Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
A friend posted on FB about her clothes getting stuck on door handles. Another responded, “their way of telling you to slow down and reflect”.
That nudged my mind into singing, “Slow down, you move too fast. You got to make the morning last.”
Then Simon & Garfunkel began performing “The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin’ Groovy)” from 1971. I’m sharing it with you to dislodge it from my mind. Please sing along.
Please.
Black Eyed Floofs (floofinition) – Floof hop group formed in Los Floofgelos in 1995. Although significant success wasn’t achieved until their third album in 2003, they have become one of the best-selling floof groups of all time and performed at Superfloof XLV in 2011.
In use: “The Black Eyed Floofs’ song, “Boom Boom Paw” was the group’s first number one, followed by “I’ve Gotta Itchy”, spent fourteen weeks at number one in the Floofnited States, both in 2009.”
My sitcom dreams continued last night. In one, I was with a coven of witches. Although we met in a dim environment where wine and munchies were being served, we were all ordinary-looking people in jeans and casual wear. Maybe it was casual day for witches.
I was there to be taught. Most of the dream is too low res for faithful recollection but at one point, I had an epiphany. This was during the curses portion of the training. When they were being revealed to me, I was privy for a moment of curses that’d been used recently. And there was a surprise. I saw the first snap of the Steelers-Brown playoff game, the fiasco on which the Browns scored a defensive touchdown and unleashed a scoring tsunami. “Oh my God. The Steelers were cursed. That’s why they lost them to the Browns. Who cursed them?”
‘Who’ wasn’t revealed, but I laughed about it in my dream. Part of me even speculated, oh, wishful thinking by my subconscious.
Though I’ve thought about it, nothing deeper ever emerged. I have just that one lasting impression: the Steelers were cursed.
On Wednesday, I mentioned a couple of my recent dreams to my wife. She shook her head; “You’re on another plan with those dreams. I have no idea what’s going on.”
Yeah, I often have that feeling about my dreams, but many of them reassure and inspire me. Not so the dreams of Wednesday and Thursday nights. Of the silly variety, I call them my sitcom dreams. Along with what I call my ‘episodic adventure dreams’, the sitcom dreams happen regularly. There’s always a string of them. Although they amuse me, I rarely post about them.
For example, one dream last night had me attempting to feed two cats. The cats in question were Jade and Quinn. Quinn died two years ago after being with us for twelve years. Jade came to us on Okinawa and was with us for twenty-one years. Both were sweethearts, although Jade was furiously intelligent and willful.
In the dream, I was trying to feed these two in my backyard. I had a food bowl set up for them but they were crowding me, giving me the impression they were hungry. Naturally, I talked to them about it.
“Why are you asking me for food. There’s plenty of food in your bowl. Come on, I’ll” I led through the yard’s lush green grass back to their food bowl. “See?” I pointed. They hurried to their food bowl, sniffing, then turned to me in question. Puzzled, I went to the food bowl. Closer to it, I discovered that what I thought was cat kibble was sandwich wedges. Checking them out with surprise, I discovered they were stale.
“Sorry,” I told the cats. “Let me clean this up and then I’ll give you real food.”
As I was cleaning, putting the stale sandwiches to one side, a man and his family — neighbors — passed by, watching me as they went. I heard the father say to the rest, “He is burying the cats’ feces.” I smiled when I heard him but didn’t clarify what was going on.
That’s where that one ended. See what I mean? There were six or seven of these sort of dreams, about cars, technology, cats, and houses. While I take humor from them, I do acquire some deeper insights about myself from the sitcom dreams. I might be rationalizing what happens but I like it. Still, I’m looking forward to a return my normal dream programming.
I can always use reassuring.
Flooftivist (floofinition) 1. Animal who protests how animals (including itself) are being treated or kept.
In use: “Jade was a flooftivist from an early age, conducting sit-ins and lie-ins against unreasonable rules, such as ‘don’t take food off plates’ and ‘don’t get on the kitchen counter’.”
