Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofpaper (floofinition) – 1. Essay, blog post, circular, or information site focused on information pertaining to animals.
In use: “Perhaps inspiring greater interest in animals and their treatment and rights, many digital floofpapers have sprung up on the net.”
2. A paper put down for an animal’s use, or taken over by an animal.
In use: “Many people discover that as soon as they open a newspaper on the table or floor, a pet — especially a cat — will turn it into a floofpaper.”
Restless Floof Syndrome (floofinition) – Condition where an animal, especially a pet, is bored and ends up prowling and wandering, as if it has too much energy and nothing to do.
In use: “Restless floof syndrome struck the young animal. He knew he didn’t want to go outside, where wind and rain ruled, but eating bored him and he had too much energy to sleep. He had to do something or he would go nuts.”
Rafloofment (floofintion) – The establishment or resumption of harmonious relations between animals.
In use: “Rafloofment often begins with sniffing, and many animals sniff one another’s rear as a significant step in rafloofment.”
Coflooferation (floofinition) – The actions of animals who are being helpful by taking actions to help one another.
In use: “After surviving the trails of the hurricane, coflooferation was rampant as animals huddled together regardless of species, thankful to be alive and with another.”
Floofcifist (floofinition) – Someone (person or animal) who supports animals and animals rights and equality.
In use: “Corky the cat had somehow become a floofcifist, and insisted that each cat and dog receive equal treat, enforcing her opinion with quick swats from her right paw. Nancy soon called that paw, “Corky’s right paw of justice”. Equally respecting and fearing the right paw of justice, the other animals soon accepted Corky’s position.”
Floofstriction (floofintion) 1. Limitations imposed by living with an animal.
In use: “Floofstrictions included being careful where he stepped (hairballs might have been distributed in the night) and the standard order of morning activity; after using the bathroom to void his bladder, feeding the furry ones was job one, ‘cuz they were going to campaign for food until he did.”
2. Rules for what animals, particularly housepets, are allowed do do.
In use: “She imposed floofstrictions: no sleeping on the sofa or easy chairs, no stealing food from plates, no drinking water from the toilet or people’s glasses, floofstrictions which were routinely broken. “Why do I bother?” she always lamented. “Yes, why?” the pets, husband, and children agreed.”
Flooftherin (floofintion) – An animal whose species doesn’t normally travel on its belly who likes sliding on its belly.
In use: “One daily game indulged with the dog was to indulge his desire to be a flooftherin. As he lay on his belly on the hardwood floors, the children push him around with a broom.”
Clairfloofance (floofinition) – Animals’ power to perceive what people are doing, no matter the animals’ state or the human’s location.
In use: “Waiting until the cats were asleep and snoring, Michael quietly arose, went outside and began yard work, thinking the cats wouldn’t be bothering them, because they were asleep. He’d forgotten about their clairfloofance.”
Infloofticize (floofinition) – To entice an animal with objects, words, motion, or food.
In use: “Wanting the cat to come to her, she inflooftized the message by kissing noises and calling him, tapping on the floor as she did, and then brought out the catnip. With a yawn and a stretch, he jogged over to check it out.”
Floofkade (floofinition) (origins: Alberta, Canada) – 1. Effort to cut off another animal from a particular area by force or threat of force.
In use: “The kitten began eating and immediately put up a floofkade with his paws on the bowl and several growls and yowls as he chewed.”
2. Effort, typically through fencing or objects, to keep animals segregated.
In use: “The dogs were floofkaded in separate kennels, but one dog figured out how to open us, and soon, he’d lifted the floofkade by single-pawedly opening all the cages.”
Michael Seidel, writer 