Monday’s Bumper Sticker
Floofledy-goofledy
Floofledy-goofledy (floofinition) – a confused, disordered, or random collection of animals or animal-related objects.
In use: “After eating and playing, puppies, ducks, dogs, cats, and kittens settled in a floofledy-goofledy rest on a large sunlit carpet in the living room where it was almost impossible to discern where one animal began and another ended.”
Subterfloof
Subterfloof (floofinition) – a housepet’s deception or strategem to gain advantage.
In use: “The three dogs were told to wait to pick up their treats, but employing a subterfloof predicated on being quick, the smallest took all three treats.”
Floofant
Floofant (floofinition) – net slang for very young or newborn animals.
In use: “Two new rescued kittens, just days old, were brought to her for care. She introduced her to Mama Greta, who took to them like they were her own, bringing the total that she nursed up to five. Stepping back, Hanna surveyed the floofants, happy to be helping such small, defenseless creatures. It gave her a reason to get up every day.”
The Muses Prayer
Oh Lord,
Help me write like crazy
and find the right words,
original words of passion, action, and intentions
that’ll convey the story that I think I’m trying to tell.
In the muses’ name I pray,
Amen.
So, Walking Today
A stream popped into my mind. It began with Reese Witherspoon. I’d read some article on her. I remembered her as Tracy Flick in Election. Then I struggled with, who was the male lead in that movie?
First to pop into my thinking was that guy from Fidelity, you know, the one who starred in Grosse Pointe Blank? He has that sister, Joan.
Yes, John Cusack, that’s right. No, that wasn’t him in Election. Whoever was in Election had been in WarGames, Biloxi Blues, and The Freshman. A Matthew. Clean-cut, kind of a boyish look. Matthew… Ward? What? No. Matthew. Matt…LeBlanc. No. Matthew Perry. Shut up. Matthew McConaughey. No, fool. Matthew…Matthew…
Damn.
Go back. Ally Sheedy was in WarGames. That doesn’t help. Matthew was in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, remember? Yes, what’s his last name? What’s his last name? Married to Sarah Jessica Parker. Remember her in L.A. Story as Steve Martin’s character’s young girlfriend?
At last: Broderick. Matthew Broderick.
Thank you.
Now who played the scientist in WarGames? Was in 9 to 5, Tootsie, Cloak and Dagger… Starts with a D. Daryl?
What?
Floofopalooza
Floofopalooza (floofinition) – an extravagant, all-out event involving housepets.
In use: “Sam the Beagle dashed around, sometimes barking, frightening the rambunctious kittens and scattering the tumbling puppies as their mothers – a Maine Coon and a Lab – watched and the parrot yelled abuses. Puppies and kittens came back together to bite and attack one another, gaining yelps, hisses, and mews. It was a hell of a floofopalooza.”
Floofsaurus
Floofsaurus (floofinition) 1. A housepet that reminds people of a dinosaur, often through its appearance, slow speed, tyrannical nature, or stand-offish personality. 2. A book that lists floofinitions and other words in groups of synonyms and related concepts.
In use: “Consulting a floofsaurus, he found a synonym for floofpourri was floofimaufry. Floofimaufry meant a haphazard collection of pet items. With smiles, he realized floofimaufry was the perfect word for his son’s room. Although only ten, his menagerie of mostly rescues included two dogs, three cats, a lizard, two birds, and a fresh-water aquarium of fish alongside a salt-water aquarium. Walking through the room was difficult for the aflooftrements littering the floor.”
Floofpose
Floofpose (floofinition) – 1. When a housepet seems to strike a pose while in the middle of doing something else. 2. The way housepets lay while sleeping.
In use: “The tortie was washing her face, and the lab was crossing the living room when both floofposed in the middle of their respective acts, bewildering their human. “What is it?” she said. “What do you see?” As if shrugging, the cat resumed watching and the dog continued to the pet door.”
