Dreamy Advice

Once again, my dream life has been active.

The first ‘remembered’ dream amuses me. As a loud voice spoke from some unseen space, I was told, “Drink more water.” The visual accompanying it showed me in a dark place, pissing like a race horse.

Okay, I’ll drink more water.

The other dream…hmm. I had three dreams with the same characters and message.

I was part of a group. Dressed in suits and ties, I was aware that others were present but only actually knew of myself and my leader, who was my boss, in one group. The other group was just one person, the boss, also in a business suit.

Each of these dreams were variations of the same scene and message. Each time, my group was told to report to the boss because something wasn’t going as expected. Each time, my immediate boss, in my group, would, with deadpan humor, assure the rest of us that it wasn’t anything to worry about because his boss didn’t know what was going on, and that we’re not to worry about it.

Then we would go in, as directed and meet with the boss. Dressed in a long-sleeved white shirt, his sleeves would be rolled up. He wore a tie but the tie would be loose. He would be at a desk and at once launched in a profane condemnation of what was going on, mocking our attempts to “change,” while decrying our ignorance, stupidity and general witlessness.

My immediate boss listened with aplomb and then dismissed him by saying, “You’re living in the past. You don’t know what’s going on. You will never know.” That infuriated his boss, even while it delighted me.

As I said, I had variations of this same dream three times, awakening after each time and thinking about it. I was amused by my dream’s direct approach about needing change.

It’s given me a lot to think about. Meanwhile, I need to drink a glass of water.

 

Hello, Writers

Starting today with a visualizing exercise. WYSIWYG.

Visualize yourself writing. Completing the book.

See the finished book. See it on your desk, in your hand, and for sale online, and in book stores, on end cap displays, and tables. See it in the library.

Notice it in people’s hands as they go to their gates for flights. See it in others’ hands as they’re reading in the park and at the coffee shop. Hear it mentioned in conversations and discover it in reviews.

How far do you want to go with this? Detail your vision. Make it a rope that carries you through each session and day, through the months of processing and developing and into the sales and marketing arena. See it all the way through. Create it as your vision and feed your determination.

Close your eyes. Spread your eyes wide. Reach out and put your arms around a star.

Don’t let circumstances stop or distract you. Believe in yourself and keep going.

Flying into Egypt

I was served a rack of what the hell dreams last night and awoke confused.

The most sharply remembered dream had me in a small airport terminal. I was well dressed and very happy, wandering about the small building and its small rooms, flirting with woman and awaiting my flight. It came shortly later. Nothing significant from the flight took place until deplaning. Then I realized I was in an airport in Egypt. I’d flown over some terrible sights, looking down and seeing wasteland.

My pilot was Egyptian so I passed sympathetic comments on to him. He seemed little interested and accepted the comments with brusque impatience before going on to his business between flights. Which, in retrospect, made sense. He’s a pilot, with things to do and little time.

I needed to await my next flight. I spoke with others about what I’d seen. They also seemed little interested. A few were confused. I had no pants on and was naked from the waist down, further confusing them. Having my pants off was part of my plan, I assured them again and again, smiling and showing them my pants in my hand.

Meanwhile, a beautiful dark-haired women who seemed Italian was present. She intrigued me because she was in a red Ferrari racing suit. I finally struck up a conversation with her, asking why she was wearing a Ferrari racing suit. She seemed secretive, furtive but flirtatious, and was coy about telling me. This began a series in which people talked to me about what I saw as I flew into Egypt alternating with her and I teasing one another about why she was wearing a Ferrari racing suit.

It was close to departure time. I put my pants on. The beautiful woman beckoned me to her. We squatted down. Leaning in with a glance around to see no one else was there, she indicated her suit and said, “This is for the future.”

I was confused. “That’s a future racing suit for Ferrari?”

Widely smiling, she nodded. “Yes, yes, it’s for the future. It’s very special. I’m testing it.”

