Floofnado

Floofnado (floofinition) – 1. Whirlwinds or wind devils caused by the passage of a speedy, energetic animal.

In use: “Quiet conversations about the upcoming wedding were disrupted by a floofnado as the dog rocketed into the room, dashed around, evading a child chasing it, and sprinted back out of the room.”

2. A wind-based weather phenomena with an animal embedded in it.

In use: “One of the most famous examples of floofnado was a waterspout which had captured several sharks, becoming known as a sharknado.”

February 6, 2020 2

Rushed

Catering to his beloved pet’s needs, he opened the back door for his ginger feline. “Go on, then. I’m telling you, it’s freezing out there. You’ll be sorry. You’ll want back in after a few minutes.”took

Despite sunshine, icy air was rushing through the open door. Tail up, the cat bounced forward with a posture that called forth a heroic flourish of trumpets.

Halfway out, the cat went still, paws caught in motion.

“In or out,” he snapped. “Come on, cold air is filling the house, and all the heat is getting out.” He could hear the furnace kicking on. “Damn it — ”

The cat chittered. An enormous scrub jaw was hopping about the icy grass. Apparently seeing the cat, it flapped it wings with an outraged screech and took flight.

The cat ran out but the bird was gone. The cat scowled back at the man with an irritated tail swish (oh, yes, cats can scowl). He was clearly saying, “I could have gotten him if you hadn’t rushed me.”

“Right,” the man replied with a dismissing snort. “That bird was bigger than you. Let me know when you want back in.” He closed the door as the cat walked away, tall up, all forgiven, searching the yard for another distraction.

December 28, 2019 2

Parafloofx

Parafloofx (floofinition) – 1. A pair of animals, i.e., floof. A parafloofx is worth two in the bush. 2. An animal having seemingly contradictory qualities or phases.

In use: “As many people who shared a house with cats learned, they were often parafloofxes, presenting their bellies for a little sweet lovin’, purring away before suddenly activating bite and claw mode.”

December 3, 2019 1

Floofhold

Floofhold (floofinition) –

1. A tenuous grasp on a housepet.

2. A housepet’s tenous grip on an object.

3. Delaying an event or an activity due to a housepet’s situation or location.

In use: “He wanted to vacuum the house, but, not wanting to disturb the sleeping cats and dogs, was forced into a floofhold.”

January 28, 2019 0

Floofeiture

Floofeiture (floofinition) – the loss or giving up of something to a pet, most often in reference to furniture, but also used in connection with food.

In use: “Finally admitting the he needed to get up to pee, he reluctantly did so, knowing that doing so meant floofeiture to one of the animals waiting to take his seat. If he had to bet on it, he would say the corgi would win.”

October 19, 2018 2

Flooflaw

Flooflaw (floofinition) – a house pet who contemptuously believes themselves above household rules; an animal scofflaw.

In use: “Household flooflaws broke into the cupboard and raided the treats and kibbles, leaving empty bags behind.”

September 12, 2018 3

Infloofarable

Infloofarable (catfinition) – two or more cats or dogs incapable of being separated or disjoined.

In use: “Taffy the blind cat and Bettina became infloofarable after getting to know each other.”

August 4, 2018 0

Whiskercise

Whiskercise (catfinition) – an exercise program popular among house pets, especially cats, made popular by Miz Jane, a calico cat, in the 1980s. Whiskercise focuses on leisurely stretching when standing up, long naps, and sudden but short bursts of activity.

In use: “Devotees of whiskercise like to spring up and dash forward for several feet before stretching and settling down for a new nap. According to the whiskercise protocol, this enhances the cat’s natural beauty and increases longevity. Some whiskercise proponents have claimed to live more than nine lives, with one, a one hundred twenty-one year old tortie, claiming to have lived twelves lives.”

July 25, 2018 0

Floofherent

Floofherent (catfinition) – cat logic (also sometimes applied to dogs).

In use: “By the pet’s floofherent process, it made complete sense that when food was put on the table, some of it belonged to her as well as the people. After all, wasn’t she a part of the family?”