Floofhaste (floofinition) – The need to do something quickly for an animal.
In use: “The looks they were giving and the noises they made ordered Tanya, ‘Feed me now,’ sending her to replenish the food bowls floofhaste.”
UFLO
UFLO (floofinition) – Expression which means ‘Unsuspecting Floof Owner’. Used to describe a person who doesn’t know what their animal is up to, it’s often associated with pets having secret lives.
In use: “While they went about their daily business, the UFLO didn’t know that their cat, Johnny, was known as a friendly feline named Ghost who visited a neighbor two blocks away, napping on the bed, and enjoying the food put out for their own pets.”
FOLS
FOLS (floofinition) – Internet slang for ‘Floof on lap syndrome’, when having an animal on one’s lap prevents or discourages people from doing other activities.
In use: “His phone rang, but it was across the room, and he was FOLS, with his new puppy sacked out on his lap, so he just let it go to voice mail.”
Floofshare
Floofshare (floofinition) – 1. A plan to give space, food, or objects to an animal.
In use: “Whenever he eats a sandwich with lunchmeat at home, the floofshare is incorporated into the planning so that he’s ready when the cat trots over and begins singing for his portion.”
2. An animal who lives with others or frequently visits others.
In use: “Several successful floofshare programs involve animal shelters who take cats and dogs to nursing homes. All appreciate the additional interactions and gain a break from their routines.”
Floof Web
Floof Web (floofinition) – Overlay network that uses special software and access codes known only to animals. The floof web is part of the uniweb, a universal web which connects planets and dimensions to one another, providing animals with powers that seem unique or magical to humans, but is advanced quantum computing that accesses the quantum verse.
In use: “Using the floof web, the household pets discovered that a huge earthquake was going to strike. The animals did their best to warn the humans, but humans are simple creatures, with limited intelligence and communication skills, frustrating the animals’ efforts.”
Floofbrag
Floofbrag (floofinition) – Recount or comment about animals in a boastful manner.
In use: “He was a quiet man until someone mentioned dogs, and then he became a floofbrag as he shared stories about his home pack’s antics and history.”
Floof Lunge
Floof Lunge (floofinition) 1. An animal’s sudden forward thrust to attack someone or seize something.
In use: “Jack Ryan was the household’s smallest canine, but the Dachshund was a floof lunge master when it came to treats, often gobbling up several of the other animals’ offerings before they even realized it was there!”
2. A person’s sudden attempt to grab an animal.
In use: “They were attempting to capture the cat now called Comet but she was adept at reading animals and always evaded their floof lunges.”
Floofus Mirabilis
Floofus Mirabilis – (floofinition) – A wonderful animal.
In use: “Many people think their pet is a floofus mirabilis, overlooking their floofgressions, such as stealing food or sleeping where they weren’t supposed to, which, though exasperating, was also charming.”
Michael Seidel, writer 