Tuesday’s Bumper Sticker
Flooftella
Flooftella (floofinition) 1. Nutella with animal fur in it. 2. Television shows about animals. 3. Turning on a television or streaming a video or program to entertain pets.
In use: “Every morning before leaving, a flooftella was set up so the cats would have hours of watching birds and squirrels, an offering he made to them because there was little to watch outside of the highrise building.”
Floofstacle Course
Floofstacle Course (floofinition) – a path over which people negotiate going around and over their housepets to progress from one place to another.
In use: “Loaded with a large tray of fruits, cheeses, crackers, and breads, he had to get through the floofstacle course, edging around Daisy, his elderly retriever, stretching his legs over the big black and white Maine Coon, Panda, and then tip toeing past the sprawling but petite Lady.”
The Lay
I’m finding my way
through a meandering day
without much to say
Flyfloof
Flyfloof (floofinition) – 1. A small, lightweight housepet; 2. A bird pet; 3. A wingless quadruped who still thinks they can fly, or tries to fly.
In use: “At six pounds and twelve years old, Buddy was a flyfloof, but his vocal power rivaled anything Ella Fitzgerald ever belted out.”
Purflooftory
Purflooftory (floofinition) – the period of waiting for word on a missing fur friend or the outcome of their medical procedure.
In use: “The day was a waste. He’d descended into puflooftory, piddling around to smother time until the vet called and told him, “The operation was a success. Camryn is awake. You can come and get him.””
Floofbrarian
Floofbrarian (floofinition) – an animal who resides in a library.
In use: “Harriet, a Brooklyn Art Library floofbrarian, is a great help to all who enter the library.”
h/t to ForwardDog.com and The Sketchbook Project for Harriet’s photograph.
Floofsider
Floofsider (floofinition) – a housepet companion who remains reliably by another’s side;
In use: “Jade was a floofsider. To adjust to that with her pregnancy, Barb set up a birthing station for Jade and remained beside her while the cat purred and gave birth to three mini-Jades. As soon as the three kittens were large enough to walk, they became floofsiders, too, following mama and creating a little flooftrain as they followed Barb around the house. It was sweet and frustrating; Barb had to constantly watch where she stepped as the little furfloofs played around her feet.”
