The News, Oh, Boy

Did you see the news today? Oh, boy. Nabisco announced an exciting new Oreo flavor. They’re putting Pop-rocks candy in their cookie and calling it the “Firework” Oreo. I think the only that could make that better is if the center was an ice cream filling with Pop-rocks candy, and they rolled it in funnel cake batter, deep-fried it, sprayed it with chocolate sauce and splashed confectionery sugar all over it.

Bet that’s coming to a county or state fair soon.

Not satisfied with resting on their flavors, Nabisco is challenging us, the public, to come up with the next new flavor of Oreo cookies. For that, they’ll pay five hundred thousand big ones, which is to say, American dollars. That’s a lot of cookies.

Naturally, I struggled to come up with an idea. The only thing that entered my feeble mind was a classic Neapolitan Oreo. The bottom would be a strawberry cookie. Vanilla cream would be in the middle, topped with the traditional chocolate Oreo. Sadly, I don’t think that’s special enough. Instead, I think they need something like red hot Oreos, all red and fiery with cinnamon flavors.

No, that’ not crazy enough. Well, someone will come up with something sufficiently crazy. It just won’t be me. Bummer.

I could use an extra half a rock.


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