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Raison d’floof (floofinition) – the reason or justification for having housepets
In use: “The latest addition was a kitten, which increased the housepet’s population to twelve, including the birds. Their raison d’floof was that the cat needed a home, and they could provide it.”
Floofjectory (floofinition) – a housepet’s path to chase a toy, another animal, or to be fed.
In use: “He knew from experience that the five cats’ floofjectories were intercept courses to cut him off, get around his legs, and rub against his calves and shins while meowing and purring until he changed directions and headed for their food.”
Imfloofure (floofinition) – to enclose with housepets as if within walls.
In use: “When he settled on the sofa in the sunshine for a nap, the kittens and puppies joined him until their furry bodies imfloofured him. It was the best nap he’d ever known.”
Floofliness (floofinition) – loneliness caused by being without the company of housepets; cut off from housepets.
In use: “The worse, for many fleeing the wildfire, was enduring the floofiness caused when they couldn’t get their pets out, and had to endure the disaster without the comfort the pets provided while waiting to see if their fur friends had survived.”
Inflooftrialised (floofinition) – to introduce housepets on a large scale.
In use: “Younger families moved in. The sounds and actions of playing young children filled the streets. The neighborhood became inflooftrialised with cats, dogs, birds, rabbits, hamsters, and guinea pigs.”
Gigafloof (floofinition) – a larger than normal housepet.
In use: “At six feet tall, Walter the Great Dane wasn’t nearly as big as Freddy the Great Dane who was the world’s largest dog, but Walter’s height definitely qualified him as a gigafloof.”
Flooftation (floofinition) – a quotation or reference about a housepet, such as a dog, cat, or fish.
In use: “A classic flooftation comes from Groucho Marx, who said, “Outside of a dog a book is man’s best friend because inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.””
Floofdial (floofinition) – refers to having a housepet. Postfloofdial refers to the period after pets leave the household, leaving the household without a pet, while prefloofdial refers to the time before a household ever acquires a pet.
In use: “With his beloved fur friend passed away, his home was no longer floofdial, but he wasn’t going to remain postfloofdial. He was certain fate would direct another fur friend his way, which is what he wanted. He didn’t think of his prefloofdial era with any fondness, for a home without a pet just wasn’t as warm and friendly.”
Floofciturn (floofinition) – housepets who are reserved and do little to communicate with others.
In use: “He said to his cat, “What’s the matter? Are you hungry? Do you want to go outside?” The floofciturn feline remained sitting where he was, watching the man like the cat had no idea who he was or what he was saying.”
Flooflumph (floofinition) – 1. (noun) a housepet’s movement with heavy tread. 2. (verb) (slang) a term used in reference to a clumsy housepet.
In use: “The big lab was such a flooflumph as a puppy, all paws and legs, thundering and crashing when he ran, that it was amazing to see him as a mature and majestic adult, trotting and sprinting with grace.”
Michael Seidel, writer 