Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
He knew a brief history of pants and also read about plural tantum, but it still bothered him to hear underwear referred to ‘a pair of underwear’ or ask for ‘a pair of pants’. He had no problem with a pair of glasses although a pair of scissors irked him. For his own use, he’d quit referring to a ‘pair’ of any of these things.
He was just trying to pare things down to make life simpler.
He has his routines. After eating his wet food and his kibble, he heads for the desk. His guy is seated behind it, on the computer. There, on the right, is the man’s mouse, used for his computer, his hand resting on it. Eyeing it, he walks around the computer to the mouse hand, and puts his nose down and starts rubbing on his human’s hand. He usually only wants about two to three minutes of rubbing on the mouse hand before settling down for a nap, using the mouse hand as a pillow. That rarely works because the hand and mouse moves, eventually causing him to jump down to find another napping location. But all is well.
He’s had his morning mouse. It’ll suffice until after dinner. Then he’ll have his evening mouse.
A bear was spotted crossing Siskiyou Boulevard at 12:45 PM. He then went up Park Street. Naturally, everyone wondered, why did the bear cross the road? Yes, sure, it was to get to the other side, but why?
Floofspeed (floofinition) – A velocity achieved by animals when they seriously go after something, it’s never been successfully measured but has been estimated to be six billion times the speed of light.
In use: “When he dropped food on the floor, the dog was on it faster than floofspeed, no matter where it was dropped or where the dog was when it was dropped.”
It was mid-afternoon. He was walking fast down a steep street. Cars were parked on either side of the narrow street so when a car came up in the other way, he stepped aside to wait for them to pass.
The car slowed to a crawl.
He wondered if they were turning into a driveway and looked down to see what was happening.
The silver Honda pulled up beside him. A woman he didn’t know stared at him for a second and then powered down the window, laughing as she did. When the window was partly down, she said, “I’m sorry. I thought you were a bear.” Laughing again, he put her window up and went on.
He gazed up the street as the car climbed the hill, wondering, did she say bear?
Floofshadowing (floofinition) – Action, sound, or activity which indicates something to come.
In use: “The sounds coming from the bed’s foot was floofshadowing that a floof — probably the dog — was vomiting.”
Floof-à-floof (floofinition) From Floofish, literally one animal facing another.
In use: “Although the cats had ‘shared’ a home for literally seven years, every morning began with a floof-à-floof moment when they squared off in the hallway and yowled their darkest threats at one another as though facing the greatest threat ever.”
With some websites, no matter how he protects their cookies and clicks, “Remember Me” and “Keep me logged in”, he must always log in.
I’ve been under a barrage of dreams the last two nights. All of them have been as fleeting as me meteors on a summer night. One impression remains bold from one dream: I learned that Frank Sinatra was my father.
Bet that’ll be a surprise to Mom.
