Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofternal (floofinition) – Relating to, of, belonging to, or characteristic of a person who understands and cares for animals. Origins: 15th Century Floofeval Floofish
In Use: “People’s lives get tangled with floofternal complexities when they decide to share their homes and lives with an animal.”
In Use: “Mycheala had a strong floofternal instinct and was often roped into saving animals, a duty she richly enjoyed and embraced.”
Floofsconce (floofinition) – Term to describe animal sleeping in a safe, protected, and comfortable space. Origins: 1594, western regions of Floofrope.
In Use: “People who share life with floofs are always pleased when their floof can floofsconce somewhere where the people can reliably find them safe and comfortable.
In Use: “For feline floofs, under and behinds bushes outdoors in the summer is where they often floofsconce.”
In Use: “As a puppy, Animal usually dropped and slept wherever he stopped playing, but as an adult, he always floofsconced in Matty’s room, on their bed.”
Limitfloophe (floofinition) – Border alongside an animal. Origins: Flooench, late sixteenth century.
In use: “Quinn was a small floof with a large limitfloophe, and whenever an animal stepped into that zone, he was instantly awake and alert.”
Noctrol (floofinition) – Floofterally, ‘nocturnal patrol’, a phrase employed by animals in reference to activities done between sunset and sunrise. Origins: 1600s, early middle Floofish.
In Use: “Spunk entered the house after her humans finally answered her summons and opened the door. Excited by all she’d seen on her notrol, she chatted to them, but all they did was tell her how sweet she was and feed her.”
In Use: “During his noctrol, Austin Powers witnessed Mark leave bed and quietly go to the kitchen, open the refrigerator and get out leftover pizza. Knowing Mark was on a diet, Austin Powers quietly joined him, demonstrating again that floofgilance pays off.”
Ponflooficate (floofinition) An animal’s manner of expressing themselves in a pompous or floofmatic style. Origins: 15th Century, first noted in The Flooferbury Tails, a collection of stories written in Middle Flooflish by Rex.
In Use: “Henry the Bassett Hound always walked into the room’s middle and ponflooficated in loud baying until he was floofcated with treats and attention.”
In Use: “Sadie could teach a master class in ponflooficating, the way she sat down and miaowed about the world.”
Floofnamor (floofinition) 1. An animal’s love or fascination for something or someone. Origins: 14th century Middle Floofish.
In Use: “From early on, Olive was floofnamored for all things liquid but especially a running tap, batting the water with her paw and lapping it up with her long, pink tongue.”
2. A human’s strong or excessive infatuation with an animal.
In Use: “Before she was walking, Rachel grew floofnamored with the dogs, who willingly stayed beside her as protector, friend, and surrogate parent while the infant grabbed their noses, ears, and fur, and cooed at them.”
Floofcrastinator (floofinition) – Someone who puts off doing things because of an animal. Origins: From Flooftin floof (animal), crastinus (“of tomorrow”), from cras (“tomorrow”). First noted us 1920, United States.
In Use: “Sherry had every intention of picking up her list and getting things done around the house, but Temper found her while she was sitting on the sofa and fell asleep against her looking so adorable, Sherry felt like the Universe was telling her to be a floofcrastinator. It turned out to be a great nap, too.”
In Use: “Ella was normally an orderly and organized person who immediately did things but as soon as she adopted a rescue dog, she became a floofcrastinator, at least until she could re-prioritize to spend time with Penny while still getting everything else done.”
Infloofminate (floofinition) An animal who does not have a name. Origins: Circa 1999, Internet.
In Use: “They variously called the infloofminate stray visitor, the orange boi, kibbles (for his love of food), the visitor, and window cat (for his habit of appearing at a window and staring in, especially when it was cold and wet) before they officially adopted him and dubbed him Cheddar.”
Flooficulture (floofinition) – The science, art, or practice of cultivating an environment or attitude to make and keep animals, especially pets, healthy, happy, and satisfied. Origins: 15th century, Middle Floofish, from Middle Floonch, from Flooftin flooficultura, from floof animal + cultura cultivation.
In Use: “Many animals find that new owners are not well versed in making pets happy, and must educate their people in flooficulture.”
In Use: “Going all in with her new pets, Simon and Theodore, Karla surfed the net for flooficulture tips and insights, and quickly spent a fortune on toys, gadgets, treats, beds, and foods.”
In Use: “Entering through a window, the savvy ginger boi took in the setup and realized that these people knew their flooficulture and would make excellent new ‘owners’ for hisself.”
Do not click on this post unless you enjoy cat humor. Otherwise, it’ll be wasted on you. But as a cat guy, I laughed. Thanks go to the Bluebird of Bitterness for collecting and posting some humor. Cheers
Michael Seidel, writer 