2. A person who uses or supports strong actions (such as public protests) in support of animal rights or against animal abuse.
In use: “With the surge of information on the web came increasing evidence and awareness that animals have more intelligence and experience more emotions that previously accepted, generating more flooftivists from earlier ages and more areas of the world.”
He’s laying at my feet,
soft, black, and sweet.
Some scoff, he’s just a cat.
He looks at me and purrs,
and I stroke his velvet fur
as some sniff, “Isn’t he a little fat?”
But I don’t care and I don’t shift,
not even for an itch,
because I like it, where he’s at.
Even if he is, as they all say.
really,
just a cat.
Sometime in the future.
“We’re still awaiting results. The past is changing, but the results are still coming in.”
“More importantly, we still exist.”
Murmurs of agreement went around the gathering; the general consensus before they’d begun this endeavor was the greatest proof that they’d succeeded in the past was that the party didn’t exist in the present.
A west coast reps was the Planning Committee Chair. Calling for order, she continued with her report. “We unleashed COVID-19 at the end of 2019. Sadly, but as predicted, this had the desired impact. Travel was reduced, leading to less armed conflicts as division between neo-fascists and the rest grew. Many refused to wear masks, as predicted.” She gave a nod toward another rep, who briefly beamed in acknowledgement. “The economy suffered as the working poor had their incomes cut by substantial amounts, leading to dissatisfaction that guaranteed Trump would lose the 2020 election. A vaccine was found, with limited impact, also as predicted. Likewise, Trump’s administration failed to plan ahead, as predicted.”
Rep. Bacon, Chair of Predictions, said, “They’re egregiously predictable, which makes for the situation of that time even more unfathomable. They’d consistently demonstrated no concern for human life or welfare, eschewing all principles in favor of increasing personal wealth among the wealthiest. It doesn’t make sense. It — “
“It is human nature,” said the Human Nature Chair. “Let’s not have another polemic.”
“Also predictable,” another rep called to a brief burst of chuckling.
The Planning Committee Chair resumed. “COVID-19 variants have been introduced as we speak. Given the failures to wear masks, plan for proper vaccination in advance, resistance to and distrust of vaccinations, and rallies and protests on behalf of the defeated president, a surge in cases and deaths will be seen in 2021.”
“But will that be enough?” another rep asked.
All eyes turned toward the Chair of Predictions. He pursed his lips. “We don’t know. It remains to be seen.” He put a hand up. “That’s not meant as a joke. If it doesn’t have the desired impact, well…we do have greater variants lined up.”
Thoughtful silence reigned for several seconds. “Is the asteroid still in play?” a rep asked.
The Chair of Predictions nodded. “Yes, but we’re holding onto it as our trump card.” He grimaced. “No joke intended, again.”
“So it won’t be deployed until…?”
“That’s right,” the Chair of Predictions said. “Twenty twenty-four.” He bleakly smiled. “If needed.”
Equifloofable (floofinition) – Agreeable to all animals.
In use: “When it came to laps, finding equifloofable sitting arrangements for a household with five dogs, six cats, and four humans resulted in some crowded sofas, chairs, and laps.”
Established Floof (floofinition) – 1. An elderly animal.
In use: “She preferred adopting established floofs from shelters, having found that such animals are often sweet and loving, and too-frequently overlooked.”
2. An animal who already is in residence when people arrive.
In use: “As economic situations force people to unexpectedly move, more people moving into homes and apartments find that established animals are awaiting them.”
3. Animals controlling a home before other animals arrive.
In use: “Although the established floof included several large dogs, the little kitten had them eating out of her paw within days and soon ruled the house pack.”
Floofergenic (floofinition) – Animal state of having a high desire to do something but not having any outlet, resulting in restless noisemaking and prowling.
In use: “The cats and dogs had become floofergenic, meowing and barking, demanding attention, insisting someone play with them or pay attention to them!”
