Tag: satire

Twozdaz Wandering Political Thoughs

Just a reminder of what Saint Ronnie said…not that it matters to the MAGAlodytes. History is not their forte. Nor is critical thinking or bucking their beloved Trump, he who speaks from his ass, but says what they want to hear.

Meanwhile, back where the GOP controls the House, Senate, and the building formerly known as the White House, Trump shows his contempt and hatred for the United States and its citizens.

The poor should starve, says Trump administration

Sure, why not let Americans starve? There’d be less of ’em to grift, sure, but less of them to feed, less of them to criticize Trump, less of them to complain. Plus, with less ‘Muricans out there, simple supply and demand kicks in. Less people = less demand = less inflationary pressures = lower prices = happier people. That’s Trump’s ‘thinking’. All will be happy except those mourning the dead and those with the thinking set to see where all that will lead. Trump never did get the whole empathy and love thing. Never will. “Me, me, me,” is all he ever thinks and says. Which means he’ll screw We the People and the Constitution every time.

Trump really is a radical rightwing despot. So deranged. So radical and VERY LOW IQ. He proves it with his tweets on a regular basis. People read his tweets and ask, “How can this man walk and breathe at the same time? His IQ is too low to walk and breathe at the same time.” If it wasn’t for Putin, Trump would’ve already been imprisoned for his crimes against the United States. Should have happened after his first term. But Putin intervened and said, “No, he is a useful fool. Do what we can to get him re-elected so we can use his hatred of the United States so we can destroy it as an economic powerhouse and democracy once and for all.”

Trump doesn’t understand math. Third grade arithmetic. History. Science. Medicine. Sports. Cheats at everything. Everything. When he took the cognitive test, he paid people off to help him identify the animals. They were cheaply paid off, of course. Took just the promise of money. They’ll never see that money. He always breaks all of his promises.

That’s the Trump bottom line. Terrible person. Breaks everything. Breaking the nation. Destroying the White House. Cratering the economy.

But at least ‘the left’ is upset. So MAGAland is happy.

For now.

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Life in Trump’s Alternative World

My wife and I climbed into the car. I started the engine. After over revving it, I began driving in reverse. My wife asked, “Why are we in reverse?”

“Everyone says that you get better mileage in reverse.” I swung the transmission into drive. “Now I think I’ll go this way.” I turned on the windshield wipers.

My wife peered into the sunlit blue sky. “Why are the windshield wipers on?”

“We need gas,” I declared. “We don’t have enough money for a full tank.”

“I’m starving,” my wife replied. “I thought we were going out for dinner. Where can we get something to eat?”

“We don’t have money for food. Just hold on.” I pulled into a miniature golf course. “I think I’ll play a game.”

My wife objected, “I didn’t think we have the money.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll get more money.”

I went in and paid for the game. Before teeing off, I went back to the car. Jumping in, we drove off.

My wife looked around in puzzlement. “Where are we going?”

“Straight ahead.”

“This is the opposite direction of where we were going.”

“Don’t worry, I’m taking a short cut.”

“What happened to your miniature golf game?”

“I played it. Set a new record. I was stripes.”

“But you weren’t gone five minutes.”

“I know. It was the fastest golf game ever. I scored more points than anyone in the game’s history.” I steered the car into the path of oncoming traffic. “They were amazed. Said they’d never seen anyone play like that. They’re giving me a special golfing medal.”

A truck almost hit us. My wife screamed. “Get on the right side of the road. What is wrong with you?”

“Don’t worry,” I replied, “they’ll get out of our way.”

The car’s engine coughed and sputtered.

“What’s wrong with the car?” my wife asked.

“I think it’s the wind,” I answered, throwing open the door.

My wife gasped. “What are you doing? The car’s still moving. You’re going to get yourself killed.” Leaning across, she grabbed the wheel and began steering.

After turning on the radio, I leaped out of the car and rolled across a lane. A car screeched to a halt, almost hitting me. Leaving their car and coming toward me, the driver said, “Oh my God, I almost hit you. What’s going on? Are you alright?”