Before I could properly respond, she lifted up a bag and pulled out another racing suit. Yellow, this one was for the Jordan racing team. Jordan has been out of racing for a decade plus.

“This one, too,” she said. “It’s for the future.”

I was now greatly confused. There wasn’t time for further conversation as my flight was called.

And then I was off the aircraft and in a new terminal in America, with an unspecified friend. We were leaving the airport and discussing how to leave. One of us wanted to get a car or taxi; the other wanted to walk out to the gate and catch a ride there, or keep walking.

In retrospect, I think the friend may have been me, and I was both entities. If so, that begins to make some sense, moving the dream out of the ‘what-the-hell’ category and into the ‘huh’ realm. It’s into the ‘huh’ category because it has some sketchy sense – future and past, and confused, indecisive directions and courses. With Jordan and Ferrari Formula 1, some elements of highly advanced technology and cutting edge performance is referenced. I don’t understand its context completely. More thinking is needed.

And Egypt? I’m baffled. I’ve only been to Egypt a few times, strictly on military business, traveling on military aircraft.

I don’t know why I flew in and out of Egypt in my dreams.

Today’s Theme Music

I thought I’d honor my starry dream in song. I selected one my recent favorites, ‘Counting Stars’, by One Republic, 2013. I like its juxtaposition with a religious meeting going on, with its revivalist overtones.

Dream on.

Starry Dream

It was a trip of  dream, setting itself up and apart from all the other dreams. Not long, nor very detail.

My perspective was outside of myself, so I could see me. It was a younger me, in a tan Member’s Only jacket so popular in the 1980s.

I was in a place I first thought of it as a void but I believe that’s incorrect. It wasn’t a void. It was in space, though, but there was gravity and I had no problems breathing. I was standing on something but it defied my senses to know what I stood upon.

A little old man was present, opposite me, essentially a bearded, robed, bespectacled fellow of cream-in-coffee complexion. He had an aura of age with a sense of being timeless. He was moving stars around.

I watched. He would move stars and then look off. Down, to the right, toward the world, to my left. I realized he was moving the stars and showing me the impact. I was delighted. “He’s helping me cheat,” I said to myself. Then I realized he wanted me to do as he was doing.

So I reached for a star.

I had to spread my arms as wide as I could to envelop the star. Glowing with soft golden light and shaped like an old-fashioned star on a Christmas tree, it was comfortable to hold, and very light. I moved it and then stepped back to see my work in the constellations. I was pleased and amazed. He was nodding while smiling encouragement.

He pointed back down toward the planet. I looked down and saw the changes I made. I knew I was doing that but my perspective only allowed me to see my dream self looking down. I couldn’t see what he saw, but I was laughing.

I thought, “How cool is this? He’s helping me re-arrange the stars.” I construed it to mean I was changing my fortunes, and that really excited dream me and watching me.

I think it’s a good dream to begin a new year.

Today’s Theme Music

Sometimes the theme music is about trying to influence my mood, reflect a more general mood, or capture a sentiment. Today, pining for the end of 2016 and commencing the countdown to 2017, I turned to Bruce Hornsby and the Range and ‘The Way it Is’, 1986.

I selected it because he sings, “Some things will never change.” He alludes to judgments based on appearance, beggars and the unemployed, and people’s callousness. “That’s just the way it is.”

I’m one that doesn’t believe that’s just the way it is, and things will never change. I’m not a student of history but I enjoy reading history. I know of other times when matters were worse for many in almost every term we can think of to phrase it.

But that’s not how it stayed. People hunted medical solutions to reduce and eradicate disease, or sough technological advances to benefit our planet and civilization, economic improvements for all classes in all societies, or pushed for freedom and equality for all without regard to how they, as individuals, differ or conform with anyone else.

I am one that believes that if we c0ntinue developing and articulating visions of a better world, we will achieve such visions of better lives for everyone. I turn to Bruce and the Range because that’s what one stanza states:

That’s just the way it isI
Some things will never change
That’s just the way it is
But don’t you believe them

Yeah, I don’t believe them. Things will change.

