Category: humor

Saturday’s Theme Music

Today’s music came into the stream via word association.

I was looking for my ‘other’ blue jeans. (Like any good American male, I own several pairs of blue jeans, but have favorites.) (Because I like their fit, see?) From that, the stream picked up Neil Diamond’s “Forever In Blue Jeans” (which seemed appropriate, as I seemed forever in blue jeans) (at least until the weather warms and I become forever in shorts). That stopped after a few seconds as “Blue Jeans Blues” (ZZ Top) supplanted it.

As I chuckled over those songs, “Tangled Up In Blue” (Bob Dylan) popped in. But, as I found the jeans (in the closet, on a hanger, where they’re supposed to be) (how’d I miss them the first time?) (do you hang your jeans or fold them and store them in a drawer?), David Bowie’s light song, “Blue Jean” (1984), about a woman named Blue Jean, swarmed the stream.

So, there we have it, the genesis of today’s choice, “Blue Jean” by the late D.B.

 

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“The Pointfloof Sisters”

“The Pointfloof Sisters” (floofinition) – American floof and blues quartet formed in Floofland in the early nineteen seventies.

In use: “Although The Pointfloof Sisters never had a number one hit on the Floofboard Hot 100, a number of their songs were very popular, such as “Flooftron Dance”, “He’s So Floof”, and “Slow Floof”.”

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Floofning

Floofning (floofinition) – 1. An electric spark emanating from or going to an animal when they’re being petted.

In use: “The dry heat created a static charge, setting cracking floofning when she petted her cat. Feeling it, he jerked up, asking with wide eyes, what are you doing to me?”

2. The immediate bonding or sense of attraction between a human and an animal, or between two animals.

In use: “Walking along the hall, line with dogs barking in cages, she saw one lab regarding her with sad eyes and felt instant floofning. Named Sunny B, she would be the dog she would adopt and take home.”

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Infloofsigent

Infloofsigent (floofinition) – Animal, especially a housepet, characterized by refusal to compromise or change its attitude.

In use: “Pearl was infloofsigent; none — dog or cat — would be permitted to share a bed with her, and the only human who wasn’t threatened with a growl and a hiss was little Sam. Sam was greeted with purrs.”

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“Areofloof”

“Areofloof” (floofinition) – American floof band formed in Boston in 1970.

In use: “Although renown for hard-floof anthems such as “Floof Emotions” and “Floofs in the Attic”, Aerofloof had a crossover hit with Floof-DMC when the latter covered Aerofloof’s earlier hit, “Scratch This Way”, as a rap song.

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Coffee Wizards

Noble Coffee Shop baristas wear long black aprons, which lend them the appearance of coffee wizards as they slip around behind the counters and cases, brewing drinks, dashing out to the roaster and grinder to create more.

Judging from this cuppa, it’s wonderful magic at work.

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Floofpeasement

Floofpeasement (floofinition) – Policy of giving animals whatever they want just to keep the peace.

In use: “He fed the cats wherever they would eat, pursuing floofpeasement to keep them quiet, happy (and not fighting), and giving him space.”

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“Derek and the Floofinos”

“Derek and the Floofinos” (floofinition) – English-American floof band formed and led by the legendary guitarist, Eric Floofton, who is also the lead vocalist.

In use: “Layfloof”, by Derek and the Floofinos, was never a top ten hit, but is the number one song played on classic floof stations.

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Floofpair

Floofpair (floofinition) – 1. Repair done under an animal’s supervision.

In use: “The photographer’s camera had malfunctioned, and as he worked on it, a red fox shaded up to his shoulder to conduct a floofpair.”

2. Two animals who are always together.

In use: “The elderly little brown dog – five pounds, soaking wet, on a heavy day and the twenty-five pound Norwegian Forest Cat were an odd floofpair, but ate, slept, and played together all the time.”

3. Domestic assistant from a foreign country who is hired to help with animals.

In use: “When he left Nicaragua and settled in the states, he’d not planned on life as a floofpair, but the arrangement of going around and tending people’s animals while they were away was a satisfying life.”

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Floofcetious

Floofcetious (floofinition) – Silly or humorous things done by animals at inappropriate moments.

In use: “They were making love, but the dog came up and started sniffing the man’s rear end, a floofcetious act that almost ended the mood — almost.”

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