Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
After realizing Paul Simon only gave five ways to leave your lover in his song, “Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover”, he felt obliged to find five more.
Just jump on your bike, Mike.
Follow your itch, Mitch.
Get a new job, Bob.
Buy an online tic, Rick.
And drive away, Ray.
His work was done.
Floofguistics (floofinition) – The study of animal languages, including the nature, use, structure, and modification of language.
In use: “Like many housepets, Hilda longed for a good course of floofguistics for her human friends so that they would quit trying to feed her when she asked them what the weather forecast was, and the like.”
Extrofloof (floofinition) – 1. A normally shy or withdrawn person who becomes more outgoing and friendly when they meet animals.
In use: “Becca usually hung to the wall on the rare occasions when she accepted invitations to another’s house, but whenever she met family pets, she bloomed into an extrovert, playing and talking with the animals like they were old friends.”
2. An energetic, outgoing animal.
In use: “Goober was fearless and friendly, an extrofloof to the core, excited to meet animals and people, always pleased to have a new acquaintance.”
Barkalounger (floofinition) – Place where a dog enjoys relaxing.
In use: “The sofa was the dogs’ favorite barkalounger, gathering on it quickly when it became available, jockeying for the best spot, but the cat often beat them there, and nobody messed with the Queen.”
He encountered his neighbor as she walked her son’s dog. “Happy Saturday,” she called.
He responded in the same. She enthused, “It’s a gorgeous day.”
Both looked up at the blue sky and sun. Yes, he agreed, and told her that Alexa said it was foggy and to expect rain showers throughout the day.
She laughed. “That wouldn’t surprise me. It’s probably coming. I don’t care. I’m just enjoying this now.”
He read the headline and then the story.
Yes, because things were going so well for the planet’s humanity. A zombie virus is the perfect addition.
Legerdefloof (floofinition) – An adroit display of skill or cleverness by an animal.
In use: “Employing legerdefloof with teeth and paws, the golden retriever unwrapped his leash from where it was tied to keep him wandering, and then went over, did the same with his companion’s leash, freeing the two to take off and explore the park.”
