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Telefloofnesis (floofinition) – a housepet’s production of motion in objects (as by a quantum medium) without contact or other physical means.
In use: “Sometimes, playing with his human pet, the Cocker Spaniel employed his telefloofnesis to steal food from the man’s plate and eat it, always baffling the man about how it had happened.”
Floofternize (floofinition) – housepets who are friendly with one another, regardless of species or relationships.
In use: “To everyone’s satisfaction, the home cats floofternized with the visiting felines, with Doodlecat and Stoney buddying up to one another, and the other cats sharing their food and toys.”
Inflooftion (floofinition) – increasing the number of housepets in a household.
In use: “While economic experts worried about inflation, Miles worried about inflooftion. He’d begun by feeding one stray dog, and now here she was, leading a small pack of puppies. After seeing those faces, he dismisses his inflooftionary worries and invited them into his house.”
Floofthora (floofinition) – an abundance of housepets.
In use: “It’d begun with a rescue Pittie and a rescue cat. Then a stray tom was taken in, puppies and kittens were born, a parrot came along. Suddenly a floofthora was ruling their home.”
Floofanym (floofinition) – the other names by which a housepet is know, either to one another, or to the people they live with; a housepet’s secret name; the names given to a housepet seen by others when their real name(s) aren’t known.
In use: “Although her name was Jade, her floofanym was Pokey, given for the lazy deliberation with which she enjoyed investigating things.”
Flooftzy (floofinition) – a housepet who is eccentric, scatterbrained, easily confused, or does silly things.
In use: “Demonstrating new levels of being flooftzy, the little tabby cat attacked the garbage can’s swivel lid, beating it as it went around and around.”
Cornufloofpia (floofinition) – a curved, hollow goat’s horn or similarly shaped receptacle (such as a horn-shaped basket) that is overflowing with a sleeping housepet.
In use: “She’d begun a project to make a classic Thanksgiving cornucopia, but after putting the horn-shaped basket out and going for more supplies, she returned to discover her dog had wedged herself partially into it, turning it into a cornufloofpia overflowing with floof.”
Brinkfloofship (floofintion) – a housepet’s practice of pushing an uncomfortable or undesirable situation or confrontation to the limit to force a desired outcome
In use: “Tail swishing, the little cat stalked the old Tom despite the latter’s growls, taking its brinkfloofship to levels not seen before and the house, and prompting the German Shepherd to intervene to keep the peace.”
Floofigans (floofinition) – a noisy young housepet who causes trouble.
In use: “A loud crash in the kitchen brought a sigh to Keri’s lips and the question that she’d been asking a lot since acquiring the young cat, “What are you doing now, you little floofigan?” A moment later, said floofigan trotted out of the kitchen, graced her with a wide-eyed look, issued an adamant meow of denial, put its tail up and ran to her. Exasperated as she was, she had to smile as the feline leaped onto her lap, kneaded her thigh, and purred.”
Flooftake (floofinition) – housepets eating or drinking something that a human was planning to eat or drink.
In use: “He made a mistake, leaving his sandwich and chips on a plate on the table while he went into the other room for his book. Upon returning, he found the cat and dog had flooftaken the sandwich, and were working on the chips.”
Michael Seidel, writer 