President Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris for bombs falling in the middle east — Gaza. He was arguing that the Biden administration had produced exactly the things he said a Trump presidency would prevent. Then he won, took office, and started war after claiming he would prevent wars, causing the inflation and rising prices which he claimed he would prevent.

Infuriating as hell.

Meanwhile, the Roberts Court said Trump could proceed building the Epstein ballroom. They avoided saying that it was legal for Trump to tear down a wing of the White House and start building something else without funds approved by Congress. That’s perfectly aligned with the weak principles of the Roberts Court. Equally, Roberts was part of the dissent, which is particularly laughable. He was basically bemoaning what the monster he helped create was doing.

Trump’s use of smithereens provoked My Neurons to bring up songs by the Smithereens. Among the songs in my morning mental music stream was “Only A Memory”. The 1988 song is about love, memory, loss, and history. As I have no love for Trump and wish he was history, it seems like a fine song for today.

I hope your spirits are high and your hopes are strong, and that you have the fortitude to overcome whatever is thrown your way.

Cheers

7

Thursday’s Theme Music — Driving Me Crazy

Ashland, southern Oregon. Thursday, August 27, 2026.

Another cool morning — 62 F right now — which will see temperatures in the mid to upper 80s again. No clouds are in view, just blue sky over a brown and green landscape.

Had beers with friends last night. Talking about Dolly Parton dominated. All admired her talents and abilities, but we addressed her sense of humor and willingness to support others more than anything. She’s left a tremendous legacy of kindness, a beacon of light in this nasty Trump era.

Mom is sick this week. She’s complaining of being in pain everywhere and freezing. I’ve asked for updates but she’s not responding, and my sisters aren’t communicating with Mom. The assisted living facility won’t tell me about her because security; they don’t know me.

Our conversations last night about what’s going on in the United States often circled back to the same point: Just when you thought it couldn’t get any crazier, it does.

Then I was reading about a rancher who is upset about Trump’s policies which were affecting her. She defended her vote for Trump, and it’s essentially because she worries about transgender children and her offspring being exposed to transgender children. Yes, oh my!

Which brings me to one of the most ludicrous things Trump ever said, and that’s a long list.

Your Trump Quote of the Day:

It’s an absolutely batshit crazy claim. These weren’t off hand remarks. This was Trump campaigning to lead the nation, feeding their fears and petty anxieties. And they have been absolutely debunked.

Just like Trump’s claims of stolen elections.

Does Trump believe what he said that day in August?

Doesn’t matter to me if he believed it or not. He said it to fuel hatred and divide our nation. We are stronger as a nation if we’re all helping one another and pulling together and was — and keeps — deliberately undermining that critical premise.

And then Trump has the gall to claim that he wants to be remembered as a peacemaker and unifier.

A unifier does not deliberately use hatred to turn citizens against each other. Nor does a peacemaker. A peacemaker also doesn’t start an unnecessary war, as Trump did with Iran (now going into its sixth month). Nor does a peacemaker order the military to kill over two hundred people at sea without going through the legal system.

Yet MAGA seems to generally support this. They foster a “conditional unity”, which is, we will support your and your participation and existence, as long as you’re like or fit into our narrow definitions of genders, sexual orientation, skin color, place of birth, ethnicity.

We’ve learned these lessons before. Under Trump, they’re being dismantled.

Yet, there will come a time when we’ll need to learn and employ these lessons again.

Today’s morning mental music stream inhabitant is by FYC. FYC is Fine Young Cannibals, a Brit group. The song today is “She Drives Me Crazy”. The band released it in 1988 and it’s about love and relationships. Makes it apropos for today. The Neurons fed it to the MMMS after I was thinking about how Trump and his supporters drive me crazy.

Sample Lyrics

I can’t stop the way I feel
Things you do don’t seem real
Tell me what you’ve got in mind
‘Cause we’re running out of time
Won’t you ever set me free?
This waiting ’round’s killing me

Hope you’re rocking this day and making good time on your daily life goals. Be good to yourself and to each other.

Cheers

2

Done — But

The sale of Mom’s home was finalized today. The house now belongs to other people.

It’s a relief and a sadness.

Mom worked so hard to find and buy that house. Buying it was only the beginning as she redid it from top to bottom. Her children and sons-in-law helped, along with her boyfriend, Frank.

Mom’s house became a holiday sanctuary for several of us, a place to go to enjoy food, laugh, and share news. I resent the circumstances which forced Mom to move, but those circumstances were basically aging, health, decline. In other words, life.

As I always do with these things, I look back, sideways, forward, connecting Mom’s circumstances to others’ positions, including my own, my wife, her family, and the rest of my family and friends. I’m trying to look at the bright side of this. This is some, I’m sure. But it will take some time for that brightness to overtake the darkness I see at the moment.

I feel for Mom and where she is now. I hope that with the sale done, maybe she can relax and lean forward some. As with many losses, I don’t think it’s possible to fully heal. It’ll scar over. She’ll pick at it. I’m certain there will be mourning, regret, and many games of ‘what if’.

