Category: humor

Tuesday’s Wandering Thought

He’d done Wordle in two moves yesterday, and he was proud and pleased. Two moves! He was usually lucky to get it done in four. But he’d taken his wife’s advice to be intuitive. And, you know, he’d been lucky.

She’d finally joined him in the office, giving him the chance to crow. After mentioning the intuition thing, he said, “So my first guess was offbeat.”

Confusion creased her expression. “Offbeat is too big.”

He stared at her. “Let me try again. My first guess was an offbeat word choice.”

“Choice is six letters. That’s too many letters.” Understanding broke on her face. “Oh, I see.”

His stare deepened. “Tell you what, honey. Let’s get some coffee in you and then I’ll continue this tale.”

Both laughed.

0

Floofmosis

Floofmosis (floofinition) – Animal’s ability to unobtrusively expand and move, without apparently moving, to take over an entire space, despite its size.

In use: “The family cats and dogs were all floofmosis masters. Each was cabable of settling on a bed or chair with a person and slowly pushing the person out, even though the animals all weighed less than twenty pounds and the people were all over one hundred ten pounds and had both weight and size advantages over the animals. They just couldn’t compete with the floofmosis.”

1

Flooftouch

Flooftouch (floofinition) – A person who is easily is easily taken advantage or manipulated by animals.

In use: “Michael was such a flooftouch for his cats. All that was needed was a purr, meow, or even just a look, and he responded by asking them what they wanted, hurrying about to give them treats or food, let them out, or

3

Thursday’s Wandering Thought

His diet amounted to the foods he chose for his health, things his body craved, and then the comfort foods for when his body says, “Hey, it was bad day. How ‘bout some carbs?”

4

Carfloof

Carfloof (floofinition) – Animal who enjoys car rides or who prefers using cars as shelter or protection.

In use: “A true carfloof, the little tabby started riding in cars when she was six months old, enjoying the view from the center console, rising up on to her back legs to watch everything going on outside the windows.”

7

Wednesday’s Wandering Thought

The husband and wife were complaining about cutbacks. The city had removed the drop boxes for utility bills from ‘their’ end of town, necessitating a two mile walk or drive to drop the bill off. “Hardly a drop off,” he huffed.

She said, “They keep cutting services back but we keep paying more.”

He began laughing. “We sound just like our parents.” Standing, he said in a raised voice, “I remember when they delivered the mail twice a day and stamps were three cents.”

It was funny, even if it was all true. Someday, Gen Z will complain and say that they sound just like the Boomers.

0

Floofment

Floofment (floofinition) – Animal action to instigate a reaction or rouse others.

In use: “The dog learned that the best way to floofment Suzanne and get her attention was to jump up, look towards the downstairs area as if hearing something, and then start barking like mad. It worked every time.”

1

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