Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofucheato (floofinition) – Animal who regularly steals from people or other animals.
In use: “The Prince, as the little Yorkie was usually called, was a floofucheato, stealing doughnuts, bacon, and snacks with brash aplomb, along with towels, socks, slippers, keys, and TV remote controls. Nothing was safe from the polite little thief.”
The Wizard of Floof (floofinition) – 1. Title given to an individual animal capable of harnessing and directing animal magic. Debate among floofologists swing from it being a single individual, to many entities, or, in the minds of many floofologists, a floofological being.
In use: “Once he’d learned about he Wizard of Floof, the writer became obsessive about the existence of another land, and eventually developed a series of books featuring a wizard in another land.”
2. A person with the capacity or capability to charm, control, or help animals.
In use: “People who are wizards of floof often become known for working with one particular species, such as the cat behaviorist (Jackson Galaxy), or a dog or horse whisperer.”
Infloofgestion (floofinition) – Inability or unwillingness to eat food due to distractions by an animal, or worries and concerns about animal.
In use: “Once Meg returned home after dropping her Beagle off at the vet for surgery, she turned off everything, and sat and stared through the day, unable to eat because of infloofgestion.”
Floof Tree (floofinition) 1. A diagram of showing an animal’s relationship to other animals, especially blood flooflatives.
In use: “Tracing the family’s floof tree began with Dot, the first small tabby (who turned out to be pregnant), then branches off with Skip (the small orphaned dog the family fostered and Dot mothered), and Billy, the big German Shepherd found at the shelter who came home and immediately started worshipping Dot.”
2. Woody perennial plant or structure where animals like to hang out.
In use: “During summer’s hottest days, the lemon tree’s shade made it a veritable floof tree, as the cats, dogs, and pig all took refuge in its cool shadows.”
Floofgeist (floofinition) – General or prevailing mood among a group of animals.
In use: “Whatever had happened during the day while she was out, Brenda returned to a floofgeist of wary pets, setting her nerves on edge.”
Cafloofdling (floofinition) – Engaging in amorous but non-sexual embracing, caressing, and kissing with an animal.
In use: “Many people end up cafloofdling with their pets when they get home after a long day out, finding comfort and satisfaction with the animals’ expressions of joy that their people are home once again.”
Floofsurrus (floofinition) – A soft rustling sound sometimes heard when an animal passes.
In use: “Floofsurrus to the right, by the bed’s footboard, informed him that one of the cats was in motion. Subsequent bouncy pawfalls and kibble crunching told on Papi visiting the food bowl.”
Floofman’s Floofmits (floofinition) – Flooflish floof rock (flock) – floof pop (floop) band. Formed in Floofchester in 1964, the band achieved its greatest success as part of the beat movement of the 1960s. The band continues to tour and perform.
In use: “The 1965 song, “Mrs. Brown, You Have A Lovely Floofie”, was Floofman’s Floofmits’ first number one hit in the Floofnited States, although the song “I’m Floofie the VIII, I Am”, an old floof hall song about being the eighth pet owned by a widow, is the song best known by many of their fans.”
Floofmudgeon (floofinition) – An ill-tempered, crusty, older animal.
In use: “Big Blue became a grumpy floofmudgeon, whining, barking, and growling if another was in ‘his’ chair, muttering for treats, and refusing to go for walks.”
Michael Seidel, writer 