Mar-A-Floofgo

Mar-A-Floofgo (floofinition) – Literally, ‘sea of floofs’, a mythical place among housefloofs where everything can be scratched, destroyed, or knocked over, and be magically repaired overnight; where treats fall from the skies like rain and animals can eat as much as they want; where cans are always being opened, bacon, steak, cheese, and chicken, are always being served, where food and water bowls are never empty, and your favorite person is always there to play or cuddle. Origins: “The Live Floof Scrolls”, a set of hundreds of scrolls of ancient floof prophecies and histories, recovered between 1946 and 1956 from Floofrum Cave, and since partially translated.

In Use: “Many people see their pet floofs moving in their sleep, limbs twitching, eyes flickering, and think that they’re ‘chasing a rabbit’ but other floofs know that the animals are often visting Mar-A-Floofgo through the floof portal.” — excerpt from “Through the Floof Portal”, 1871.

August 10, 2025 4

Acfloofpuncture

Acfloofpuncture (floofinition) – Floofese practice of inserting claws into skin to cure disease, relieve pain, incur relaxation, or for amusement. Origins: 1784, Flooftin.

In Use: “Snuggles was rapidly demonstrating herself as an acfloofpuncture specialist, sinking claws into every piece of human skin offered her.”

August 3, 2025 5

Floofgonist

Floofgonist (floofinition) – An animal involved in a struggle. Origins: 1658, France & Floofland.

In Use: “As soon as Quinn spotted a spider, he became a floofgonist in a battle to vanquish the eight-legged foe, even though said foe scared the hell out of him, causing Quinn to spring backward when the spider moved his way.”

July 30, 2025 0

Floofologica

Floofologica (floofinition) – Inability to rememember a name or term associated with animals. Origins: 1970s United States.

In Use: “One struggle with caring for Sybil’s pets for her while Sybil was on vacation was Chloe’s floofologica. Of the three cats, two dogs, and single bird, the only one whose name she recalled was the bird’s, Amber, because her favorite drinking beverage was amber ale.”

July 19, 2025 2

Flooftotum

Flooftotum (floofinition) – An animal who does multiple kinds of work. Origins: Flooftin, mid-16th century.

In Use: “Chase, a new household addition, quickly revealed herself to be a flooftotum, a true floof-of-all-trades, overseeing baths, dusting, making the bed, sorting laundry, cooking, and eating, in addition to providing security by keeping the yard free of other critters and issuing warnings about interlopers.”

July 18, 2025 0

Sectflooferian

Sectflooferian (floofinition) – Limited to information or activities related to animals. Origins: 1819, Northeastern United States.

In Use: “After another kitten was added to the household, the patio was screened in and became a sectflooferian lounging area for the cats, dogs, and birds, with several feeding stations, beds, sofas, chairs, boxes, and artificial trees set up for the floofs’ exclusive use.”

July 17, 2025 1

Floofsy

Where is the fur

Where is the purr

Where is the regarding gaze

Maybe out in the sun

Somewhere having fun

Or resting in some shade

Then he arrives

Taking me by surprise

Leaping onto my lap

To tell his news

Through chirps and mews

It’s my buddy, my fur friend, my cat

July 11, 2025 3

The Usual Places

The usual places are empty

Our air is still

No soft noises are heard

None are there for a treat or a pill.

Toys are collected and put away

Wondering if they’ll be needed on another day.

Food bowls are cleaned, beds are washed,

Unopened food is given away,

The others are tossed.

Quiet shadows every motion and move

You think of memories

Which help and soothe.

But the faces remain, always there

In the empty space, an empty chair.

July 8, 2025 0

Floofments

Floofments (floofinition) – Garments or articles of clothing used when engaging with animals. Origins: First known use, late 20th century, United States (South Carolina).

In Use: “Whenever something had to be done with Rolex (named for the way he watched) like administering medicine, giving Rollie a bath or clipping nails was pursued, Sue and Andi first donned well-worn floofments — essentially heavily used older clothing no longer worn in public and thick gloves — to protect their bodies.”