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Floofjump (floofinition) – a non-competitive event where a housepet attempts to block another housepet or human, forcing the human or animal to jump over the blocking housepet.
In use: “Running late, he hurried, planning to feed the pets after he’d done a few preliminary tasks, but they, being hungry, rushed to block him whenever he turned, forcing him to floofjump more than once, transforming the house into a floofcourse.”
Floofback (floofinition) – feedback or information about reactions to a product, a performance, etc. which is used as a basis for improvement or change.
In use: “His cat enjoyed tummy rubs but gave fast floofback with sharp claws and a quick nip when the tummy-rub session should be ended.”
Floofverture (floofinition) – an approach by an animal, typically a housepet, for assistance.
In use: “Many unhomed canine mothers made floofvertures to people they could trust to help them with their puppies.”
Heftyfloof (floofinition) – a pet which is large boned or has a thick, fluffy coat of fur, giving it an appearance of being larger that it is.
In use: “He was a heftyfloof, with a silver and gray coat that radiated out, but underneath that coat was a very slender boy.”
Evanfloofical (floofinition) – of or according to the teachings of the animals.
In use: “Following the evanfloofical faith, he soon learned about being patient, compassionate, and giving while interacting with his pets.”
Inflooftory (floofinition) – process for to account for or count pets and other animals.
In use: “An inflooftory was conducted each evening to ensure all the animals were safe and fed. Fortunately all held to habits that shortened the time and effort to locate the dogs, cats, birds, reptiles, and the goat.”
Panfloofism (floofinition) – the belief that housepets have consciousiness, intelligence, and rights equal to humans.
In use: “Her panfloofism kept her from marrying for several years because she simply couldn’t tolerate anyone who thought of cats, dogs, and other animals as dumb beasts.”
Floof-toll (floofinition) – a tax or fee paid to housepets for some liberty or privilege; compensation paid by housepets for services such as feeding, treats, and fresh water.”
In use: “The rescue was his first dog but he soon realized that floof-tolls were attached to everything. Whenever he stood still or sat, the dog came, sat on his foot, and looked up at him in adoration. In return, the dog warned him whenever a pedestrian, car, or another animal approached the house. Both enjoyed the other, and the floof-tolls, such as a scratch around the ears or a treat, were tiny tokens for the shared joy.”
Floofstakes (floofinition) – potential outcome for housepets; in jeopardy for being a positive or negative result for a pet.
In use: “He hated taking his fur friends to the vet. Too often, the floofstakes weren’t good, beginning the slide down a long hill he’d gone down too many times.”
Floofjury (floofinition) – a wound or wounds inflicted by a housepet; one or more judgemental housepet(s).
In use: “He rolled over. Arising from its sleep, his cat reared back and swatted across his face, leaving him with a bleeding floofjury.”
Michael Seidel, writer 