Beaming, I took off my shirt. “Aren’t I ripped?” I nodded toward my car as my wife managed to steer and stop it. “It’s my wife. She made me do it. She’s crazy. Doesn’t know a thing about flying. She shouldn’t be allowed near a boat.”

Stepping in front of a car, I waved my arms. “Help, help. Call the police. This guy’s trying to kill me.”

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Swear, Cry, and Sigh

Saturday Memes … Food For Thought

Jill Dennison has done it again. She’s collected some memes that definitely need to be shared with more folks. Some made me swear, some made me cry, and some were rewarded with heavy sighs. Sometimes, I did all of that at once. Here a few to whet your interest. They show, with these simple words and images, how far we’ve been twisted by Trump’s alternate reality in the United States. Head to Jill’s site to read ’em all. Cheers

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Mundaz Wandering Political Thoughts

Peter Sage shared a guest post on his site. Peter is a regular liberal. Alan DeBoer is a wealthy Republican. DeBoer wrote the post with AI’s help.

I’m familiar with Alan DeBoer. As an Ashland resident, I’ve met him a few times. He always struck me as a smooth, smiling, and conniving businessman, typical of many of that ilk, furthering their own wealth while singing the right notes about democracy and the environment here in blue Ashlandia. He says he wants money out of politics but he supports politicians who make no moves to get money out of politics. He doesn’t think gun control can be done and supports Trump, who stands adamantly against gun control. In a 2022 Op-Ed piece, Alan DeBoer decried the state of our education system.

Education is not going in the right direction. Schools are separating students by beliefs. We have stopped teaching how to solve problems and suppress independent thinking while having less tolerance for opposing opinions. Shouldn’t we teach how to have a positive conversation while respecting different opinions?

Yet, he supports Trump. Trump, who champions a twisted form of Christianity while oppressing every other religion. DeBoer supports Trump even as Trump methodically attacks universities and colleges and dismantles the education system. DeBoer supports Trump even as Trump polarizes the voting body by viciously attacking anyone who disagrees with him, using the levers of government to suppress free speech and opposition. With Trump as their leader, the GOP is working hard to separate students by economic class and race through private vouchers. Trump tacitly supports this by not doing anything about it.

That is so Che Guevara, n’est pas?

Here is Sage’s post title for the DeBoer guest spot:

What if Trump isn’t Hitler?

What if he is more like Che Guevara, a revolutionary disrupter taking on entrenched elites on behalf of oppressed people?

I was simultaneously ready to howl with laughter at DeBoer’s incredibly inane premise, but sickened and disgusted. One DeBoer paragraph leaped out with its simplistic naiveite.

Decades from now, historians will look back and weigh not only Trump’s rhetoric but also his policies. Among these, his tax reform is likely to stand out. While critics often characterized it as a gift to corporations, the reality is that millions of lower- and middle-income households saw relief through reduced income tax rates, a doubled standard deduction, and expanded child tax credits. For working families, this meant more money in their paychecks and greater flexibility to support themselves — hardly the mark of a leader indifferent to ordinary citizens.

DeBoer’s piece brought out my Sarcastic Neurons. Why, sure, Alan, Trump is a liberator of ordinary citizens. That’s why he’s ignoring court rulings, right? Due process? That’s for the elites. Disappearing people off streets? That’s to make it better for the ‘oppressed’, right? Trying to end mail-in ballots, why that’s surely a good thing for the oppressed and democracy, isn’t it? Cause making it harder to vote and more difficult for your vote to be counted will clear the way for the oppressed. Trump is such a champion of the poor and oppressed, he’s cutting healthcare for them. Take that, elite evil doers!

And I’m absolutely sure that $200 child tax credit will go a long way to cope with rising prices that come from Trump’s combo of tariffs and trade wars.

Trump is whitewashing history. He and DeBoer must think that People of Color are part of the elites running things. Why, all those billionaires on the Trump’s cabinet are champions of the oppressed. That’s why they’re billionaires: they’re hoarding money to save oppressed people from having any. That’s ’cause these billionaires know that money is the root of all evil. They’re wealthy not for themselves but to save the rest.

