Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floof Eye (floofinition) – Look of suspicion or irritation that an animal, particularly a pet, gives a human or another animal.
In use: “She tried tiptoeing around her plans to take the dog to the vet, but sensing something was up, he gave her the floof eye and hid.”
Nonfloofsance (floofinition) – Failure to do what an animal wants to be done.
In use: “In a show of doggy nonfloofsance, the little border collie refused to yield his bed to the cat despite her intense staring and a raised paw.”
Floof Accompli (floofinition) – A thing accomplished by an animal and apparently irreversible.
In use: “By the time she paid attention to what was going on, the dog had edged onto her lap, put down his head, and gone to sleep. Accepting the floof accompli, she stayed still except to stroke his face, unwilling to disturb him, even though she had things to do.”
Capfloofvate (floofinition) – For an animal to dominate and influence a human by a unique trait, charm, or irresistible appeal.
In use: “Marcy’s cat, Emir, often capfloofvated her by rushing in to attempt to peer into Marcy’s mouth whenever Marcy began singing.”
Good morning, my fellow human beans. Today is Monday, December 6, 2021. Weather report says it mostly cloudy here. Looking out, I see no blue sky nor sunshine. An unbroken roll of mild gray has been unleashed over the valley. At least it’s not foggy this AM, although I see streaks of fog hugging ravines and foothills. We’re looking for a high of 51 F today. It’s doable. Sunshine did break through yesterday in the early afternoon, burning the fog away. When I stepped to a window to enjoy it, my irises cried out with injury, recoiling from the light and retreating to my head’s darkest recesses. Yeah, it’d been a while since we’d had sun that bold, clear, and bright.
I have a Gin Blossoms song, “Follow You Down” from 1996 on repeat in the morning mental music stream. The cats put it there. Basically, being bored and restless felines, they began following me around yesterday. Wherever I went, they were attendees. “Oh, what are we getting in the pantry?” “Hey, let’s all go to the bathroom, come on!” Sitting at the desk, I had one on the desk, butting my hand (which really increases the difficulty when typing), another on my feet below, and one on the windowsill behind me. They were like, “Everywhere you go, I’ll follow you around.” So you see why the Gin Blossoms song wormed into my consciousness.
Stay positive, test negative, wear thy mask as situationally needed to reduce spread, and get jabs when you can. Think I’ll have some coffee now. Anyone else? No? Okay, then. Here’s the music.
Cheers
Floof-aid (floofinition) – 1. Emotional, physical, medical, or logistic assistance given to an animal.
In use: “The little stray cat was pregnant so they gave her floof-aid, bringing her in from the cold rain, feeding her, and providing a safe, warm space for her to give birth.”
2. Help provided by an animal, especially a pet, to a human.
In use: “Pets often stand ready to provide floof-aid when it comes to decorating the home for the holidays, especially when Christmas trees are put up.”
Serenfloofpity (floofinition) – Luck that takes the form of finding pleasant animal or animal traits that are not expected.
In use: “Many people now sharing a home with a new pet enjoy the serenfloofpity of witnessing the pet’s quirks and habits unfold, but for cat and dog lovers, finding a convert, say a man who never liked cats who is now inseparable from a little ball of fur, might be as great a joy.”
Imfloofsion (floofinition) – Being inundated by animals.
In use: “Cold days without sunshine can sometimes cause imfloofsion as the pets cuddle with humans for warmth.”
Lingua Floofa (floofinition) – Various animal languages and terms cobbled together to establish a common tongue among species and breeds of diverse speech.
In use: “Lingua floofa is commonly employed among pets such as dogs, cats, and hamsters, but movement in the twenty-first century also has farm animals using the language, and animals like deer as they live in closer proximity to humans in cities.”
Michael Seidel, writer 