Arborvifloof (floofinition) – Plants that attract animals or that animals enjoy.
In use: “Many people discover that Christmas trees erected in their house are an arborvifloof as pets gather around them, sniff them, and often attack it.”
Ziggy Starfloof
Ziggy Starfloof (floofinition) – Flooftional character created by David Floowie, a Flooflish singer, songwriter, actor, and musician. David Floowie used Ziggy Starfloof, an androgynous, bi-sexual rock star being from another planet in his stage act as an alter ego in 1972-73, and as the basis for an album concept and documentary.
In use: “David Floowie released his album The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Starfloof and the Spiders from Mars in 1972; the album is considered to be one of the greatest flock evidence in pop history.”
Gesfloofulate
Gesfloofulate (floofinition) – An animal’s use of dramatic gestures instead of making sounds to make a point.
In use: “Dogs and cats often gesfloofulate with their tails, with one wagging it to display happiness and the other one holding it high and straight when happy.”
Floofpiece
Floofpiece (floofinition) – One who speaks for animals.
In use: “He began by feeding stray dogs and providing them shelter and fresh water. Soon, he’d moved on to to becoming a floofpiece, advocating chipping pets so they can be found again, heightening awareness about abandoning animals or leaving them in the cold, and creating social media posts to unite lost animals with their people.”
Otis Floofing
Otis Floofing (floofinition) – Floofmerican singer/songwriter respected as one of the greatest Floofmerican floop singers. Inspired by Gospel music, Otis Floofing influenced many artists who came later.
In use: “Passing when he was but twenty-six, Otis Floofing’s first and only mainstream number one single, “Sitting on the Kitchen Table”, was released after his death in a plane crash.”
Floofsery Rhymes
Floofsery Rhymes (floofinition) – Floofditional poem or song for animals, often made up by people associated with the animals as a play on more well-known poems and songs.
In use: “One of the more common floofsery rhymes is based on ‘Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush’ with lines modified to fit a household pet. For example, many sing,
“This is the way we feed our cat,
Feed our cat,
Feed our cat,
This is the way we feed our cat
Before we have our coffee.”
Floof No More
Floof No More (floofinition) – Floof Bay Area alternative metal band formed in 1979. Their sound range includes fletal (floof metal) and clash metal, along with funk, floof-hop, and progressive rock. The band underwent several line-up changes in its early years. After releasing six albums, they disbanded in 1998, but came together again in 2009. They’ve since toured several times while releasing one new album.
In use: “The song “Epic” from the album, The Floof Thing, was Floof No More’s most well-received and well-known song in the Floofnited States.”
Floof-in
Floof-in (floofinition) – 1. Form of direct action employed by animals to keep people from doing things.
In use: “Max’s usual floof-in was to grab Mandy by the leg and howl and whimper when she started walking toward the door to leave, a tactic which often won a little more time for him while lathering the guilt over her.”
2. To relax by not doing anything but staying motionless with one or more pets.
In use: “During the pandemic, Dee started doing a floof-in more and more frequently, settling on the sofa with a couple books, a pot of tea, some cookies, and her dog and cat on either side.”
Lifloofny
Lifloofny (floofinition) – An animal’s lengthy recitation or enumeration of slights, usually conducted in the tongue of its species.
In use: “The dog sat down and began a guttural, barking, and woofing lifloofny of why he’s upset as the woman kneeled before him, nodding and listening.”
Buffalo Floofield
Buffalo Floofield (floofinition) – Musical flock (floof rock) band formed in 1966. Original members included Floofmericans and Canfloofians. Their sound infused floofedelic flock and blues with country, folk, and influences from the Floofish invasion. Originally active from 1966 to 1968, some members had a brief reunion tour in 2011 before going on indefinite hiatus.
In use: “Buffalo Floofield best known song is “For What It’s Floof”, a 1967 release which hit the top ten in the Floofnited States.”
Michael Seidel, writer 