Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Ad Floof (floofinition) – An animal assembly created without previous planning. Origins: Flooftin roots, with the use as given first noted in 1879.
In Use: “The ad floof convened every day whenever someone got in the kitchen to get something to eat and fur beasts wandered in to see what’s cooking.”
In Use: “Carrie left the house for a walk only to discover an ad floof of deer, dog, squirrel, and cat plotting in the front yard.”
Tendflooftious (floofinition) – Marked by a tendency in favor of animals. Origins: 1874, probably of Floofman origins but first noted in print in Flooflish in that same year.
In Use: “With three cats, two dogs, a bird, and several fish, his decision making was often tendflooftious, putting concern for his non-human companions above his own.
In Use: “Her love for her dogs drove a tendflooftious attitude, so all of whatever she ate was prepared with an eye to sharing with her beagle and collie.”
Floofllantis (floofinition) – To brighten a space or existence with an animal’s representation or presence. Origins: Floof Marketing PLC, 1999.
In Use: “During the pandemic, when people were urged to stay home and many businesses were shuttered, the popularity of floofllantis grew, resulting in a large increase in housepets.”
In Use: “Realizing how the Internet could be employed to enhance animals’ situations, Floof Marketing PLC launched the first floofllantis campaign, urging existing housepets to act silly, cute, loving, or interesting to entice their hoomans to share videos on the net.”
AF (Artificial Flooftelligence) (floofinition) 1. Machines or toys made to emulate or duplicate animal behavior or sounds. Origins:
In Use: “Some companies and people think that AF (Artificial Flooftelligence) is the way to go, giving people the impression that they have a fur friend with little barking and meowing mechanical critters, but true floof lovers recognize the soulessness of these mechanical devices.”
2. Attributing greater smarts to an animal than they actually have. Origins: Internet circa 2017.
In Use: “People who live with pets often claim their furry sweetie is the smartest ever, ascribing the critters with artificial flooftelligence like the animals are Stephen Hawkings in animal guise.”
Floofdemonium (floofinition) – A chaotic situation or wild uproar with origins in the presence or behavior of one or more animals. Origins: 1667, “The Land of Floofdemonium”, author unknown.
In Use: “The dog was wary and the cat was alarmed, but the kittens were curious about what Megan was doing, nosing toward the red upright machine she rolled into the room, but as soon as Megan switched it on, floofdemonium erupted with floofs pelting into eight different directions, changing courses as they bounced off one another.”
Flooflogism (floofinition) – Deductive reasoning animals employ through a series of cascading observations and conclusions. Origins: Middle Flooflish floogisme, from Anglo-Floof floofogisme, from Flooftin floofgismus, animal calculating.
In Use: “Using flooflogism, Rebel concluded, everything looks like food, I like to eat food, so I’ll eat everything, and began munching on a slipper.”
In Use: “Messup’s flooflogism inspired her to always jump to the highest place she can, so one could never easily spot her and always had to search the highest, most unimaginable places.”
Floofsoundpretation (floofinition) – Ability to hear animal activities and discern what they’re doing, based on the sound. Predominantly applies to housepets. Origins: Floofmany (located in Germany), first noted in Germany letters in the 1880s.
In Use: “Living with cats all of her life made Anita well-versed in floofsoundpretation, and as soon as she heard a light thump, she shouted, “Misty, you better get off that kitchen counter right now,” then nodded as a subsequent thud revealed that Misty had jumped down.”
BFF (floofinition) – Shorthand for ‘best floof friend’ or alternatively, ‘best fur friend’. Origins: Internet circa 1999.
In Use: “Pogo and Scheckter, aka the infamous OrangeBoiz, were not just brothers but BFFs, hunting, sleeping, eating, and playing together through all cycles of day and night and all seasons of weather.”
In Use: “It’s not uncommon for a human to become a BFF. That was certainly the case with Merlin, who cared not a paw for other animals, but adored his BFF, Shirl, shadowing her in all endeavors.”
Floofviousness (floofinition) – A quality of a clever animal who is both dishonest and tricks people and other animals while remaining successful and respected. Origins: Boston, MA, 1840.
In Use: “Quinn’s floofviousness is an earmark of his distinctive personality, for none are as adept at sneaking up, stealing food, getting away with it even when caught, by flashing wide, bright jade eyes at his accusers.”
In Use: “Rascal’s floofviousness earned him his nom de floof when he was a puppy discovered stealing socks, shoes, and underwear, stashing it under the bed for future uses which only he could imagine.”
Mar-A-Floofgo (floofinition) – Literally, ‘sea of floofs’, a mythical place among housefloofs where everything can be scratched, destroyed, or knocked over, and be magically repaired overnight; where treats fall from the skies like rain and animals can eat as much as they want; where cans are always being opened, bacon, steak, cheese, and chicken, are always being served, where food and water bowls are never empty, and your favorite person is always there to play or cuddle. Origins: “The Live Floof Scrolls”, a set of hundreds of scrolls of ancient floof prophecies and histories, recovered between 1946 and 1956 from Floofrum Cave, and since partially translated.
In Use: “Many people see their pet floofs moving in their sleep, limbs twitching, eyes flickering, and think that they’re ‘chasing a rabbit’ but other floofs know that the animals are often visting Mar-A-Floofgo through the floof portal.” — excerpt from “Through the Floof Portal”, 1871.
Michael Seidel, writer 