For the better.

“The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends towards justice.”

Martin Luther King Jr.

Today’s Dream Summaries

More intense dream sequences…more fierce writing: arc and story evolution, plot twists and character development.

The dreams…oh, boy. It seems like there were five or six of them last night. Some military elements were included, of course, because I always do dream of my military structures, jobs, situations and relationships, and some of the start-up world of my life was plugged in. Then, a strange blending of the two emerged. Records were confused from a start-up. People sought help and information. I was trying to look up information and striving to remember, what happened when, so I could provide them guidance.

I reached a pivot point. From nowhere, a very, very erotic dream that involved travel and business. My boss, a woman, and not someone real from my life, flirted with me. She was sharply drawn. I realized she wanted me. I wanted her. A game of seduction was launched. But business interrupted. Two other co-workers, male and female, showed up in the office and sat down. We needed to go on a trip now.  As we raced to organize and leave, my cousin appeared. He was a BFF in my youth. Living not far away and in the same school and the same grade, he was my most ready adventure companion. I haven’t thought of him in years.

Yet, here he was, hastening to help us leave by getting in my car to drive it off and raising my ire because my stuff was still in it. Grrrr. So what does it mean? The eternal question for my dreams. Another friend from my military days, a man also not considered for years, also made his appearance, but in the start-up world…but in his flight suit. Odd. What does it mean?

Then a third military member sought me out, asking for my advice. After we found an empty room and closed the door, he told me of a problem with his son. I wasn’t certain what he needed in return.

But…writing is part of my thinking process. I write to understand. As I write about these dreams, I realize, ah-hah, I’ve been looking at this wrong. I am not being given secret messages or answers to problems or anything; I am exploring my inner lands. I’m trying to see what’s in there. Looking at it from that perspective unfolded new insights and realizations.

More thinking (and writing) is required. This realization is like a plot twist that springs up as rumination is done about what to do, what happens next? The realization feels right: this is where I need to go. Now I need to develop the connections between this epiphany and…well, everything else between here and there. But it is exciting.

And cool.

 

Let’s Start Here

Let’s start here. 

I saw the movie ‘La La Land’ yesterday. As I watched it, I thought, this is the movie that writers should see.

‘La La Land’ is a song and dance musical staring Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone about a jazz musician and a struggling actress, Seb and Mia. I thought I was going to be seeing ‘Manchester by the Sea’ but my wife called an audible. We met friends, went to the movies and had drinks and nibbles afterward.

Let’s start here.

I discovered the dream of writing when I was in my early twenties, and young and arrogant. By then, I’d served four years in the military, and had tried and failed as a restaurant owner. Needing an income, I returned to the military. I ended up retiring after serving twenty years on active duty.

Let’s start here.

It had been my dream and plan to use my military pension to fund my writing career. I was thirty-nine years old so there was plenty of time. But the SF Bay Area where we were stationed and where I retired is expensive. I wanted to move to somewhere affordable.

But…my wife convinced me she wanted to stay in the SF Bay Area and Silicon Valley to pursue her career. Her career with advertising had started just a few years before but now she thought it could go places. It was making her happy. I agreed to put my writing dreams ‘on hold’. Note that the writing dreams were never really ‘on hold’; I was always learning and writing, first short stories, having a few published, and then pursuing novels.

Meanwhile, that region was an expensive area and my wife worried about finances. I sought employment. By the time six years had passed, a chronic disease, the dot com implosion and advertising companies consolidating and merging had snuffed her dreams.

But I flourished. Starting with medical device start-up companies and moving to Internet security companies, I went from success to success before spending my final years with IBM and electing to bail on all that jazz when I turned sixty last year.

So let’s start here.

