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Monfloopoly (floofinition) – A situation or position that arises because one animal dominates or controls others’ thinking and planning. Antonym: polfloopoly.
In use: “The other pets were old and well-loved, but the kitten arrived and established a monfloopoly, seizing preferred laps and napping places, and dominating attention with her demands to play or cuddle. But she was such a sweet force that the other pets became willing slaves to the little floofball.”
Ovfloofture (floofinition) – An animal’s initiative toward agreement or action.
In use: “To floofjole treats from his people, Boo began by toddling over to them and rubbing against their legs. Next in the ovfloofture, he’d looked up, meet their eyes, and whisper, “Meow?” until they floofpitulated.”
Astrofloof (floofinition) – 1. Animal who is out of this world in appearance or behavior.
In use: “With his fur, makings, and strange bark, Angie’s dog was other-worldly, an astrofloof, perhaps part of an alien invasion.
2. (Web slang) A fake animal, or one who seems to be phony or inauthentic, or presents themselves as being something else.
In use: “Raised by huskies, the Siamese had adopted canine behavior, a little astrofloof whose meow even sounded like a bark, and became the alpha dog.”
Exflooferbate (floofinition) – To have a situation worsen or a problem complicated by the presence or behavior of animals.
In use: “Her day was already scrambled beyond her limits when the cat exflooferbated it by bringing in a live robin and setting it free in the living room.”
Flerd (floofinition) – 1. A mixed group of animals.
In use: “The noisy flerd included a litter of puppies, a flock of baby ducks, and a clowder of cats.”
2. Animals process to gather, lead, or drive others.
In use: “The cat flerded her kittens back to their safe zone.”
3. (Web slang): a floof nerd, i.e., a person slavishly devoted to intellectual or academic pursuits about animals.
In use: “She was a real flerd when it came to floof pop (floop) music, able to recite when groups and performers released songs and esoteric facts about the music production.”
Floofzpah (alternative spellings: floofzpaw, floofzpa) (floofinition) – supreme self-confidence in an animal.
In use: “Demonstrating her trademark floofzpah, the tabby jumped up onto the dinner table, picked up a piece of fried chicken in her mouth, turned around, jumped down, and was dust before anyone could react.”
Floof Out (floofinition) – Animal who reacts to another animal with an overly ostentatious display.
In use: “A doe stole into the yard and began nibbling at the grass. Star rose up with an outraged howl and glared through the glass at the interloper. Sighing, Barb said, “Stop the floof out, Star. It’s just a deer.” Then she took a photo of the cat and deer and posted it on Facebook.”
Flafler (floofinition) – Interfloof shorthand for ‘flat floofer’, a term used for animals who usually flatten out to sleep.
In use: “Diehard roly polys — animals who curl up to sleep — sneer at flaflers, stretching out like they’re melting in the sun, exposing themselves to being touched without warning.”
Michael Seidel, writer 