That stuff about separation of church and state, and the idea that all people are created equal, all that’s just elitism offered by the original elitists, the nation’s founders. Yeah, I know, the founders were flawed individuals, too. Some of them had some damn good ideas, though, like protecting individual freedoms, instilling checks and balances to protect the government from itself, trying protect the nation from destruction that religions and bankers can cause. Trump’s actions are tearing down these protections. Alan, do you really think the oppressed will benefit from that?

Using troops against our own citizens is a clear Che Guevara move. Likewise, building new prisons like that pathetic Alligator Alcatraz in Florida. Trump makes fantastic claims about being a man of peace after he bombs another country and bloviates about ending ten wars without coherently explaining what conflicts or how he ended them. Meanwhile, he accused Ukraine of being the aggressor in their war with Russia, ignoring Russia’s attack and invasion, withheld funding from Ukraine for months, and hasn’t ended that war after boasting that he’d do in the first 24 hours of his administration.

DeBoer doesn’t address any of this behavior. Naturally, DeBoer says nothing about the growing inflation or the impact of the tariffs, or the cuts to the IRS, HHS, VA, Weather Service, or Parks Services, cuts which undermine the government’s ability to maintain and serve. DeBoer clearly views Trump’s activities through a narrow rose-colored prism that lets him see some things that Trump is doing as wonderful for the people, while filtering out all of the rest.

I don’t think that history will view Trump through that same prism.

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Satyrdaz Wandering Political Thoughts

The headline misled me.

Biggest-Ever Black Hole With Mass Of 36 Billion Suns Discovered: ‘Cosmic Behemoth’

Naturally, I thought this was a political piece. I thought surely that they were referring to the Greedy Old Trump Party, commonly shortened to GOTP, or the Trump Regime as the biggest-black hole ever.

The GOTP used to be known as the GOP, or the ‘Grand Old Party’. But under Trump’s squeamish, heavy-handed leadership, the spineless GOP has become a seething unprincipled black hole of greed and avarice. A place where they decry pedophiles while protecting pedophiles, where they scream that they’re pro-life as they turn their heads from children dying. Truth and facts go in and get bent out of shape into lies and falsehoods. History morphs into a lopsided retelling of all the great things which white men did. The black hole’s idealogical forces twists intelligent discourse into childish mouthings.

The GOTP black hole is a time portal, trying to push the world back to a pretend time, which they fantasize was better for all because white men were in charge, and all knew and understood. They liked that time because industry and commerce were not hamstrung by regulations to keep employees, or air, water, and the earth safe. Only two sexes were recognized, and only one was respected. The weaker, fairer sex, aka ‘the female’, known to be emotionally charged and weak of mind, was conditioned to accept their place in the bedroom and in the kitchen, staying home to raise more slave labor. Other sexual choices were kept in the closet, done in darkness, never to be spoken of in daylight. Abuse of others was allowed as long as the perpetrator was wealthy, white, and male, or dutifully mouthed the appropriate platitudes and respected the power structure. Religion was settled as a Christian thing with malleable morality and loudly stated and often ignored values. Do your sentence at church every Sunday and feed your local house of worship some gold and trinkets and your soul was saved, freeing you for Saturday night debauchery and business day cruelty. “Nothing personal,” are the words they like to use. “It’s just business.” Greed was blessed by God.

Blacks knew not to get too uppity. Browns kept quiet and stayed to their side of town, as did ‘the Asians’. If necessary, a little police violence could be used to keep them in their place and protect the white man’s place. Sure, it might lead to a little tension and soul searching in the aftermath, but it could all be swept away by the whites, because they were writing history. Then all would be good again.

As for the rest, the poor and sick, put them to work in the fields and factories. Slave labor keeps prices down and profit margins up. Children are the best little workers because they’re too young and ignorant to protest or complain. They eat less so they can be paid less. Let them ‘pull themselves up with their own bootstraps’. Hard work is good for the soul.

Make a profit off every piece of human suffering and indignity. That’s what comes out of the Trump Regime black hole. Plate it with gold to make it shiny and increase its value. Only gold has value, you know.

