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Floofkeeping (floofinition) – 1. The occupation of owning and breeding animals. 2. The occupation of a floofkeeper.
In use: “Many people disliked floofkeepers, as breeding conditions led to deplorable puppy mills and too many kittens in cages desperate for homes.”
Floofway (floofinition) – 1. The manner in which an animal goes above doing something. 2. A corridor, hallway, path, or structure dedicated to helping animals safely travel.
In use: “The dog’s floofway required him to go out at dawn’s break regardless of the season, do his business in the backyard, and then find something to bring in as a gift to his people. Sometimes, it was a flower, leaf, or toy, but he’d also brought in towels, balls, sandals, and shoes.”
Sumo Floof (floofinition) – A large animal (for its species and kind) that enjoys wrestling.
In use: “Sir Bob, the Maine Coon, was a natural sumo floof, taking on the dogs, humans, and other cats with gusto, but never letting it get violent or bloody.”
Ballyfloof (floofinition) – A pet or animal’s extravagant publicity or fuss.
In use: “With the cat’s ballyfloof when he came in setting up everyone’s expectations for something amazing, the gift that he delivered turned out to be a red maple leaf.”
Tribfloof (floofinition) – Something given or contributed voluntarily to a housepet or animal as due or deserved.
In use: “Every morning, and whenever he came home, his rescue pup came to him for a few minutes of tribfloof, whispered reassurances, petting, and ear and neck scratches to remind the dog that everything was okay, that he had a home and wasn’t abandoned again.”
Floofdominium (floofinition) – A building, room, or complex of rooms or flooftibules containing a number of individual boxes, baskets, and other containers occupied by housepets.
In use: “The family room was where all gathered, a floofdominium with recliner and television, where cats and dogs rested in beds and boxes while he binged on The Kominsky Method.”
Flooficated (floofinition) – A human, housepet, or animal devoted to another animal, housepet, or person.
In use: “As soon as the kitten, Taxi, was introduced to the dog, Snickers, Snickers became flooficated, guarding every movement, washing every body part, sharing his warmth, and attending Taxi’s noises to ensure the ginger cat was okay.”
Floofdalize (floofinition) – Deliberate damage or destruction done by a housepet.
In use: “Once again, the cats and dogs had floofdalized her home, overturning the trash can and spreading its contents and wiping out her house plants. Of course, none of the floofdals were in sight; they were too smart for that.”
Floof-partnered (floofinition) – When people chose to be with animals over humans.
In use: “She’d been floof-partnered for over twelve years, and couldn’t be happier with her small floofnagerie of fur people.”
Komprofloof (floofinition) – Information about their owners that housepets know.
In use: “The cats and dogs had a great deal of komprofloof on Karen. Karen was supposedly such a healthy eater but her pets knew better. Although she suspected that they couldn’t and wouldn’t betray her, she always shared her secret snack foods…just in case.”
Michael Seidel, writer 