As any aspiring/struggling/dreaming writer can attest, keeping the balance between marital harmony, life and family requirements, while working and sustaining the energy needed to pursue your dreams is daunting. It’s a candle aflame on both ends and the middle. Support is required. We make compromises and choices and withstand challenges. Our energies are taxed to breaking. We endure fears, setbacks and doubts. Sometimes we break, and sometimes, we try hiding. We often struggle and suffer in solitude, misunderstood and underappreciated, striving to remain hopeful.

Which is essentially what ‘La La Land’ is about.

As Mia sings in an audition, and I’m paraphrasing because I don’t remember the exact words, here’s to the dreamers and the messes we make, foolish as we often seem.

The other point in the movie that seems powerful to me is made by Seb’s friend, Keith. Seb is the jazz musician played by Ryan Gosling; Keith is played by John Legend.

So let’s start here.

Seb loves jazz music but he is enamored with the traditional musical styles. Jazz is dying, he laments. Yes, Keith agrees, and you’re killing it by playing those old styles. In order to keep jazz alive, it needs to change and adapt to attract new audiences.

It’s a telling point to me. To keep literature, reading and writing alive, change is required. We may love the literature that we read as we grew up but we need to face the new morning in the world. That’s what self-publishing and e-publishing is about.

Pursuing the dream, no matter what talent, skill or education is required, is about being strong and making the sacrifices required to achieve. Some of us are not strong enough to make them. We put others first.

Some of us are more foolish. We believe we can do it all, that we can sacrifice and compromise, and still achieve our dreams.

So let’s start here.

The Real

He awakes. Stillness is king.

Big snow storm was striking the area. They weren’t due snow in his zone. Snow was expected above five thousand feet. That gave them an almost three thousand foot buffer but weather is fickle.

He checks the time and temperature on his weather station. Three fifty-five. Thirty-five degrees. Three five. The numbers made him smile. Those were his lucky numbers as a kid.

Two cats investigate him. Deciding all was safe, they expect rewards. He feeds them and goes to the kitchen for water. Drinking it, he surveys the remnants of two dreams. Odd, of course. One involved his mother-in-law, sister-in-law and her husband, their car, and a white bi-plane. The other was military oriented, of course – structure and identity. The dreams remind him of wreckage after a hurricane.

Peeing was required. The business didn’t require much attention. His mind wandered to blogs and knowing people through blogs but not otherwise knowing them. He pondered the difference between aspiring writer and struggling writer and the choices the words reflected.

He went to bed and thought of a road trip movie. A writer. A series of events. A wife passed away. A writer road trip to meet bloggers that he’d never met. It reminded him of a movie more than a decade ago, perhaps two decades. A man retiring. He bought a recreational vehicle. His wife dies of a heart-attack while vacuuming. He can’t recall more. Details trickle in. Man discovers his wife was having an affair.  De Niro? Murray? No.

Ah. Nicholson. ‘About Schmidt’. What year? That’s too much for dead AM.

A working title arrived for his movie: ‘The Real’. He smiles at that. He thinks of it as a dramedy.

He wonders how much of this he will remember in the morning. “Sleep,” he whispers to himself and lets his breathing seek its rhythm.

So much to write, he laments to himself, and sleeps.

Four Headlines

I dreamed last night that I read four headlines.

I was online on my laptop in my home office. The headlines were presented in online editions of major newspapers and websites. Each was on a different subject and included columns beneath them, with articles surrounding them, just like genuine articles. One article included a photograph. All the headlines carried good news.

I clicked on the articles to read more and began searching for greater information. But I realized that I was dreaming. These were from the future.

Then I awoke, completely befuddled about whether I had dreamed those headlines or that the stories had all taken place. I consumed time sorting the current date and the headlines and establishing that I’d dreamed all of that. With some amusement, I fell back onto the old idea, maybe those headlines were from the real world and this was the dream. That would have been great because they were pleasing headlines and stories.

Talk about your fake news. Now we have dream news. Maybe that’s how some fake news evolved; they started from nuggets of dream news.

I’m not revealing any of the headlines or their subjects. I don’t want to jinx them.

They were very good headlines.

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