That’s the Trump Regime. I don’t care what science declares. Trump and the GOTP don’t, so why should I? So I reiterate my position: the Trump Regime is the biggest black hole ever known. It’s the biggest black hole in the Universe. Hitler and his NAZIs, and several other dictators, have been close, but Trump is just getting started with his attacks on logic, humanity, science, education, history, and decency. He’ll prove that he’s the greatest, most beautiful black hole ever.

What’s most sickening is that Trump and the MAGAts think that’s the most wonderful title that can be won because their world has become so perverse and irrational. Sure, a few are learning otherwise that it’s not as great as they expected in episodes christianed FAFO, or ‘The Leopard Ate My Face’. But most MAGAts are so far into the black hole that truth, empathy, education, facts, and science can no longer reach them.

Maybe that’ll change someday, after the black hole turns on itself and is finally gone.

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Wenzdaz Wandering Political Thoughts

It’s the age of betrayal, it’s the era of MAGA. Trump demands loyalty but will instantly betray anyone who sullies his self-image of magnificence.

That idea that he demands personal loyalty means nothings to his regime. They’re true to him, and that’s it. So, with little surprise, I read that FEMA probationary employees are being reshuffled to ICE.

I can imagine how that’s going down. FEMA interviewee: “Yes, I want to join FEMA and help my fellow citizens recover when disaster strikes. I want to comfort and reassure them, and help them rebuild.”

“Okay, we’re sending you to ICE.”

“ICE?”

“Yes. Here’s your mask and gun. Go round up brown people.”

“Brown people? That’s not legal.”

“Don’t worry about it. Just arrest them and let Trump sort them out.”

Apparently, *ahem* this personnel action is being taken because the Trump Regime is struggling to fill its ICE ranks. Rounding up citizens is labor intensive, especially on the scale that Trump envisions. Word around the coffee shops is that ICE is also paying hiring bonuses.

It occurs to me that this might be a good way to resist the Trump Regime. Join ICE, take the money, and then start sabotaging it from within. When intel about a raid comes available, broadcast it to apps to let people know that it’s coming so they can scatter and hide while protestors establish a cover force of protests and harassements.

While I write all this in a blend of seriousness and jest, I find it sad and disturbing that Trump and the GOP have formulated such an atmosphere that such thinking must exist.

Trump has proven to be the greatest at taking things and thoroughly enshittifying them. He is, in essence, the Enshittifier in Chief.

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Wenzdaz Theme Music

Very cool morning and not hurrying to warm up. This is a cloud’s influence, a cloud offering gray dimples and wavy white lines but otherwise lords the sky from east to west and the other way too. We’re offering 67 F with an 87 F high in the works. Although you can’t tell from this weather, it’s summer, August 6, 2025. More like sumfall. It is also Wenzda. Hump day. Mid week.

Trump is still being chased by the Epstein Files. That’s no good for other countries. Tariff Man has donned his towel and tied it around his neck so he can pretend it’s a cape. Now he’s zapping other countries with tariffs. Zap, 50% on India. Kapowie, 39% on Switzerland. Boom, 250% on pharmas. Maybe. Depends on how well it deflects attention from Epstein. Right now, tariffs are sucking oxygen.

Epstein is still out there, though. “Will no one rid me of this plague?” Trump cries out in his thin, reedy voice.

“Sorry, my lord,” he’s already dead,” Bondi replies. “We would if we could, believe me.”

Scowling, Trump sucks on a can of Mexican Coke. A smirking glare wins his expression. “Increase Canada’s tariffs. That’ll teach them.”

In case you forgot, here’s a picture of BFFs, Epstein and Trump.

This is one of my favorite Kinks songs. Admittedly, I have several. I enjoy this one’s opening lyrics. “Hello, you. Hello, me. Hello people we used to be. Isn’t it strange, we never change. We’ve been through it all yet we’re still the same.” I’m not sure what personal reflections I was working on at the time. summI was in the kitchen, doing the standard AM kitchen tasks. The Neurons picked up on my thoughts and into the morning mental music stream came Ray and Dave and the band with “A Rock ‘n’ Roll Fanasy” out of 1978.

