The sun on my fur
Kibble and water for me
Life is sweet, sweet, sweet
Infloofsition
Infloofsition (floofinition) – a severe questioning conducted by one or more housepets.
In use: “The floofizens gathered to conduct an infloofsition as soon as the bag was opened. When she set it down, the cats jumped up on chairs and tried reaching into it with their paws, while the big dog tried shoving his snout into the bag (earning a swat from a cat), and the little dog sniffed the air while jumping up and down, trying to see the bag.”
Floofpoch
Floofpoch (floofinition) – an event or a time characterized by having one or more specific housepets whose presence defines a new era.
In use: “The Flash Floofpoch meant no other animals were permitted in the yard, let alone the house. The little cat was on constant vigil against interlopers, jumping up from sound floofzes to rush to the window, look out, and growl at other beasts — squirrels, cats, dogs, people, whatever.”
Floofprocity
Floofprocity (floofinition) – expectation among housepets that if one pet is given something, the others get some, too.
In use: “”Hello, sweetie,” he said to his puppy, bending down giving the happy, wriggling animal several scratches and kisses. As he looked up, the other dog and both cats headed his way, ready for some floofprocity.”
Floofaroni
Floofaroni (floofinition) – 1. A housepet that features long, tubular bodies that remind people of macaroni; 2. Housepets that seem as loose and pliable as cooked macaroni noodles; 3. Macaroni covered in pet fur; 4. The macaroni that a pet starts eating.
In use: “After making mac and cheese for herself, set it on the table to go back and get pepper and a glass of wine. When she came back, the lab was standing on his hind legs, eating her meal. When she shouted, “Hey,” he looked at her like he was saying, “I thought this was floofaroni. This isn’t for me?””
Floofcadian
Floofcadian (floofinition) – characterized by, or occurring in periods or cycles dictated by housepets.
In use: “In theory, he went to bed at midnight and got up at six thirty to seven in the morning, but the cat’s floofcadian rhythm meant he awoke several times, usually beginning at three oh seven, to deal with cats going in and out, asking for food, or causing mischief because they’re bored.”
Floofproach
Floofproach (floofinition) – the manner taken to walk up to, pet, or speak to a housepet.
In use: “One must be cautious in their floofproach when dealing with Tina. She’s gentle and sweet, but she is large and has her floofuliarities. For example, an unexpected hand toward her face will earn one a sharp rebuke.”
Michael Seidel, writer 