Tag: housepets

Floofsider

Floofsider (floofinition) – a housepet companion who remains reliably by another’s side;

In use: “Jade was a floofsider. To adjust to that with her pregnancy, Barb set up a birthing station for Jade and remained beside her while the cat purred and gave birth to three mini-Jades. As soon as the three kittens were large enough to walk, they became floofsiders, too, following mama and creating a little flooftrain as they followed Barb around the house. It was sweet and frustrating; Barb had to constantly watch where she stepped as the little furfloofs played around her feet.”

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Floof Row

Floof Row (floofinition) – part of a property or in a house frequented by lounging animals, particularly housepets.

In use: “The cats, dogs, kittens, and puppies made the guest room floof row, resigning Carrie to anticipation of a big clean once the foster animals were adopted.”

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Floofbot

Floofbot (floofinition) – a machine that waits on pets, completing menial tasks necessary for their care.

In use: “As she gave the dog another treat and prepared to take him for a walk, she said, “Sometimes I think you think I’m your floofbot.” The dog sat down and gave her a hurt look. She rushed to him and hugged his big neck, kissing his head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.” Standing, the dog thumped his tale.”

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Hummingfloof

Hummingfloof (floofinition) – a small housepet that flits around at amazing speeds, often making a humming sound as it goes by.

In use: “Bruni excelled at going from the living room sofa to the front window and back, but the little brown hummingfloof was faster than sound when the refrigerator was opened or a package was opened.”

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Floofnet

Floofnet (floofinition) – 1. Quantum communications systems used by animals to share information such as gossip, homes that give out food and treats, and warnings of danger. 2. World wide web that’s devoted to animals.

In use: “People always assumed that animals sniffed one another to pass messages and learn more. The reality is that such behavior was respected by the animals as an ancient tradition, although they admitted that it was also part of their disinformation campaign to keep humans ignorant of their abilities. They’d long before replaced sniffing with the floofnet, an almost instantaneous method of sharing information across long distances.”

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Wolfloofrine

Wolfloofrine (floofinition) – 1. a heavily built housepet whose appearance, behavior, or both, reminds people of a wolverine. 2. Slang for a housepet that resides in Michigan. 3. Housepet that acts like a tough anti-hero but is often a private sweetheart.

In use: “A classic mutt of confusing breeds like that found in an animal shelter, the dog’s wolfloofrine appearance and attitude made him difficult to adopt, but Shannon saw him, and it was love at first lick. She named him Logan, of course.”

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Exfloofiate

Exfloofiate (floofinition) – to animal fur from clothing, furniture, food, and other items.

In use: “She loved her Samoyed, Thor, but the boy could shed white fur like nobody’s business, requiring extensive and persistent exfloofiating.”

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Floofbadour

Floofbadour (floofinition) – 1. An animal, particularly a housepet, who likes to sing by howling, barking, meowing, chirping, etc; 2. A person who likes to sing to animals.

In use: “Whenever he played his favorite album, They Only Come Out At Night by the Edgar Winter Group, his cat, who is apparently a floofbadour, runs in from wherever he is and begins loudly purring and meowing.”

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Floofcebo

Floofcebo (floofinition) – the psychological lift provided from the company of animals.

In use: “Girlfriend gone, fired from his job, and now it was raining. Suicidal thoughts were entertained, but his dog trotted over, sat down against his leg, and smiled up at him, tongue hanging from his mouth. The floofcebo effect brought an immediate grin. After a few moments of rubbing his dog’s head and scratching his ears, he got up, made coffee, and began making plans to find a better job.”

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