Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Pecfloofniary (floofinition) – Of or related to the money spent on an animal, or an animal’s worth.
In Use: “After Jared spent money on his floof’s medical needs, many people focused on the situation’s pecfloofniary aspect, but to him, his dog’s companionship was priceless, and he would prostitute himself if it brought in the money for his dog’s medicine, surgery, and x-rays.”
Mood: Bowiedacious
A front has driven in, strewning clouds of different complexities over Ashlandia, giving us variables in lights, shadows, temperatures, and expectations. Sumumn still holds but it’s beginning to look like autmer as trees flirt with new colors in their leaves. Only dropped to the high fifties last night, and today’s high temperature will spank 90 degrees F.
This is Monday, September 23, 2024. You understand that 2024’s ninth month is closing out and there are but 94 days until Kwanzaa, 93 days until Christmas, and 93 days until Hanukkah? There’s also only 43 days until the U.S.’s 2024 elections. Things are getting tight.
Tucker (pronounced Tuck-ah) inspired today’s musical choice, although coffee contributed. Having indulged in my first hit of black goodness, I saw Tucker came out from eating. Moving slow, his eyes were mostly closed and his tongue was busy going over his whiskes and mouth. Sitting, he commenced to watching.
That’s when The Neurons or somebody caused me to sing, “Tucker. I just fed a kitty named Tucker.” This was done to the tune of “Blue Jean” by David Bowie. Right after that, the 1984 song fired up in my morning mental music stream (Trademark dished). It’s a catchy little Bowie number, jaunty with memorable lines which don’t convey any great depths. How did he do that?
Stay positive, confident, and strong. Lean forward and vote blue in 2024. Coffee has been served in the office; here’s the music. Cheers
Near Floof Object (floofinition) – Any object which orbits or lands within a floof-specified zone. Such Near Floof Objects (NFOs) can be deemed by the floof to be a threat or hazard and needs to be attacked, or potential food which needs to be eaten. Origins: 1981, NAFA (National American Floof Administration) report on NFOs: “Sniff, Eat, Warn”.
In Use: “Some floofs are floofadaisical about Near Floof Objects, allowing something to come as close as four inches before stirring themselves to take action, but Dynamo believed anything in the same house as him was a NFO, and would sniff it, warn it with loud repetitive barks, and try to eat it if its barks didn’t scare it away.”
Floofzantine (floofinition) 1. A complex animal. Origins: first noted on the Internet in the early twenty-first century.
In Use: “Little Serenity was a floofzantine, one moment a peaceful sweetheart, twisting into yowling destructor without even the benefit of a three-second countdown, making it difficult to engage with her for more than fifteen minutes at a time.”
2. An intricate or complex arrangement for animals.
In Use: “Living with fifteen rescued cats, a floofzantine structure was set up for the cats’ entertainment — which also entertained the homeowner.”
Confloofgence (floofinition) – The coming together of floofs; a unity among floofs. Origins: first noted use in New Floofland, 1860.
In Use: “The dog, cat, and kitten sitting together on the kitchen floor waiting to be fed was a moment of pleasing and historic confloofgence for Kamala, who never thought she’d see harmony among the floofs.”
Imfloofervise (floofinition) – 1. To informally make or arrange something for an animal without planning. Origins: 2020, worldwide web.
In Use: “Her floofie looked chilly, so Millie took off her sweater and imfloofervised a blanket for him.”
In Use: “Rescuing a kitten, Marcus had to imfloofervise a carrier to take the tiny sick animal home and give her care.”
2. An impromptu singing or acting performance by an animal.
In Use: “Simone ordered her dog to stop barking, and the dog responded by imfloofervising being shot, opening his eyes wide and collapsing on his side.”
In Use: “Jamal’s bird often surprised guests with imfloofervised comedy routines about what the dog was doing, when Jamal didn’t have a dog.”
Floofyfest (floofinition) – A gathering of animals to celebrate the joy of life, the happiness of freedom, and the need for independence. Floofstorians believe it to have originally been organized by cats. Its time and place remains secret. No human is said to have ever witnessed Floofyfest. To date, the only insight that Floofyfest ever took place is from mentions in the remnants of The Chronicles found at Floofhenge. Some floofologists suggest that Floofhenge was the secret site of the first Floofyfest. Origins: circa 3100 BCE, old Floofish.
In Use: “Humper disappeared for three days to attend Floofyfest, and even though she knew her family was devastated by her extended absence, the opportunity to attend Floofyfest was too great to pass.”
Confloofbondus (floofinition) – A natural condition where a human and an animal, or several animals, establish strong emotional and physical connections. Origins: Internet, 2024
In Use: “The Floofnet — that part of the world wide web dedicated to animal information — is rich with evidence of confloofbondus, such as large dogs taking in and carry for orphaned kittens.”
In Use: “Videos and stories of confloofbondus helped many people endure stay-at-home protocols during the COVID-19 pandemic lockdowns.”
Infloofduction (floofinition) – The process of leading an animal or making it known to another person or animal via a formal act, announcement, or recommendation. Origin:
In Use: “The challenge of welcoming a new animal or family member to a household can often be mitigated by a patient and well-thought out infloofduction.”
In Use: “Sharon B. was prepared for cautious infloofductions between the new kittens and her old Tom, Catmandu, but Catmandu heard and smelled the little ones and began grooming them like he’d given birth to them himself.”
Floofartaphily (floofinition) – The collecting of knickknacks, artwork, trinkets, and materials related to or depicting animals. Origins: Circa 2000, Internet.
In Use: “Carolyn enjoyed floofartaphily, with little statutes of cats, dogs, geese, and cows abounding in shadow boxes or decorating shelves, but her passion were pigs, and there were two hundred items featuring pigs, including paintings, drawings, pillows with pigs on them, statues, and salt and paper shakers, in her living room.”
Michael Seidel, writer 