A drip of coffee has turned into a sip which became a gulp. Time to jump out there. Hope peace and grace visits you and stays a while. Cheers

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Twosdaz Wandering Political Thoughts

Sean Duffy, acting interim pretend director of NASA, wants to ‘expedite plans’ to put a nuclear reactor on the Moon. This is probably because, as everyone who has ever seen the numbers on space programs, sending people and equipment to the Moon is incredibly cheap right now, thanks to Trump’s tariffs. Also, thanks to Trump’s tariffs and the beautiful revenue flowing in to the Treasury, more money than anyone has ever seen at one time. The deficit will drop by 1500% overnight, so the U.S. will have more money to spend than ever imagined.

They also want to launch a new U.S. space station. With Trump’s love of gold, I’d expect the interior to be lavishly bedecked with gold plated pieces, including a gold plated toilet. He’ll probably want it named for hisself, so the regime will be launching the the Donald J. Trump Space Station. Melania Trump, who is a genius, as everyone knows (she married Trump!), will emerge from her seclusion to design the new space suits. Trump Space Industries will manufacture them (in China, of course). They will have tags which say, “Made in the U.S.A.”

Cost overruns will beset the project. So will schedule problems and delays because other countries which have the needed materials and manufacturing resources dropped the U.S. as a trading partner. Seeing the numbers, TACO will growl, “You’re fired,” replacing the project director with someone more familiar with Trump math, such as a Fox News anchor, or one of his personal lawyers. “Give me a Sharpie,” the Donald will bark, and then he’ll fix the numbers with a Sharpie, as he’s prone to do. (You should see the Sharpie markups of his personal Trump Bible!) He’ll tell us about his uncle, who was a professor at M.I.T., and tell us how his uncle taught him everything anyone knows about space and space travel back in 1980.

Trump will call it the big beautiful space mission, the most beautiful mission ever in the history of the world, the very, very greatest space mission ever. Grossly overloaded with gold, corrupted by Trump math, forced to use substitute products, the gold-plated Trump Rocket won’t clear the gantry and collapse on the launch pad. Comedians and social media will overflow with a comic Trump failure to launch meme.

“It’s Biden’s fault,” Trump will shriek, and order everyone to start talking about something other than the rocket launch failure. A text will fly across Trump social media. “The lying scum democrat Deep State led by lying Newsom and KAMALA HARRIS and Barack HUSSEIN Obama did this to me because they don’t want to Make America Great Again. THIS WILL NOT STOP US. WE WILL BUILD THE BEST ROCKETS AMERICA HAS EVER SEEN AND THEY CAN’T STOP US. Thank you for your attention to this matter.”

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Satyrdaz Theme Music

More bunder thusters prowled Ashlandia’s late afternoon and early evening. Less sprinkles than you’d find on a doughnut fell, too. But Satyrda, August 2, 2025, has awakened in our area as sun-filled blue skies. A 67 F temperature now is expected to climb into the top 80s. A check of the fire watch and fire warning systems shows no new lightning-started fires in southern Oregon and northern California, knock wood, once again.

We’re flabbergasted in our household about economics surprised by the ‘weaker-than-expected’ jobs numbers and manufacturing decline. “Gasp,” economists said. “Unemployment has gone up again. Less people are employed. Who would have believed that would happen after Trump terminated all those Federal jobs? Just because tourism is down because less people are traveling to the United States due to ICE shouldn’t affect jobs, should it? And I don’t think the shuttering of automobile factories, even temporarily due to material shortages and tariffs, would affect job numbers. I wonder what’s going on?” Those economics should consider relocating their offices from under those rocks.

This was another household laugher of a headline: RFK Jr. says cancer screenings are too ‘woke’ now. WTF does that word mess even mean? The Trump Regime continues toward new lows in coherency.

A second laugher came in the FAFO variety: Trump voter livid after being profiled by ICE: ‘I’m an American who now has to be afraid’. It was again a brown voter who thought Trump would go after those ‘other’ brown people, the bad ones, and not them.

Finally, more FAFO is being reported in Iowa. ‘Tidal wave on our hands’: Furious voters say Trump’s turning key red state purple. The first paragraph claims, “Angry voters in Iowa could turn the state from solid red to a swing state because they feel betrayed by President Donald Trump on issues from healthcare to agriculture.”

