Floof Message

Floof Message (floofinition) – texts or emails whose subject center around housepets.

In use: “When she was away, her Mom would line up Cricket and Ellie, take a photo of them, and floof message her daughter the photo with a humorous caption, usually about the dogs wanting Rachel’s return so they could be properly fed.”

Tollfloof

Tollfloof (floofinition) – housepet who blocks a common passage such as the stairs, a doorway, or hall, and doesn’t let others by without payment.

In use: “Dobie and Gillis were both tollfloofs. Both liked getting tolls paid on the top stair. Dobie offered his beagle belly for a rub as a toll. Gillis, though, turned on her amber-eyed target acquisition system and swatted anyone who dared to pass, but with her claws withdrawn.”

Vacflooflate

Vacflooflate (floofinition) – for a housepet to waver in mind, will, or feeling about going or staying in and out of somewhere.

In use: “The cat ran to do the door, but once it was open, he vacflooflated about going out or staying in.”

 

h/t to Facebook/The Greek Cat Society (UK) for photo.

Floofvoyance

Floofvoyance (floofinition) – a housepet’s power or faculty of discerning objects not present to human senses.

In use: “I doubt floofvoyance is real, but I can’t explain how my cat knows that things are going to happen before I have a clue that they’ve begun.”

Floofvalry

Floofvalry (floofinition) – competition between two or more housepets for superiority, food, attention, or dominance.

In use: “As soon as he headed toward his favorite recliner, his two ginger cats and the Corgi positioned themselves by the chair, starting the lap floofvalry anew.”

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