Tag: pet humor

Floofvelation

Floofvelation (floofinition) – Surprising and newly discovered information about an animal. Origins: 14th century, Floofglo-French.

In Use: “Crystal lived with Priscilla for four years before the floofvelation that Crystal enjoyed eating peas and corn rose.”

In Use: “After rescuing McGyver (often just called Mac in daily conversations), Henry was surprised by the floofvelation that McGyver could climb trees.”

In Use: “Goldie looked like an average, ordinary goldfish, but Amy was sure that Goldie was special because of the floofvelation that Goldie always went to the surface and bobbed for a few seconds whenever Amy came into the room, like the little fish was greeting her.”

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Flooftwirl

Flooftwirl (floofinition) – Animal behavior that consists of it turning in one direction several times in a display of anticipatory pleasure. Origins: 2024, Internet, predominantly United States.

In Use: “As Judy drew a can of food out of the cupboard to feed Butch, Butch exercised three perfect flooftwirls.”

In Use: “When Gavin entered the house, Marvin the Mischiefizer ran over and did several excited flooftwirls before finishing the dash to her favorite guy.”

In Use: “Watching Mama Pearl do flooftwirls when the feeding person entered the room, the kittens were soon practicing their own flooftwirls at feeding time.”

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Floofralism

Floofralism (floofinition) – 1. Theory that two or more animals coming together shape reality. Origins: 1872, United States,

In Use: “Once Marsha and Geoff added three rescue animals — one dog and a feline brother and sister pair — a positive floofralism imbued the household, with everything becoming more relaxed and the two humans feeling happier.”

2. Flooflitical floofosphy that animals of different background, habits, and behavior, can peacefully co-exist and even thrive in the same household. Origins: 1787, Sheba and Champion (pets in James Madison’s household), United States (A Floofizen’s Guide to Flooflitics).

In Use: “Jeff’s two dogs were dubious when Jeff married Lori and she brought two cats, two birds, an aquarium full of fish, and another dog, but Lori’s elderly cat, McCavity, explained floofralism to the dogs, and adjustments were made.”

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Gakdar

Gakdar (floofinition) – A system of instincts and senses used to spot an animal’s vomit before it is stepped in. Origins: circa 1960s, United States slang.

In Use: “His gakdar failing, Michael walked right into a small, wet present from one of his floofs.”

In Use: “Many people living with a pet for the first time soon learn that good gakdar is a necessity.

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DFZ

DFZ: Deflooferized Zone (floofinition) – Space or location where an animal’s presence is discouraged. Origins: Late 1950s, United States.

In Use: “Many people who share a space with a floof attempts to create DFZs, like beds, sofas, and counter tops. But modern video surveillance systems inform them that once they leave the house, DMZs become comfort zones.”

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Floofracious

Floofracious (floofinition) One with a huge appetite for animal companionship or presence. Origins: 1635, Europe.

In Use: “A floofracious young person with a menagerie of rescued animals, birds, and lizards, few were surprised when Chase took her inheritance and began an animal rescue operation.”

In Use: “Suffering from animal-related allergies, Dovante turned to art to help satisfy his floofracious needs, painting animal portraits (flooftraits, he termed them), and photographing animals whenever possible.”

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Floofymoon

Floofymoon (floofinition) – 1. A lunar event that seems to make animals more energetic or active.Origins: Internet, early 2000s.

In Use: “Bristol couldn’t see the moon because of clouds (and he never looked up at the moon anyway, and privately wondered why that was), but he figured whateverI it was, it was a floofymoon, because the three rescue floofs (they’d chosen him) were rebellious and rambunctious in everyway imaginable, knocking things off the desk, kitchen counter, bedroom dresser, and bathroom counter! It was a night of madness and then they slept like angels.”

2. Short time when all animals or people and animals are getting along well.

In Use: “Most of the time, Bats and Snacks went at it like Steelers playing the Browns, so there was mega levels of barking, hissing, growling, and running 1440 minutes a day, but once in a while, a floofymoon gently landed, and the dog and cat groomed each other and napped together.”

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Doorfloof

Doorfloof (floofinition) – Animal who likes to be at a door but doesn’t want to go through the door. Origins: circa 2000 BCE.

In Use: “A classic doorfloof, Tommy wanted the door opened, but then sat down in the open doorway so that he was half in and half out, and just watched the world and snoozed.”

In Use: “After moving into her house, Julie discovered a squirrel at her front door. The little doorfloof was present every morning at about ten AM through spring, summer, and autumn’s early days. Accepting the situation, Julie researched squirrels’ eating habits and was soon ready with a treat for her little friend, who she named Sparkle, for the little rodent’s bright eyes.”

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Floofyism

Floofyism (floofinition) – Devotion to an animal or animal spirit. Origins: unknown.

In Use: “A familiar and common floofyism is when a person or animal (who isn’t a lion) is said to have the heart of a lion.”

In Use: “A look around Debby’s living room, and Kyle saw full-blown evidence of her floofyism in multiple paintings, photos, and statues of her beloved terrior, Captain Kirk.”

In Use: “Kyle’s floofyism was almost obfloofsive, as he wore wolf-themed tee shirts, rooted for teams like the Timberwolves, Chicago Wolves, and Wolf Pack, and chose to go to Sonoma State University so he could play football as a Seawolf.”

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Brigfloofading

Brigfloofading (floofinition) Animals coordinating together to cause chaos or disrupt activities. Origins: Internet, 2021

In Use: “People forced to work at home often share net tales about brigfloofgading, when their housepets come together in mock combat to distract them from whatever they’re doing.”

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