Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Lycanfloofpy (floofinition) – a delusion that a housepet has become a wolf; a housepet’s assumption of the form and characteristics of a wolf held to be possible by witchcraft, magic, or quantum mechanics.
In use: “If your cat suffers from lycanfloofpy, they’re apt to howl at the moon when it’s full, and become more predatory, stalking you and others as though it’s hungry like a wolf.”
Floofpensity (floofinition) – a housepet’s inclination or natural tendency to behave in a particular way.
Floofthanize (floofinition) – to be loved to death by a housepet.
In use: “Large and intractable, the pittie was determined to show his affection to Anders whenever Anders returned home, so Anders had to accommodate being floofthanized for thirty minutes to an hour in his daily schedule.”
Floofanomics (floofinition) – the costs and budgeting process associated with feeding and caring for housepets. The four pillars associated with floofanomics are, keep your pets happy, get your pets healthy, keep your pets healthy, and keep your pets happy.
In use: “With floofanomics, decisions sometimes become difficult with cats. While dogs seem willing to eat any- and everything, cats sometimes shun what they just scarfed down a minute before. It’s a mystery.”
Magna Cata (floofinition) – legendary charter of rights signed by feline representatives. Reports vary about where the Magna Cata was signed and its fate. One enduring theory suggests that Noah was forced to create the document to entice two cats to board the ark, but then burned it after the waters rose.
In use: “The dog smirked at the cat. “The Magna Cat no longer exists,” he said. “Some stupid cat started playing with it and tore it up.” Seeing the cat’s baleful gaze, the dog said, “At least, that’s what I’ve always been told.””
Floofercise (floofinition) – exercise achieved by interaction with a housepet; exercise routines used by housepets.
In use: “Every day, the young orange cat walked up to the person when she emerged from the bedroom and mewed in greeting, and then jumped into a floofercise routine, galloping around the room as though an invisible rider had applied spurs to the cat.”
Floofmiration (floofinition) – a feeling of wonder, pleasure, or approval about a housepet; a housepet’s demonstration of wonder, pleasure, or approval about an object or being.
In use: “It was a mutual floofmiration process, with the cat on the man’s lap, gazing at him with adoration as the man stroked the cat’s gray fur, and the two dogs lounged on the sofa on either side, relaxed and comfortable.”
Floofversive (floofinition) – a housepet seeking or intending to subvert an established system or hierarchy.
In use: “The big boxer knew he was the resident king, but the new puppy was an unaware floofversive.”
Floofhaha (floofinition) – an uproar caused by a housepet.
In use: “A floofhaha erupted when one cat jumped onto the table – where no animal was authorized – and the beagle started barking to alert the people about the crime, causing the flighty young tabby cat to leap off the window sill to a coffee table, where they slid into houseplant, sending it crashing to the floor.”
Floofculent (floofinition) – a housepet who is aggressively defiant.
In use: “”Get off the table, you floofculent beast,” she said, squirting the cat again. Emitting a long, scornful meow, the small tuxedo fellow hunkered down, but stayed on the table.”
Michael Seidel, writer 