Kibble Balance

Kibble Balance (floofinition) – The extremely precise quantity and kind of food an animal, especially a housepet, deems acceptable. The Kibble Balance exists on a spectrum known only to animals and is thought by humans to constantly fluctuate. Such fluctuation vexes humans’ ability to feed animals.

In use: “The cats just loved the new grain free kibble Michael provided them but abruptly turned their noses up to it on the third day, when changes to the Kibble Balance shifted their interest in the that food.”

July 25, 2022 0

Monday’s Wandering Thought

In a true WTF moment, he reached up and back to scratch the top of his back. His fingers found a round, flat object. Poker chip? That’s what it felt like but how and why it was there was a mystery.

It wasn’t a poker chip; it was a U.S. quarter.

There had been a U.S. quarter stuck to his back. Really, WTF?

July 25, 2022 0

Saturday’s Wandering Thought

Right-handed, when he put his socks and shoes on, he always did the left foot first. He wondered, has this ever been studied? Was a correlation between dominant hands and which foot you did first? A natural relationship was suggested but has it been studied? Did it need to be studied?

July 23, 2022 0

Psychosweet

Psychosweet (floofinition) – Floof expression for an animal who is alternatively very sweet, relaxed, and friendly, and then outrageously crazy, aggressive, and energetic.

In use: “Thomas and his family fostered three kittens — Wendy, Tootles, and Mongo — and soon discovered they were psychosweets.”

July 22, 2022 3

Friday’s Wandering Thought

Every once in a while, not enough to be predicted, his cat meowed like he was Jimmy Durante imitating a cat.

Here’s a taste of Jimmy Durante’s voice for a point of reference.

July 22, 2022 0

Floofscaping

Floofscaping (floofinition) – Arranging a space to be more animal friendly.

In use: “Floofios such as catios and pupios are becoming more prevalent floofscaping features as people take action to give their fur friends safe access to fresh air and sunshine.”

July 21, 2022 0

The Writing Moment

“You overthink things,” the muses said.

“Guilty.”

“Don’t. Trust us. Write and enjoy yourself.”

The writer sniffed, a response delivered with a tincture of hurt indignation. “Easy for you to say.”

A muse sighed. “Easier for you to do, if you’ll let yourself.”

Sure, the writer thought. Sure.

July 21, 2022 0

Tuesday’s Wandering Thought

He took his socks off in the office, balled them up and set them on the desk.

His partner had done the laundry earlier. A few hours later, she walked in and tossed a pair of socks on the bed. Seeing them, he put them away in his sock drawer. It was only when he went to put on his socks and shoes to walk up and check the mail did he realize what had happened.

July 19, 2022 1

The Writing Moment

He kept quiet as he typed, making as little noise as possible. Muses had turned out in a large number and were offering terrific guidance. He didn’t want to scare them off.

July 19, 2022 0

High Floof

High Floof (floofinition) – 1. In the Floofodoxy Church, the High Floof is the floofiest position, responsible for ruling over other floofs regarding floof matters.

In use: “As the High Floof, Sammy interpreted what the humans were saying and told the other pets how to respond. None of the household pets ever did anything without Sammy’s sayso.”

2. An animal that habitually prefers a higher physical location.

In use: “While Misty was an underfloof, always at foot level, Mo was a high floof, jumping up onto the cat tree, irritating the felines with his canine presence.”