Coldpaw (floofinition) – Gesture with paw animals use to stop humans from doing something.
In use: “She was petting her cat’s back when he gave her a look and coldpawed her.”
Flooflivery
Flooflivery (floofinition) – Action of delivering items via animals.
In use: “Carrier pigeon is a well-known form of flooflivery, but people have cats and dogs they use for flooflivery, bringing the mail, slippers, leashes, and so on.”
Floofseeching
Floofseeching (floofinition) – A posture and behavior employed by animals to gain favors or reprieves.
In use: “The home security cameras showed the German shepherd knocking over the kitchen garbage can and strewing the trash around the kitchen, breakfast nook, and dining room, but when Guy went to administer scolding, his dog’s floofseeching (sad eyes, contrite body language, down tail, hiding in the corner behind the sofa) diminished his ire. He couldn’t stay angry at such a sweet face.”
Floofgring
Floofgring (floofinition) – Sounds an animal makes that isn’t its normal voice but sounds more like a grumbling human.
In use: “Apparently feeling ignored, Tucker sat down in the doorway and commenced floofgring until someone got up, gave him a scratch, and found him a treat.”
Demofloof
Demofloof (floofinition) – An advocate of equality among animals.
In use: “To ensure domestic tranquility, she acted as a demofloof when distributing food, treats, and scritches, even though she had several personal favorites among the cats, dogs, and goats.”
Flooftrovert
Flooftrovert (floofinition) – Someone who prefers the company of animals.
In use: “Margaret was an introvert by birth but become a flooftrovert and booktrovert by choice as she settled into days of reading books with her pets beside her.”
Floofdetta
Floofdetta (floofinition) – A feud without end or apparent reason between two animals or groups of animals.
In use: “Pearl the white cat and Simon, the ginger cat, had a floofdetta that seemed to have started before they met one another, forcing Henry, the big golden retriever, to step in as mediator.”
Floofbomb
Floofbomb (floofinition) – 1. A type of animal activity characterized by a system of intense moments, from staring down others to stalking, chasing another animal, attacking people, or nocturnal mad dashes.”
In use: “Scientists have been fervently studying floofbombs to identify predictors as help to pet owners so that actions can be taken to minimize injuries and damages.”
2. An animal’s interruption of another animal or person’s activity.
In use: “Cats and dogs love floofbombing their people’s Zoom calls, inserting themselves into screens and settling onto exercise mats.”
Floofeks
Floofeks (floofinition) – Race of mutant animals who are bent on destruction.
In use: “The puppy appeared quite normal, but within a few days, he’d destroyed a chair cushion, rolls of toilet paper, and shoes, revealing himself as a floofek. One could almost imagine hearing him repeat, “Destroy, destroy, destroy,” in a brainwashed monotone as he tore through the house.”
Floofsics
Floofsics (floofinition) – A branch of science that deals with matter and energy and their interactions with animals.
In use: “While humans observe physics, animals observe floofsics, often demonstrating that they don’t respond to the forces of nature, such as gravity, as humans do.”
photo courtesy of Facebook/Life with Cats
Michael Seidel, writer 