Abfloofdicate
Abfloofdicate (floofinition) – To yield or surrender to an animal’s wishes, desires, or intentions.
In use: “Whenever her dog presented Bob with his tilted head, floppy ears, silly grin gaze, Bob abfloofdicated, saying, “Just tell me what you want,” because he knew that resistance was a joke.”
Flooftinnabulation
Flooftinnabulation (floofinition) – A tinkling or crashing sound associated with animals.
In use: “Hearing a noise from the bedroom, Keri assumed it was a flooftinnabulation — because Jade was in a mood — of course, as always, because she’s a cat and a queen and bored — caused by the little tabby going along, knocking everything off the dresser again.”
Idiot Floofvant
Idiot Floofvant (floofinition) – Person who is highly knowledgeable about one animal or species but knows little about other animals or species.
In use: “Having lived with thirteen cats over the last five decades (and friends with a dozen more), Michael acknowledged he’s an idiot floofvant who knows cats and that’s it.”
Ecfloofsiastical
Ecfloofsiastical (floofinition) – Of or relating to animals.
In use: “Although laws protecting animals have been established for several decades, the net has been a catalyst for more ecfloofsiastical laws, with growing insistence that these laws also be staunchly enforced.”
Frontfloof
Frontfloof (floofinition) – The animal who stands up to represent other animals as act as figurehead presenting their requests and complaints.
In use: “Three cats, four dogs, two birds, and multiple fish, amphibians, and reptiles, Lemon the goden retriever — named for her habit of stealing lemons and eating them — was the household’s unquestioned frontfloof and their respected enforcer. One woof from her brought treats out and ended fights and arguments.”
FloofsNotes
FloofsNotes (floofinition) – 1. Abbreviated notes and pamphlets prepared and maintained by animals summarizing people, places, and events.
In use: “The stray didn’t have FloofsNotes so a local floof shared his dog-eared copy. Using it, they were able to find a house where the lady took her in so she could give birth in safety.”
2. Records or notes kept about animals as an aid to people’s knowledge about an animal.
In use: “Adopting two new rescue kittens, Karla immediately invested in a lab notebook to use as FloofsNotes to record the health, activity, and behavior of her new fur friends. They could come in handy if something happened later.”
There & Gone
The floof is there and then he’s gone,
And then back beside me like a remembered song.
Pleasing me with his looks and presence,
Causing me to give him treats and attention as presents.
So it goes for a number of years,
Feeding him, tending him, addressing worries and fears.
Till it comes, a day so still,
Death has finally broken his will.
And he’s not beside me because he’s gone,
Till my mind brings him back like a remembered song.
Floofnata
Floofnata (floofinition) – Song composed by an animal, typically with three or four movements, traditionally performed at night, when others are sleeping.
In use: “As usual, three in the morning came, and Biscuit began her floofnata, awakening everyone else in the house who began shouting at her to stop.”
OFWB
OFWB (floofinition) – Floofhand for ‘one floof wrecking ball’, an animal which creates more destruction, mischief, or chaos than other animals.”
In use: “As a puppy, Chloe was a OFWB, destroying pillows, shoes, toilet paper, plants, and shower curtains, a trait which didn’t change as she matured; she only became more clever about her chaos.”
Michael Seidel, writer 