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Floofclivity (floofinition) – a housepet’s inclination or predisposition toward something.
In use: “The oldest cat, Max, had a massive floofclivity to eating from the man’s place. Though the man struggled for years to stop him, the cat’s will and determination won.”
Floofback (floofinition) – a housepet who sleeps on their back; a housepet who sleeps on another housepet’s back; a housepet who sleeps on people’s backs.
In use: “A true floofback, Crystal loved hopping onto my back whenever I lay down on my stomach, curl up, and go to sleep.”
Floofbehaving (floofinition) – acting like an animal, regardless of what humans want an animal to do or the rules and restrictions people impose on their housepets.
In use: “She said, “He’s been misbehaving. He ate the Elf on the Shelf.” He replied, “You think it’s misbehaving, but it’s just floofbehaving. It’s just a dog being a dog.””
Lenfloofcular (floofinition) – housepet who resembles a lentil when they’re sleeping.
In use: “At a casual glance, the cats’ lenfloofcular positions made it look like Jack had dropped big three beans onto the bed.”
Imflooftu (floofinition) – to make a spontaneous decision to adopt an animal as a housepet.
In use: “He’d never considered himself a dog person, but the young beagle’s quiet, sad gaze initiated an imflooftu decision, and so his love affair with beagles began, with a quiet one named Single.”
Noifloof (floofinition) – something obnoxious or offensive to housepets; housepet activity that is offensive to people.
In use: “The garbage truck’s weekly roar was a noifloof interruption to the popuflooftion’s idyllic routines, sending the cats and dogs into anxious hiding.”
Popuflooftion (floofinition) – all the housepets in a particular home, house, or apartment.
In use: “The ranch-style home included two adults and a popuflooftion of three cats, two dogs, and one each, bird, turtle, gecko, and hamster.”
Quadrafloofic (floofinition) – of, or relating to, four housepets.
In use: “Life with his animals was often quadrafloofic as the three dogs and single cat — the ringleader, if you must know — surrounded him, regardless of his activity. This made using the toilet particularly challenging.”
Floofgiving (floofinition) – an observance to show affectation and gratitude to housepet(s).
In use: “Every morning when he got up, again when he returned home, and again before going to bed, he showered his pets with kisses, and gave them treats, making everyday Floofgiving in his home.”
He ran ahead with his tail up, as I’ve so often seen him do.
Then, stopping, he looked back and meowed, as I’ve often witnessed him do.
Smiling, I waved and called his name. He turned and went on.
Still smiling, I turned aside.
And I went on, too.
Michael Seidel, writer 