Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofomania (floofinition) – Obsessive desire to be with animals, or to immerse oneself in objects and matters related to animals.
In use: “It wasn’t enough that he had four cats. He’d become a floofomania, with cat art on his walls, cat sculpture on his tables, and cat-themed socks, shirts, and ties. Friends and family privately whispered to one another about holding an intervention. When he heard about it, he laughingly called it an ‘interflooftion’. That just disturbed them more.”
Flooftop (floofinition) – Game played among housepets. When they hear a can, box, or bag being opened, they all race to the source. First animal to arrive expects to receive all the goodies or food.
In use: “When she opened a can, the Yorkie leaped up with a yip and bolted into the kitchen like a flash of black light, slowing down only enough to look back and laugh at the cat before trotting into the kitchen to claim another flooftop victory.”
Yes, another odd dream.
First, I had an odd job as some sort of quality assurance or quality control inspector. Those dream job details never cleared enough for me to figure out. Guess it wasn’t important.
I was working in a small, old building where a business was undergoing renovation. It had been a coffee shop. Coffee drinks were still available, so I was happy with that as I walk around with my clipboard, observing and scribbling notes. The business owner, a man, was there, talking about the planned changes. He was in high spirits; so was I, and the few other people in there. When the business owner mentioned that he needed some minor help, I happily volunteered.
Then I learned that he wasn’t going to re-open his business as a coffee shop but as a fitness center. He went around enthusing where equipment would be located, where different fitness stations would be, fitness services that he would be offering. Well, good for him, but…I wanted my coffee shop. I was disappointed.
Meanwhile, my wife came by. She said that our car, a Volkswagen Beetle, wasn’t uninsured, but she was waiting for a call that would take care of that. (Please note, I’ve never owned a Beetle.) I was like, okay. She left again, errands to run. I continued my vague inspection job.
The business owner mentioned that he needed a car, did anyone have one that he could borrow? I offered my VW. As he thanked me, he told me that he would be driving to another part of the city, but he would be back later, if that was okay. Remembering that the car wasn’t insured, I asked with surprise, “You’re going to drive it?” He answered, “What else would I do with a car?” And laughed.
I didn’t want him to drive the car because it wasn’t insured. However, I wanted to help him. I questioned him. Would he be careful? Has he ever had an accident? What kind of driver was he?
My wife returned. She reminded me not to use the car because it wasn’t insured. I prepared to tell her that I’d loaned it out when someone came by and told me the owner wasn’t going to use it after all.
Then, though, came word that our dog was loose. (Please note, I’ve never had a dog.) I joined my wife out in a woody, muddy field, looking for our dog. As we walked around, looking, she started calling a name. The name was of a cat who passed away twenty years ago. I asked her, “Are we looking for a dog or a cat?”
She didn’t answer, going off. I was convinced we were looking for a lost cat and not a dog. I started calling the dead cat’s name as I walked through a meadow. Another cat came running across the meadow with its tail up, meowing at me. It didn’t resemble the dead cat at all, but I knew it was my pet. The deceased animal was a short-hair gray tabby, and the approaching cat was white with a torti ear and matching torti tail. Before the cat reached me, I turned and stepped back into the coffee shop under renovation to answer some questions about my work.
Dream end
Derfloofative (floofinition) – Animal behavior or actions which is imitative of behavior or actions of another animal or a person.
In Use: “A video of Riptide‘s derfloofative behavior when he attends an exercise class has people on the net watching and laughing.”
Subservfloofent (floofinition) – Someone who unquestioningly obeys animals’ requests, especially when dealing with pets.
In use: “Becky acknowledged that she was subservfloofent to her dog, answering every bark or look immediately, asking, ‘What is it, what’s the matter, what can I get you?'”
Luminal Floof (floofinition) – An animal at the threshold of change of life or situation, especially those who have endured and are starting anew under fresh circumstances.
In use: “The luminal floof, nominally a five-year-old cat appeared older, aged by years on the street, enduring winters, dodging traffic, and begging for food, still awaited a name at its new home, but took advantage of the quiet and secure warmth to stretch, yawn, and sleep.”
SNOFIE: Suspicious Nearby Object Floof Inspection & Examination (floofinition) – Highly developed process involving smelling, listening, eyeing, and sometimes tasting (SLET), employed by floofs to ascertain whether new materials or creatures found at hand is safe.
In use: “Using SLET, animals newly introduced to a home will recalibrate their SNOFIE by walking through all the rooms, visiting with every object, critter, and piece of furniture that they encounter.”
Primfloofal (floofinition) – Of or pertaining to an animal’s earliest existence.
In use: “The primfloofal days when a new pet joins a household are often ones of balances and exploration — balances as they test others and learn trust and boundaries, exploration as they sniff and look around, becoming accustomed to their new world.”
Michael Seidel, writer 