Haifloof #42
Tollfloof
Tollfloof (floofinition) – housepet who blocks a common passage such as the stairs, a doorway, or hall, and doesn’t let others by without payment.
In use: “Dobie and Gillis were both tollfloofs. Both liked getting tolls paid on the top stair. Dobie offered his beagle belly for a rub as a toll. Gillis, though, turned on her amber-eyed target acquisition system and swatted anyone who dared to pass, but with her claws withdrawn.”
Vacflooflate
Vacflooflate (floofinition) – for a housepet to waver in mind, will, or feeling about going or staying in and out of somewhere.
In use: “The cat ran to do the door, but once it was open, he vacflooflated about going out or staying in.”
h/t to Facebook/The Greek Cat Society (UK) for photo.
Floofvoyance
Floofvoyance (floofinition) – a housepet’s power or faculty of discerning objects not present to human senses.
In use: “I doubt floofvoyance is real, but I can’t explain how my cat knows that things are going to happen before I have a clue that they’ve begun.”
Floofvalry
Floofvalry (floofinition) – competition between two or more housepets for superiority, food, attention, or dominance.
In use: “As soon as he headed toward his favorite recliner, his two ginger cats and the Corgi positioned themselves by the chair, starting the lap floofvalry anew.”
Malafloof
Malafloof (floofinition) – an impudently bold or saucy animal, especially housepets.
In use: “The puppy was but four pounds and arrived as a shy, withdrawn animal. Within three days, he’d found his energy, emerging as a malafloof who entertained himself by going after the cats and other dogs. The cats educated him with a few quick hisses and smacks, but the dogs indulged him, especially Whitney, who seemed amused.”
Michael Seidel, writer 