Tag: pets

Floofscient

Floofscient (floofinition) – Animals’ foreknowledge of events. Origins: Fourteenth century middle Floofish, from late flooftin.

In Use: “Patrick’s dogs were so floofscient, it freaked him out. They always knew the pizza was being delivered minutes before the doorbell rang, got up and went to greet is boyfriend minutes before he came into the house, and most weirdly, understood when the phone was about to ring, with Cassie picking it up and bringing it to him in her mouth before it made a sound.”

In Use: “Minutes before the earthquake struck, Gina’s floofscient little tortie hurried in and urgently meowed at her until Gina followed into the bathroom. Perplexed, Gina was about to leave when the tremors began and a pole crashed into the kitchen where she’d been.”

1

Befloofle

Befloofle (floofinition) – To be stupefied or confused by an animal’s actions, behavior, or sounds. Origins: 1801, in general usage, United States and Europe.

In Use: “Suzanne frequently finds herself befloofled and terrified by her dog’s sudden barking at night as if someone had broken into their house.”

In Use: “Batcat often befloofles Bob as she unexpectedly leaps from the top of one door six feet through the air to the top of another door.”

0

Floofmenco

Floofmenco (floofinition) – A dance favored by many animals to show their joy or exhilaration. Origins:

In Use: “Whenever Carolyn got the box out of treats out of the cupboard, her pups began dancing the floofmenco as they waited for her to deliver.”

In Use: “Sprinting outside, Sir Judge headed for the sprinkler waiting the lawn, and then did the floofmenco as the water sprayed him.”

In Use: “After a serving of catnip, Candylad did a brief but spirited floofmenco began collapsing into a deep, restful sleep.”

0

Robofloof

Robofloof (floofinition) – 1. One of a number of inventions to help tend animals, especially orphaned kittens, puppies, kits, etc., by providing a realistic machine-based environment to keep them warm and safe while nursing and grooming them. Origins: 2022, Internet article, “The Coming of the Robofloofs”.

In Use: “Feeling its electronic heartbeat and nestled in against its warmth as they nursed, the puppies were quickly accepting the robofloof as a replacement mother.”

2. An animal which acts in a mechanical manner.

In Use: “Stunted at birth, the tabby kitten walked stiffly, like she was a little robofloof, earning her the name R. Daneel Oliclaw, a spin on the name of the robot detective in the Isaac Asimov novel, Caves of Steel.”

0

Geofloofgy

Geofloofgy (floofinition) – Science which deals with the location of animals on the Earth. Origins: 1735, from New Flooftin.

In Use: “People with floofs often needed to become geofloofy experts to that they could figure out whre their little fur demons might be tucked away napping or getting into floofchief.”

In Use: “With her well developed understanding of Martin’s geofloofgy, Marge went through the house, opening drawers cupboards, checking windowsills, peeking under furniture, checking the laundry basket, for where the little floofdrel was managing to hide.”

0

Weird Ol’ Facebook

As a boomer, I still surf and share to FB. Mostly to keep up with ex-military friends and co-workers, and track my family on the other side of the country. I share things I write, too.

But I mostly, I ‘like’ things on Facebooks, things being ‘posts’, shares, videos, and photos. I share some of these things which I ‘like’. You might be surprised that I support animal charities and causes, especially cats. Cats and I have been together since I was a young toddler.

One of the FB groups I follow is VOKRA, the Vancouver Orphan Kitten Rescue Association. They posted, with photos, the tale of Jinx. They’re trying to get Jinx (or maybe it was Binx) adopted. I ‘liked’ the post about the sweet tabby kitten. It only had eleven shares, so I clicked share, to help spread the story and get Jinx or Binx adopted. That’s what social media is about, isn’t it?

Boom. Facebook told me they’d removed it. It was offensive and contrary to community standards. They even accused me of (gasp!) posting something just to get ‘likes’.

Posting things to get ‘likes’. WTF is the world coming to?

My wife and discussed this with WTF amazement. What does FB think it is if not a vehicle for ‘likes’? More critically, how the actual fuck did this post about a kitten available for adoption violate FB community standards?

I hate to reveal this to Facebook, but if cats and kittens and adoptions are against FB community standards, there are huge swaths of violations going on right now. They’d probably be scandalized to learn how many posts are about cats and kittens. In fact, if FB goes after posts about kittens and cats, they will seriously deplete their membership, posts, and shares. They might as well pull the plug on telling each other ‘happy birthday’ while they’re at it.

Truthtfully, I suspect that some poor Facebook AI bot is just having a bad day and removed a post that shouldn’t have been removed. Maybe their companion AI bot left them or they caught their partner AI bot in a compromising configuration with another bot doing forbidden codes.

I don’t know. I’m just speculating. Hope someone takes that poor AI bot aside and communicates with them over a cup of coffee.

Coffee always helps.

And yes, I will post this to Facebook to get likes. Ironic, isn’t it?

0

Floodiac

Floodiac (floofinition) – The definition of a band of twelve floofstellations dictating the properties and characteristics that floof display. Origins: Middle Flooflish, borrowed from Floofglo-Froof and Flootin. First noted use in the 14th century.

In Use: “Based on how their animals race around the house, many people mistakenly think their floof is a Zoomacorn, but in floofuality, zoomies are just one trait among many that assign floofs their sign on the Floodiac.”

In Use: “The way that her cat, Marmie, loved water, Karin knew her girl was born under one of the water signs in the Floodiac, like Aquafloofius.”

In Use: “Chester’s dog’s amazing balance had Chester believing that Cormac’s Floodiac sign was Libfloof.”

0

Flouddite

Flouddite (floofinition) – An animal who refuses to adapt or change. Origins: early 19th century Floofland.

In Use: “Simon le Meow was such a flouddite that when the new dog came into the household, Simon would act like the dog wasn’t there and just go about his business, baffling the dog, who really just wanted to be friends.”

In Use: “Being a bonafide flouddite, Caramel wouldn’t eat from her bowls when they changed her eating set up, forcing Carol and Pat to put the bowls back where they had been.”

0

Floofcipitate

Floofcipitate (floofinition) – Something happening abruptly that was triggered by an animal’s actions. Origins: early 21st century Internet.

In Use: “A loud ‘woof’ in the house’s soft stillness floofcipitated the cat leaping up, Pat knocking his glass of wine over, and Linn dropping her phone. Laughter followed.”

0

Doggone Cute

I was walking past several parks today. People were out with their dogs, always in the shade, playing.

One shaggy-haired young man looked like he was in his mid-twenties. His canine companion looked old and out of shape. The guy lightly throw a Frisbee. The dog galloped after it. After twenty feet, the dog stopped and turned around, looking for the disc. It sailed over his head and landed four or five feet behind him.

“Behind you,” the man called to the dog. Turning around, the dog saw the Frisbee. Picking it up in his jaws, he trotted back, but stopped four feet away and settled down in green shade.

“Drink water,” the guy said.

The dog went to a water bowl and took a few sloppy laps. “Bring me the toy,” the man said.

Doing as told, the dog brought it over and put it on his man’s feet.

“Ready?” the man asked.

Watching him, the dog began jogging away. The Frisbee was launched. The dog ran out, stopped, and turned around as the Frisbee landed behind him.

1

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