Category: humor

Friday’s Theme Music

Good morning. Welcome to the latest edition of Overthinking Song Lyrics. 

Today’s show is about the Alicia Keys’ song, “Girl On Fire” (2012).

Alicia Keys is a remarkable talent, and we enjoy her many songs and skills here at the Overthinking Institute. To be fair, she’s one of three co-writers on the song, the others being Jeff Bhasker and Salaam Remi. We’d be remiss to not mention that Billy Squier has a writing credit on the song, as it’s based in some aspects on a previous song that he wrote.

The following verses trouble us at the Overthinking Institute:

She got both feet on the ground
And she’s burning it down
Ohhhh oh oh oh oh
She got her head in the clouds
And she’s not backing down
This girl is on fire

Read more: Alicia Keys – Girl On Fire Lyrics | MetroLyrics

To us, if she has both feet on the ground, what is she burning down? One would presume she’s burning down the ground that she stands upon. Indeed, if that’s the case, it’s no wonder she’s on fire. One must also ask, can you burn the ground down?

But to continue, having her head in the clouds brings to thought a person who’s not engaged with reality. It’s then disturbing that she’s not backing down, burning it down, and she’s on fire. I worry for her state of mind.

“Girl On Fire” achieved notable success and critical claim, and is a quite memorable ballad. Nevertheless, these seem like some troubling lyrics. Our colleagues over at the Just Get Over It Institute tell us to just get over it.

You tell us: are we making too much of this here at Overthinking?

Good day.

 

 

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Lycanfloofpy

Lycanfloofpy (floofinition) – a delusion that a housepet has become a wolf; a housepet’s assumption of the form and characteristics of a wolf held to be possible by witchcraft, magic, or quantum mechanics.

In use: “If your cat suffers from lycanfloofpy, they’re apt to howl at the moon when it’s full, and become more predatory, stalking you and others as though it’s hungry like a wolf.”

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Floofpensity

Floofpensity (floofinition) – a housepet’s inclination or natural tendency to behave in a particular way.

In use: “Although the cat had never been more than a few steps from the back door, where he liked to sun on the patio. his floofpensity was to stalk everyone and everything in the house, pouncing on objects, gallivanting around like he chased game, and swatting at the air.”
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I Live In My Writing

I live in my writing,

an odd place to be,

but you’d be there, too,

if you see what I see.

 

I live in my writing,

and lose track of time,

at least in this world,

but, to me, that’s fine.

 

I live in my writing,

enjoying the ambiance of life,

it’s an unlimited existence,

and has far less strife.

 

I live in my writing,

and some are dismayed,

so am I, really,

because I never get paid.

 

I live in my writing,

it’s a solitary existence,

and maybe existential,

but at least it’s consistent.

 

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The Optimistic Writer

He’d died, but he didn’t know it. He’d been writing his novel, and then editing and revising it. It wasn’t until he’d finished it that he came up for air and discovered he no longer had a body, and wasn’t a part of anyone’s earthly existence.

As far as he could ascertain, he’d been dead for several months. Probate of his meager estate was concluded, his clothing and personal items given away, and his name moved from one set of records to another. The cause of his death wasn’t clear. It seemed that he couldn’t see that, no matter how he tried to view it.

After some reflection, he wasn’t too concerned. Being dead meant no more concerns about money, health, politics, and the environment. He didn’t need to worry about being killed crossing the street or shot by some madman with a gun. The worst part about his death appeared to be that he was out of coffee.

That was going to put a crimp in his plans. On the other hand, he had a new novel idea.

He couldn’t wait to get started.

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Floofthanize

Floofthanize (floofinition) – to be loved to death by a housepet.

In use: “Large and intractable, the pittie was determined to show his affection to Anders whenever Anders returned home, so Anders had to accommodate being floofthanized for thirty minutes to an hour in his daily schedule.”

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Floofanomics

Floofanomics (floofinition) – the costs and budgeting process associated with feeding and caring for housepets. The four pillars associated with floofanomics are, keep your pets happy, get your pets healthy, keep your pets healthy, and keep your pets happy.

In use: “With floofanomics, decisions sometimes become difficult with cats. While dogs seem willing to eat any- and everything, cats sometimes shun what they just scarfed down a minute before. It’s a mystery.”

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Sunday’s Theme Music

This is such a maudlin, sloppy song. It started streaming apropos of nothing that I can recall, but as I streamed it from memory, I thought about how meaningless the words might be for a younger listener.

“Sealed With A Kiss” came out in 1962, when I was six. It was a hit, so it was on the radios often, but I’m more familiar with the Bobbie Vinton version released when I was a teenager. This song is all about being morose because they’re missing their love, so they’ll send all their love, every day in a letter, sealed in a kiss.

I thought, well, these days, they probably wouldn’t be sending a letter. I imagined youth saying, why didn’t they just send them a text or a selfie? Why didn’t they just Skype?

I decided that, “I’ll send you all my love, every hour in a selfie, clicked with a kiss.”

WTH.

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Magna Cata

Magna Cata (floofinition) – legendary charter of rights signed by feline representatives. Reports vary about where the Magna Cata was signed and its fate. One enduring theory suggests that Noah was forced to create the document to entice two cats to board the ark, but then burned it after the waters rose.

In use: “The dog smirked at the cat. “The Magna Cat no longer exists,” he said. “Some stupid cat started playing with it and tore it up.” Seeing the cat’s baleful gaze, the dog said, “At least, that’s what I’ve always been told.””

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Floofercise

Floofercise (floofinition) – exercise achieved by interaction with a housepet; exercise routines used by housepets.

In use: “Every day, the young orange cat walked up to the person when she emerged from the bedroom and mewed in greeting, and then jumped into a floofercise routine, galloping around the room as though an invisible rider had applied spurs to the cat.”

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