Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofscribe (floofinition) – 1. A person who writes about animals, particularly housepets. 2. An animal who acts as historian or recorder, keeping notes on what happens.
In use: “Bunny the cat was the official floofscribe. She protected her diary because she had the kibble on everyone. It would be especially bad if the Humans ever found it. Well, if they found it and could read flooflish.”
Flooflish (floofinition) – Official written and spoken common language of housepets.
In use: “When in private, that is, when Humans weren’t around, the dog, bird, and cat conferred in flooflish to decide what to do about the overheard plan for the Humans to sell their house and move to the city. Floofcon 1 was immediately declared.”
Floofite (floofinition) – Person who enjoys animals’ company, particularly housepets.
In use: “A floofite as young as three months old, she grew up with two cats, three dogs, goldfish, a cockatoo, parrot, and salamander.”
Onomatofloof (floofinition) – Naming animals for the sounds that they make.
In use: “Within an hour, by onomatofloof, the rescue kittens became Chirrup, Hiss, Quack, and Spit.”
It’s a license plate that the state doesn’t like, but I nominate it for a bumper sticker.
Sunfloof (floofinition) – Animals who enjoy lazing, lounging, or sleeping in pools of sunshine, move with the sun across spaces, or sit with their face to the sun.
In use: “Five cats and three dogs, and all were dedicated sunfloofs, moving across the patio to remain in the sun, as if they’d cease to be without sunshine.”
I know it’s another Princess and the Pea complaint, but don’t you hate it when the ‘net is so slow that you can click a link, go make a cuppa coffee, drink half of it, select new music, peruse the newspaper, and then return to the computer in time to see the page load?
These things always trigger corollary suspicions: is it just my provider, or this location, a flawed router or modem, a computer issue, DDoS attack or virus, the web site, the browser…?
Bah. Too damned spoiled, aren’t I?
Unfloofable (floofinition) – Animal behavior marked by supreme self-confidence, surety, and self-control.
In use: “The ginger boys were in a vet’s office for their check-ups after a thirty minute car ride, but purring and unfloofable, they looked as if they sat on their own porch, surveying their domain.”
Floofistry (floofinition) – A housepet’s subtly deceptive reasoning, persuasion, or argumentation, usually conveyed by using big eyes, purring, or soft whining.
In use: “When he got his sandwich, he knew he’d succumb to his pet’s floofistry, so, planning ahead, he made two additional plates with lunch meat on it – one for the cat, and one for the dog.”
Floofper (floofinition) – An embarrassing (and often comical) mistake done by a pet.
In use: “The dog rushed in, tried to stop, and slid across the hardwood floor, crashing into the a bookcase, sending books flying. Ignoring the floofper, he stood off, shook himself off, trotted to the other side of the room and sat down as if nothing had happened.”