A large part of that is that farmers felt betrayed by Trump urging Coca Cola to make Coke with cane sugar only for sale in the U.S., what is often referred to as ‘Mexican Coke’ because they use cane sugar to make Coke in Mexico. The Iowa farmers grow corn; corn syrup was being used in Coke production. So there goes their market. As usual, Trump shows how naive and short-sighted he is, how disconnected from reality, or he would have known of the connection between corn syrup and American farmers. But he’s too damn painfully lacking of the brain cells needed to comprehend these things. Since he’s installed only ‘yes’ people who kowtow to him, he won’t hear anyone explain the relationship between corn, farmers, Coke, and sugar to him. Or, as likely, he’ll shrug and say with his ’empathy’, “They’ll get over it.”

Jill Dennison started a chain the other day. She played a Foreigner song on her blog. I countered with some other Foreigner song. Ark chimed in with another Foreigner song, “Urgent”. Ark mentioned the sax, and the album, Four or 4. That was a fine damn album and it was added to the rotation for a while at my house after it was released. Now The Neurons have run with that, of course, playing “Urgent” and other Foreigner songs from the album in the morning mental music stream. I’m afraid that means that I must share the song with you to stop The Neurons from playing it in my head. I’m sorry, but those are the rules. I didn’t create them; I just live by them.

May peace and grace find you today. Maybe some fun, too. Here we go. Cheers

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Munda’s Wandering Political Thoughts

Trump wants a Peace Prize. I believe him worthy of winning an Ig Nobel Peace Prize this year.

As a man of peace, he has successfully orchestrated a roundup of violent people in the United States. These people were in the U.S. posing as farmworkers, housewives, day laborers, food plant workers, mothers, fathers, and children. Using the Trump branded ESP called TSP*, his minions swept up violent criminals who are illegally in the United States by using just the power of their nose to sniff out crime before it takes place. Most amazingly, with TSP, Trump’s ICE agents are capable of identifying child criminals just by their skin color. To buttress his need for Peace, Trump had the amazing Peace Confinement Base built in Florida. After befriending alligators, Trump trained the alligators to peacefully guard the Peace Confinement Base. Unfortunatly, evil opponents to Trump’s peace efforts use that fact to malign the place as “Alligator Alcatraz”.

Trump will do anything for peace. Searching for peace between Russia and Ukraine, he humbly employed his amazing skills at changing the past to show that Ukraine was the aggressor in that war and urged their leader to accept those new facts at any cost to win peace.

Trump’s third stake in the running for the Ig Noble Peace Prize is his use of America’s military force to launch a pre-emptive strike on Iran, bravely ignoring his own military intelligence’s insights and assessments of Iran to do so. In doing so, Trump modestly noted, “Might makes right, and we have the rightest military in the world.”

Finally, Trump deserves consideration for repetitive efforts to bring peace to others in the world by bringing them under his Umbrella of Peace**. This includes violently afflicted hellholes such as the barbarous and backwards New York City, the swamp of killing named Canada, the miasma of murder known as Greenland, and the Panama Canal.

Surely Trump’s words and behaviors have earned him the right to stand before the world and accept an Ig Noble Peace Prize.

Trump has won an Ig Nobel before, for his bold influence on medical science in 2020 after the COVID-19 pandemic began. He shared that prize with many others, though, who offered the same sort of impact on life in that trying period. I believe the time has come for D.J. Trump to stand alone and get recognition for his impact on peace.

Unfortunately, he will not win. The Ig Noble Prizes are satirical and made to make people laugh and think. There is at once too much and nothing to laugh about with Trump, and none of it is satirical.

But if he doesn’t win, surely a billionaire friend will create the Trump Peace Prize in his honor and make him the first recipient. Then they’ll need to retire the prize. Nobody else can ever be worthy. Unless they offer enough money.

*TSP: Trump Special Power

**Trump brand gold-plated Umbrella of Peace is available online for $25,000. Autographed editions are available for an additional $5,000. Order yours fast, as supplies are limited to the first 47 people. Made in China. Not subject to tariffs. Not available to Democrats or Liberals. All sales are final.

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