Catcimate (catfinition) – a feline’s ability to cause great destruction or harm.
In use: “Claws had catcimated the love seat and ottoman, and pieces of stuffing were pulled out of the cushions.”
Floofcessory
Floofcessory (catfinition) – a cat or feline that is not essential in itself but adds to the beauty, convenience, or effectiveness of something else; a cat a person not actually or constructively present but contributing other’s misbehavior.
In use: “The calico seemed demure and innocence, but as floofcessory, she’d leaped up, grabbed the door handle and turned it, effectively answering the question, “Who let the dogs out?””
Chips
You ever think, wouldn’t it be cool if they could chip our minds so that they can be found and recovered when we lose them?
Floofgesse
Floofgesse (catfinition) – abundance of spirit in a cat; a cat’s generosity and liberal giving.
In use: “The cat’s floofgesse led her to bring presents to his person every day. Gifts included leaves, flowers, towels from the neighbor’s clothes line, and found treasure such as rubber bands and pieces of string”
That Old Chestnut
Fun fact! Did you know that the expression, “That old chestnut,” originated with with Henry Chestnut? Henry was a pharmacist who liked telling comical tales about the way things were in his grandparents’ era, often exaggerating facts to absurd lengths. People in his town often passed on his stories, and the response on hearing them was often, “That old Chestnut,” usually with laughter. Eventually, Henry’s stories were published in a weekly column called, “That old Chestnut.”
The things you can learn on the Intertubes, right?
Drum Roll
Do you ever seem to wait literally forever (right, no hyperbole or exaggeration here) for something like pizza or an ATM delivering your cash, so you begin a drum roll, because it seems apropos?
No? Is it just me, then? Are you implying that I’m impatient?
Floof-eyes
Floof-eyes (catfinition) – Internet slang for a cat’s loving, enticing look, often accompanied with purring, and sometimes with kneading, or “making biscuits”.
In use: “She was on the edge of running late when her big Norwegian jumped onto the table in front of her and fixed his green floof-eyes on her. With a sigh, she began scratching his chin, accepting, she was going to be late. At least she had a good excuse, damn his floof-eyes.”
Catvuum
Catvuum (catfinition) – feline who eats fast and leaves the food bowl(s) empty.
In use: “She wasn’t a large tortoise shell, despite her reputation as a catvuum who would eat anything and everything.”
Ménage à floof
Ménage à floof (catfinition) – a domestic arrangement of two or more cats living in a loving and supportive relationship.
In use: “She’d always been a unifloofian because of Flash’s attitude, but Flash took to the two new fosters and a ménage à floof resulted.”
