humor – Page 163 – Michael Seidel, writer

Floofvision (floofinition) – 1. An added layer of telecommunications visible and audible to animals but beyond human comprehension.

In use: “Boo and Oliver enjoy sitting by the television, watching floofvision, which brings them up-to-date infloofmation about animals, new floofnology, and general enterfloofment.”

2. Formally, an organization founded by a woman to end animal abuse.

In use: “Raven tells everyone everywhere, whomever and wherever she meets them, about Floofvision and her goal of a world free of animal abuse. Humans are starting to pay attention, but the animals are beginning to flock toward her as a new Floofsiah.”

Floofship (floofinition) – 1. A title of respect used to address an animal of regal manner or high standing.

In use: “Three cats shared the home with four days but only one cat was always addressed as ‘Your Floofship’ in recognition of her status within the floofhold.”

2. The state of affectionate companionship between animal and human, or between two or more animals.

In use: “Jennifer’s children had grown and begun their own families, and she’d been twice divorced, but now she found floofship with her dog, Uhtred, to be a most rewarding experience.”

3. A vessel or conveyance animals use to travel.

In use: “Every new moon, a floofship landed on Earth, delivering new animals to the planet, and taking others away for those ready to leave. So it had been since the first dinosaurs used a floofship to leave when they learned an asteroid was going to hit Earth over sixty-six million years ago.”