I wish that she could look back on what she did and celebrate that achievement. That’s where I’ll try to go, and I hope I can help her get there.

7

Strange, Short Dream

I arrived at home. Not mine, but Mom’s.

It wasn’t one of the places she lived in real life, but I knew it was her house.

No one else was there. The place was messy in many places, totally opposite of anyplace I’ve lived or visited where Mom was in command.

Getting there, I found a narrow bed. White sheets, pink blanket, pillow, but unmade. I decided to sleep a bit.

A long-haired gray and white cat joined me. I talked to it in the way we do with animals, telling the cat, a male, I knew, was very handsome. The cat then *ahem* indicated that it wanted to have sex with me.

Full-blown horror lashed me. I rejected that completely, telling the cat that was sick and disgusting. I added, “You can sleep with me but as a cat, not a sexual partner.”

Unable to sleep after that, I got up and walked around, taking notice of the mess. Part of it on one end was a pond with rocks. Water fed into it but the water was scummy, full of plants and crap. Deciding I would clean it, I went off, found rags, buckets, tools.

My sisters arrived, chattering and laughing, before I could clean it but after a sort pause, I did. In dream fashion, it was miraculously fast and easy.

I showed the others. Everyone was impressed by what I’d done. Two turtles emerged from the pond. My youngest sister exclaimed, “I knew there were turtles in there.”

One turtle puked. Examining that, my sister announced with happiness, “It’s pregnant. I am so happy.”

Mom arrived shortly afterward, the middle-aged person I knew for most of my life. Her hair was blond and she was wearing black slacks with this black and white polka-dotted frilly shirt that she often liked to wear. Smiling and happy, she came in, saying hello to all of us.

Dream end

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Friday’s Theme Music — Ignored

Ashland, southern Oregon. Friday, August 21, 2026.

It’s a cool 75 F under cloudy skies right now. Looks like it could rain but rain is not in our forecast. Today’s high is expected to be 90, ten degrees lower than what we saw yesterday.

Mom is really down right now. She feels trapped and ignored, and that’s very understandable.

Mom texted me that her PCP told her she looks tired and old. Mom’s claim; don’t know if that’s what the doctor said. Mom also texted me, “I don’t want to see another birthday,” “Why won’t God let me die,” and “I don’t want a memorial service when I die. I don’t want anything.”

Mom, to me, always depended upon the structure of routines and schedules. Now her aging, medical issues, and medications has fractured her norms. She used to use cleaning as an outlet to stay on track, along with writing copious notes on her calendar about what was going on: children’s schedules and visits, appointments, bills due and paid, house and car maintenance. Those mechanisms are gone, too. She’s being told one to sleep, eat, and socialize, and she doesn’t like it. Additionally, she and her daughters who live closest to her have a huge emotional schism relating to their lives together and Mom’s choices.

Mom reacts to the gap with anger; the sisters react to Mom’s anger with more distance.

It’s like a self-fulfilling doom loop.

The closing for the sale of Mom’s house is next Tuesday at 5 PM. I texted Mom to ensure she was aware.

She didn’t respond.

Without real surprise, I see that Trump is encouraging the construction of AI and data centers. Backlash against AI/data centers is growing across the United States, creating an ideological trap for Donald Trump.

Part of this is that these types of sites take up land, water, and electricity, but nothing tangible that can be held in your hand emerges from it.

The other part of the trap is that the corporations often demand huge tax breaks and subsidies for the privilege of building there, and the locals are not usually consulted. That pisses them off, because nobody is listening to them. That was exactly the angry and emotional fodder Trump used as fuel to win their votes; he was speaking for them, ‘telling them like it is’.

Now, as others have done, Trump is ignoring them.

And it’s happening on the cusp of the midterm elections.

Those of us who understand who Trump is aren’t surprised. He used MAGA to achieve political power. Then he used that political power to enrich himself. Now he’s using it to further enrich the ultra-wealthy. There are no surprises there, if you’ve been paying attention.

Trump is breeding discontented supporters. They won’t vote for Democrats — “Never Democrats” is probably one of their most repeated mantras — but they won’t come out and vote for Trump, either.

All this thinking has The Neurons playing “Everybody Hurts” by R.E.M in my morning mental music stream. When people feel ignored, they hurt. Released in 1993, the song was written about and for teenagers and what they endure. I think it’s sensibilities are more universal than that.

Sample Lyrics

When your day is long
And the night, the night is yours alone
When you’re sure you’ve had enough
Of this life, well hang on

Don’t let yourself go
‘Cause everybody cries
Everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it’s time to sing along

When your day is night alone (hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go (hold on)
If you think you’ve had too much
Of this life, well hang on

‘Cause everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts

May you prosper today, enjoying peace, joy, and happiness. Hopefully, you won’t feel ignored or alone.

Cheers

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