Complefloofrianism

Complefloofrianism (floofinition) – Floofological view that animals have equal but different roles from humans in life. Origins: First used by The International Order of Floofs (TIOF) in 1988.

In Use: “As practitioners of complefloofrianism, Beth’s pets ignored her orders as they’d gotten together and elected one of their own, Beanie, as the house’s ruler, and limited Beth’s roles to cleaning and feeding duties.”

Monufloofal

Monufloofal (floofinition) 1. A huge, or ginormous (relative to its species) animal. Origins: late twentieth century Internet.

In Use: “Col Sanders (named for where he was found and rescued but often called Jumbo) was monufloofal, and when he slept with people, he seemed to double in size, rendering laps numb, and taking up all the space wherever he slumbered.”

2. A highly significant or important animal. Origins: early twenty-first century world wide web.

In Use: “Ol’ Jax was an undersized Jack Russell to most people, but Ol’ Jax was a monufloofal aspect of the homeless vet’s street existence.”

Floofturb

Floofturb (floofinition) 1. An animal which interrupts an activity. Origins: 14th century Middle Floofish.

In Use: “Marmalade is a known and famous floofturb. Interrupting the making of a bed is one of his floofcialies.”

2. An animal which causes worry or anxiety. Origins: late 20th century world wide web.

In Use: “Her propensity for roaming the neighborhood earned Patience many friends but also floofturbed her people with endless worry about her.”

Infloofpacitate

Infloofpacitate (floofinition) – Movement, positions, or activities limited by an animal or animals’ presence. Origins: Early Common Floof Era, from Middle Floofish. First noted use in England, circa 600 CE.

In Use: “Many people find themselves infloofpacitated by an unwillingness to disturb a furry friend napping on their body”

Apfloofrition

Apfloofrition (floofinition) – A rare or unusual appearance of an animal.

In Use: “People enjoy sharing photos and videos on Flooftube of apfloofritions, particularly cats showing up in their house, when they don’t own a cat!”

Floofcast

Floofcast (floofinition) 1. A production about an animal available to the public for entertainment or informational purposes. The production may be posted to the net on social media or presented via cable or satellite communications.

In Use: “Many social media users end up creating and sharing interesting or amusing floofcasts about their pets or rescues and share them on the net, such as Owl Kitty.”

2. An advisory from an animal that something is on the verge of happening.

In Use: “At 9:03 AM one Sunday morning, Sandi’s dog leaped up and urgently barked. Then he grabbed Sandi’s hand and lead her to another room. An instant later, a large tree crashed into the room where Sandi had been sitting. If not for Barkley’s floofcast, Sandi may have been injured or killed.”

Floofbit (2)

Floofbit (floofinition) – An animal who seems to have a job to make people get up and move around. Origins: 2007, Ohio, United States, Facebook

In Use: “When her son suggested that Karla needed a Fitbit to remind her to move, she pointed to her young dogs and replied, ‘Don’t worry, I got Crockett and Tubbs to keep me moving.’ As if that was a cue, Tubbs sprang up and started barking and racing around, which naturally drew Crockett into the vortex, and made Karla get up and go to the back door, yelling, ‘You two take that into the backyard.'”

Nonfloofpete Agreement

Nonfloofpete Agreement (floofinition) Agreement between animals not to fight and to cooperate when socializing or interacting with humans. Origins: 18th Century Floofgress Instruments for Successful Living Among Humans (ISLAH).

In Use: “Humans don’t know about nonfloofpete agreements and are suprised when the cats and dogs and other creatures sleep and play together, sharing food, treats, and lap time.”

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