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Snoozaflooflooza (floofinition) – An ongoing celebration of sleep which many animals participate in. Origins: unknown, believed by floofologist to predate human history.
In Use: “Not knowing that her cats had decided to join snoozaflooflooza this year, Judi worried over how much the trio was sleeping, fearful that they had an illness.”
Haplop (floofinition) – Happy gallop that animals do when feeling joyous or energized. Origins: 17th century obscure Floofman.
In Use: “Hearing that he was going for a w – a – l – k, Scotter grabbed his leash in teeth and set off on a haplop for five laps of the apartment.”
Floofpes (floofinition)– Internet slang. Literally, ‘floof tropes’, overused cliches and outmoded themes about animals. Origins: Worldwide Web, early twenty-first century.
In Use: “One floofpes children often heard as they grew up was that they were ‘fighting like cats and dogs’, which many of them doubt as they see videos or personally witness dogs and cats getting along very well.”
Pecfloofniary (floofinition) – Of or related to the money spent on an animal, or an animal’s worth.
In Use: “After Jared spent money on his floof’s medical needs, many people focused on the situation’s pecfloofniary aspect, but to him, his dog’s companionship was priceless, and he would prostitute himself if it brought in the money for his dog’s medicine, surgery, and x-rays.”
Floofzantine (floofinition) 1. A complex animal. Origins: first noted on the Internet in the early twenty-first century.
In Use: “Little Serenity was a floofzantine, one moment a peaceful sweetheart, twisting into yowling destructor without even the benefit of a three-second countdown, making it difficult to engage with her for more than fifteen minutes at a time.”
2. An intricate or complex arrangement for animals.
In Use: “Living with fifteen rescued cats, a floofzantine structure was set up for the cats’ entertainment — which also entertained the homeowner.”
Confloofgence (floofinition) – The coming together of floofs; a unity among floofs. Origins: first noted use in New Floofland, 1860.
In Use: “The dog, cat, and kitten sitting together on the kitchen floor waiting to be fed was a moment of pleasing and historic confloofgence for Kamala, who never thought she’d see harmony among the floofs.”
Imfloofervise (floofinition) – 1. To informally make or arrange something for an animal without planning. Origins: 2020, worldwide web.
In Use: “Her floofie looked chilly, so Millie took off her sweater and imfloofervised a blanket for him.”
In Use: “Rescuing a kitten, Marcus had to imfloofervise a carrier to take the tiny sick animal home and give her care.”
2. An impromptu singing or acting performance by an animal.
In Use: “Simone ordered her dog to stop barking, and the dog responded by imfloofervising being shot, opening his eyes wide and collapsing on his side.”
In Use: “Jamal’s bird often surprised guests with imfloofervised comedy routines about what the dog was doing, when Jamal didn’t have a dog.”
Floofmove (floofinition) – 1. A stratagem many animals employ involving stealth, slyness, or quickness to get what they want. Origins: early nineteenth century, Europe and the United States.
In Use: “As Jason turned away from the plate, Hercules snatched his sandwich and darted away, a classic floofmove.”
2. Action used by a human in response to animal activities.
In Use: “Wanting to join George in his nap, the cat tapped George until George made a floofmove so the cat had space to join him.”
Flooflife (floofinition) – 1. The attention span an animal will give device, event, or command. Origins: United States mid-twentieth century.
In Use: “The flooflife for Sophia’s cats watching birds out the window was a few hours long, much longer than the flooflife for any of their toys.”
In Use: “Puppies and kittens typically have a flooflife measured in seconds when it comes to playing with things, often discarding one object to chase another.”
2. An existence spent living with or around one or more animals. Origins: Europe, early 1800s, derived from middle floofish.
In Use: “Feeling trapped by restrictions during the COVID-19 pandemic, many Americans adopted a flooflife, welcoming animals into their homes from shelters to help assuage boredom and loneliness.”
In Use: “People adopting animals find that a flooflife can get complicated, depending on the animal’s personality, habits, and sometimes, their new pet’s neurosis.”
Flooflial (floofinition) – Relating to, befitting, or of an animal. Origins: From the flooftin, floofius.
In Use: “Many people must address their flooflial obligations when they’re planning vacations or hosting gatherings.”
In Use: “Paul Santell developed a flooflial routine, carrying food to feed strays, eventually feeding and saving thousands of cats.”
Michael Seidel, writer 