Tag: holiday

My New Holiday

I’ve decided that a new holiday is in order. Don’t worry, it’s a personal holiday. It shouldn’t affect you.

(“Then why do I care?” you respond. “Well,” I reply, “maybe you’ll want to adopt my holiday after you read about it. Maybe you’ll want to have your own personal holiday. You can, you know.”)

National holidays are often so impersonal for me any longer. Commercialization, false patriotism, and cynicism have ground them down. Yeah, I get some credit for all that.

I was watching QI on BritBox the other night. As part of the program, Sandi Toksvig told about a Bolivian holiday, the Day of the Sea. A landlocked nation, Bolivia remembers the day they lost access to the sea. Here’s a little history about it from Boliviabella.com.

What initially detonated the conflict was Bolivia’s intention to charge a 10-cent tax per 100-pounds of potassium nitrate (saltpeter) harvested by Chilean companies in the Atacama Desert. The Chilean government did not accept this Bolivian decision and ordered its troops to invade the Bolivian regions of Antofagasta and Calama, where Bolivia had no military presence and most of the population was of Chilean descent.

It is because of the Battle of Calama that today we celebrate the Day of the Sea. With just under a hundred soldiers, Commanders Eduardo Abaroa (Bolivian) and Ladislao Cabrera (Peruvian) faced over 500 Chilean soldiers. Abaroa was obstinately defending a small bridge over the Topáter River, when on the 23rd of March 1879 the Chileans ordered him to surrender. His response was “Me, surrender? Tell your grandmother to surrender!” after which he was promptly shot dead.

I was instantly inspired. No, I wasn’t planning to shot anyone nor get shot or go to war. Let’s put all that to rest.

I love beaches, seas, and oceans. When I lived in California, my wife and I made a habit of visiting a little town, Half Moon Bay, almost every weekend. Situated on the Pacific coast south of San Francisco, it had wonderful beach access. Walking along the beach was permitted, and the town had restaurants, coffee shops, and book stores that we enjoyed. When it came to buy a house, we decided we’d buy one there. Hearing and smelling the ocean every day was wonderful. I’d get home from work and walk down there to check it out. Sometimes my wife would accompany me.

Moving to Ashland in southern Oregon meant giving up easy beach and ocean access. So, last night I decided to celebrate my beach and ocean addiction on a personal holiday once a year. Since I moved to Ashland in July, I decided my holiday will be on July first.

And like the people of Bolivia, I’ll stop doing everything and listen to the sounds of the oceans for ten minutes, and remember.

 

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Floofiday

Floofiday (floofinition) – a day to honor and celebrate housepets where no work is done, except to serve and help housepets.

In use: “As was befitting for Prince’s fifth birthday, a household floofiday was declared, and all activities focused on feeding, brushing, and playing with Prince. It was a day well spent.”

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Last Seen

Deadly cold sucked the heat from my bones’ marrow as I surveyed my surroundings.

“Here,” she said.

Here? Here was a sloping field of snow glistening like icing in moonlight. Here was a field edged by elderly pines draped in snow. Here was a starry black night and the pond of a moon staring down on us. Here was a wind slicing through my gloves, shearing off my ears, and paring down my cheeks.

“Here?” I said.

I looked at the traveler. Smiling like she knew Mona Lisa’s secret, she pointed past me into the sky. As she did but before I turned, I caught sleigh bells’ tinny ringing.

Distracted by the famous sound, I turned so quickly, I slipped on the snowy field and would have fallen, had the traveler not caught my arm and kept me upright. After thanking her, I gazed through my breath toward the sound and spotted the immortal silhouette of reindeer pulling a sled commanded by a pudgy elf.

I gasped. “Santa.”

“Yes,” the traveler said.

“He was real.”

“Of course. It was on this day that he was last seen, long before his existence trickled into your dimension’s awareness.”

I nodded. Then this was was where my story begins. “I shall find him,” I whispered into the silent night as the sleigh bells faded and the wind nuzzled me. “I shall find him and bring him back.”

 

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Corny Thanks

Sitting down at the coffee shop to write on this Thanksgiving Day in America, I pause to give thanks for how lucky I’ve been. I frequently complain but most of these are first world blues or the general venting against how the world functions in this life-experience-reality-existence.

I could enumerate the many ways that I’ve been lucky, but I don’t think that’s needed. Little of it has been within my control. I’m thankful for the strokes of luck that made and keep me fortunate. That doesn’t mean that I’ve not had bad times, but that I’ve always been able to recover. I wish others the same sort of luck, and that you have the security and health to pursue your dreams.

Now, I have my coffee. With that brief word of thanks, it’s time to write and edit like crazy, at least one more time. Sure, it’s a holiday, but the muses gotta write.

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Floofgiving

Floofgiving (floofinition) – an observance to show affectation and gratitude to housepet(s).

In use: “Every morning when he got up, again when he returned home, and again before going to bed, he showered his pets with kisses, and gave them treats, making everyday Floofgiving in his home.”

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Flooftivus

Flooftivus (floofinition) – annual secular holiday that housepets established to celebrate living with people. The holiday, observed over a nine-day period, is structured to include auspicious routines. These include days dedicated to vomiting, washing and grooming, napping, gorging, dashing around the dwelling, shedding hair, hiding, shredding objects, and being needy. The holiday culminates with a visit by Santa Paws, and the giving of gifts.

In use: “Although he loved his pets, he dreaded Floofivus. The Day of Vomiting was not fun, but The Giving of Gifts struck him as worse.”

 

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Floofoween

Floofoween (floofinition) – annual holiday when people dress up their pets and request tricks in exchange for treats. It often doesn’t go well.

In use: “Having dressed his black cat in a devil’s outfit for Floofoween, Teddy kept trying to coax the cat into doing tricks in exchange for treats, but he set the bag of treats down, and Sebastian the cat seized it with its teeth and dashed into another room and under the bed with his prize.”

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Flooftober

Flooftober (floofinition) – a celebration dedicated to pets and animals. In some places, it never ends.

See also: Flooftoberfest

In use: “Raising a sweaty mug of sudsy beer, he shouted, “Happy Flooftober. Who wants a treat?” As the dogs and cats trotted forward, tails wagging or up, as was their style, he opened bags and began giving each a treat.”

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Flooftoberfest

Flooftoberfest (floofinition) – an annual festival that emphasizes celebrating pets.

See also: Flooftober

In use: “Every year without fail, the Richmond home began the ten day celebration that became known as Flootoberfest. As was their practice, they began by giving their cats and dogs a bath as the bird watched and made comments.”

 

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Floofster Sunday

Floofster Sunday (catfinition) – a holiday celebrating cats, normally observed on the first Sunday in April.

In use: “For Floofster Sunday, he filled small cloth mice and birds with catnip and treats, and then hid them around the house for the cats to find.”

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